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Title: Questions That Haunt Me
Source: [None]
URL Source: [None]
Published: Apr 26, 2015
Author: email
Post Date: 2015-04-26 16:51:40 by Lod
Keywords: None
Views: 175
Comments: 35

How important does a person have to be before they are considered assassinated instead of just murdered?

Why does a round pizza come in a square box?

What disease did cured ham actually have?

How is it that we put man on the moon before we figured out it would be a good idea to put wheels on luggage?

Why is it that people say they 'slept like a baby' when babies wake up like every two hours?

Why do people pay to go up tall buildings and then put money in binoculars to look at things on the ground?

Why do doctors leave the room while you change? They're going to see you naked anyway...

Why is 'bra' singular and 'panties' plural?

Why do toasters always have a setting that burns the toast to a horrible crisp, which no decent human being would eat?

If Jimmy cracks corn and no one cares, why is there a stupid song about him?

Why does Goofy stand erect while Pluto remains on all fours? They're both dogs!

If corn oil is made from corn, and vegetable oil is made from vegetables, what is baby oil made from?

Do the Alphabet song and Twinkle, Twinkle Little Star have the same tune?

Why did you just try singing the two songs above?

Did you ever notice that when you blow in a dog's face, he gets mad at you, but when you take him for a car ride, he sticks his head out the window?

Why, Why, Why Do we press harder on a remote control when we know the batteries are getting dead?

Why do banks charge a fee on 'insufficient funds' when they know there is not enough money?

Why does someone believe you when you say there are four billion stars, but check when you say the paint is wet?

Why do they use sterilized needles for death by lethal injection?

Why doesn't Tarzan have a beard?

Why does Superman stop bullets with his chest, but ducks when you throw a revolver at him?

Why do Kamikaze pilots wear helmets?

If people evolved from apes, why are there still apes?

Why is it that no matter what color bubble bath you use the bubbles are always white?

Is there ever a day that mattresses are not on sale?

Why do people constantly return to the refrigerator with hopes that something new to eat will have materialized?

Why do people keep running over a thread a dozen times with their vacuum cleaner, then reach down, pick it up, examine it, then put it down to give the vacuum one more chance?

Why is it that no plastic bag will open from the end on your first try?

How do those dead bugs get into those enclosed light fixtures?

Why is it that whenever you attempt to catch something that's falling off the table you always manage to knock something else over?

In winter why do we try to keep the house as warm as it was in summer when we complained about the heat?

How come you never hear father-in-law jokes?

And my FAVORITE.........

The statistics on sanity is that one out of every four persons is suffering from some sort of mental illness. Think of your three best friends -- if they're okay, then it's you.

One more: if AutoCategorize doesn't work, why is it here?

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#1. To: Lod (#0)

Why do those drive-through ATMs have Braille markings on them?

Fred Mertz  posted on  2015-04-26   16:56:08 ET  Reply   Trace   Private Reply  


#2. To: Fred Mertz, Lod (#1)

Why do those drive-through ATMs have Braille markings on them?

Same reason cars with automatic transmission have tachometers, it's cheaper to build standard modules and replace auxiliary equipment as needed/requested. That and the Braille Lobby has been fielding sharpshooters bent on severely punishing non-compliance.

corruptissima re publica plurimae leges - Tacitus

Dakmar  posted on  2015-04-26   17:16:15 ET  Reply   Trace   Private Reply  


#3. To: Fred Mertz, Lod (#1)

Do they use a sterile alcohol rub before administering lethal injections?

corruptissima re publica plurimae leges - Tacitus

Dakmar  posted on  2015-04-26   17:17:35 ET  Reply   Trace   Private Reply  


#4. To: Fred Mertz, Dakmar, 4 (#1)

Other questions that make me toss and turn at night.

“The most dangerous man to any government is the man who is able to think things out... without regard to the prevailing superstitions and taboos. Almost inevitably he comes to the conclusion that the government he lives under is dishonest, insane, intolerable.” ~ H. L. Mencken

Lod  posted on  2015-04-26   17:31:21 ET  Reply   Trace   Private Reply  


#5. To: Fred Mertz (#1)

In the remote chance that Stevie Wonder's limousine might pull in at a random ATM anywhere in America so he can pull some $$ from the backseat?? That's the only scenario that warrants Braille buttons, IMO.

 photo 001g.gif
“With the exception of Whites, the rule among the peoples of the world, whether residing in their homelands or settled in Western democracies, is ethnocentrism and moral particularism: they stick together and good means what is good for their ethnic group."
-Alex Kurtagic

X-15  posted on  2015-04-26   17:42:49 ET  Reply   Trace   Private Reply  


#6. To: Lod (#0) (Edited)

Why do they use sterilized needles for death by lethal injection?

Had I read the entire article before posting I would have used a more authoritative font to pose my hypothetical.

corruptissima re publica plurimae leges - Tacitus

Dakmar  posted on  2015-04-26   17:47:18 ET  Reply   Trace   Private Reply  


#7. To: X-15 (#5)

Why couldn't Stevie Wonder's driver just get the money for him? Why even be rich and hire a driver if you gotta be hassled to run out in the rain and get the check? Especially if you're blind...of course I guess you wouldn't care how you looked, haha. No, if I was blind, and very wealthy and hired drivers, I would fire them for sending me up to the ATM Machine to get some cash.

corruptissima re publica plurimae leges - Tacitus

Dakmar  posted on  2015-04-26   17:54:55 ET  Reply   Trace   Private Reply  


#8. To: X-15 (#5)

I think it's because of production reasons. All are the same whether walk up or drive through.

This is making my head hurt.

Fred Mertz  posted on  2015-04-26   17:57:26 ET  Reply   Trace   Private Reply  


#9. To: Dakmar (#6)

...I would have used a more authoritative font to pose my hypothetical.

Since our email clients let us select the fonts we see, you'd be pissing in the wind on that endeavor.

Just saying FYI.

“The most dangerous man to any government is the man who is able to think things out... without regard to the prevailing superstitions and taboos. Almost inevitably he comes to the conclusion that the government he lives under is dishonest, insane, intolerable.” ~ H. L. Mencken

Lod  posted on  2015-04-26   17:58:03 ET  Reply   Trace   Private Reply  


#10. To: Dakmar, Fred Mertz (#7)

You just dismantled the ONLY reason for Braille ATM buttons. Add to it, a LOT of ATM's have a combination touch-screen AND Braille buttons: you can't do it if you're blind.

 photo 001g.gif
“With the exception of Whites, the rule among the peoples of the world, whether residing in their homelands or settled in Western democracies, is ethnocentrism and moral particularism: they stick together and good means what is good for their ethnic group."
-Alex Kurtagic

X-15  posted on  2015-04-26   17:59:35 ET  Reply   Trace   Private Reply  


#11. To: Fred Mertz (#8)

This is making my head hurt.

Yes, imagining Stevie and limo-driver headed out to an ATM is almost too much.

It's just not gonna happen, imo. :-)

“The most dangerous man to any government is the man who is able to think things out... without regard to the prevailing superstitions and taboos. Almost inevitably he comes to the conclusion that the government he lives under is dishonest, insane, intolerable.” ~ H. L. Mencken

Lod  posted on  2015-04-26   18:02:37 ET  Reply   Trace   Private Reply  


#12. To: Lod (#9)

Since our email clients let us select the fonts we see, you'd be pissing in the wind on that endeavor.

My email clients are faithful to me, where did you go wrong?

corruptissima re publica plurimae leges - Tacitus

Dakmar  posted on  2015-04-26   18:03:18 ET  Reply   Trace   Private Reply  


#13. To: Lod, Fred Mertz, X-15, NeoconNailed, Esso, christine, Jethro Tull (#11)

Yes, imagining Stevie and limo-driver headed out to an ATM is almost too much.

I'm getting an idea for a parody rock opera

corruptissima re publica plurimae leges - Tacitus

Dakmar  posted on  2015-04-26   18:06:52 ET  Reply   Trace   Private Reply  


#14. To: Dakmar (#13)

They need the bills for lap dances and g-string liners.

“The most dangerous man to any government is the man who is able to think things out... without regard to the prevailing superstitions and taboos. Almost inevitably he comes to the conclusion that the government he lives under is dishonest, insane, intolerable.” ~ H. L. Mencken

Lod  posted on  2015-04-26   18:14:14 ET  Reply   Trace   Private Reply  


#15. To: Dakmar (#13)

I'm getting an idea for a parody rock opera

Too late: "...That deaf dumb and blind kid; Sure plays a mean pin ball..."

 photo 001g.gif
“With the exception of Whites, the rule among the peoples of the world, whether residing in their homelands or settled in Western democracies, is ethnocentrism and moral particularism: they stick together and good means what is good for their ethnic group."
-Alex Kurtagic

X-15  posted on  2015-04-26   18:16:09 ET  Reply   Trace   Private Reply  


#16. To: X-15 (#10)

You just dismantled the ONLY reason for Braille ATM buttons.

Bullshit. Plenty of blind people use ATMs, just not usually at drive-up windows.

corruptissima re publica plurimae leges - Tacitus

Dakmar  posted on  2015-04-26   18:17:45 ET  Reply   Trace   Private Reply  


#17. To: X-15 (#15) (Edited)

Too late: "...That deaf dumb and blind kid; Sure plays a mean pin ball..."

I was picturing Stevie Wonder arguing with the local sewage commission over a drainage issue, but sure, we could work in some sort of video game reference, I guess...

corruptissima re publica plurimae leges - Tacitus

Dakmar  posted on  2015-04-26   18:22:21 ET  Reply   Trace   Private Reply  


#18. To: All (#7) (Edited)

No, if I was blind, and very wealthy and hired drivers, I would fire them for sending me up to the ATM Machine to get some cash.

ps: I'd fire them even if I wasn't blind.

corruptissima re publica plurimae leges - Tacitus

Dakmar  posted on  2015-04-26   18:26:43 ET  Reply   Trace   Private Reply  


#19. To: Lod (#0)

Why do they put cargo on a ship and shipment in a car?

"Have Brain, Will Travel

Turtle  posted on  2015-04-26   18:30:23 ET  Reply   Trace   Private Reply  


#20. To: Turtle (#19) (Edited)

Same reason they call it riding a bull but driving cattle.

corruptissima re publica plurimae leges - Tacitus

Dakmar  posted on  2015-04-26   18:34:05 ET  Reply   Trace   Private Reply  


#21. To: Dakmar (#16)

I've never seen it happen once, maybe I need to get out more?

 photo 001g.gif
“With the exception of Whites, the rule among the peoples of the world, whether residing in their homelands or settled in Western democracies, is ethnocentrism and moral particularism: they stick together and good means what is good for their ethnic group."
-Alex Kurtagic

X-15  posted on  2015-04-26   18:41:12 ET  Reply   Trace   Private Reply  


#22. To: Turtle (#19)

Drivers Wanted

corruptissima re publica plurimae leges - Tacitus

Dakmar  posted on  2015-04-26   18:43:00 ET  (1 image) Reply   Trace   Private Reply  


#23. To: X-15 (#21)

I've never seen it happen once, maybe I need to get out more?

How do you suppose blind people buy beer? It ain't f*****g magic, they use cash. Or cards, but beer doesn't just magically materialize for blind people, they have to go out and get it just like we.

corruptissima re publica plurimae leges - Tacitus

Dakmar  posted on  2015-04-26   18:48:01 ET  Reply   Trace   Private Reply  


#24. To: Dakmar (#23)

I never see blind people, let alone see one using an ATM. Or buying beer.

 photo 001g.gif
“With the exception of Whites, the rule among the peoples of the world, whether residing in their homelands or settled in Western democracies, is ethnocentrism and moral particularism: they stick together and good means what is good for their ethnic group."
-Alex Kurtagic

X-15  posted on  2015-04-26   19:07:19 ET  Reply   Trace   Private Reply  


#25. To: X-15 (#24)

I never see blind people, let alone see one using an ATM. Or buying beer.

Not to worry, they don't see you either.

“The most dangerous man to any government is the man who is able to think things out... without regard to the prevailing superstitions and taboos. Almost inevitably he comes to the conclusion that the government he lives under is dishonest, insane, intolerable.” ~ H. L. Mencken

Lod  posted on  2015-04-26   19:21:05 ET  Reply   Trace   Private Reply  


#26. To: Lod (#25)

:rolls eyes: OY VEY!!! :)

 photo 001g.gif
“With the exception of Whites, the rule among the peoples of the world, whether residing in their homelands or settled in Western democracies, is ethnocentrism and moral particularism: they stick together and good means what is good for their ethnic group."
-Alex Kurtagic

X-15  posted on  2015-04-26   19:54:10 ET  Reply   Trace   Private Reply  


#27. To: Lod (#0)

Someone channeling George Carlin?

John Howard says: There are 4 schools of economics:
Marxism: steal everything
Keynesianism: steal by counterfeiting whenever needed
Chicago school (Milton Friedman): steal by counterfeiting at a steady, predictable rate
Austrians: don't steal

Democrats don't mind war as long as they can have big government. Republicans don't mind big government as long as they can have war.
'Wiped off the Map' – The Rumor of the Century

PnbC  posted on  2015-04-26   20:11:45 ET  Reply   Trace   Private Reply  


#28. To: Lod (#0)

"If people evolved from apes, why are there still apes" -- another great one- liner here, but one of the questions over which evolutionism falls totally to pieces -- nice little dividend.

NeoconsNailed  posted on  2015-04-26   21:06:31 ET  Reply   Trace   Private Reply  


#29. To: NeoconsNailed (#28)

Only to those who don't really understand how evolution is supposed to work. You can always tell because biologists never refer to it as evolutionISM.

John Howard says: There are 4 schools of economics:
Marxism: steal everything
Keynesianism: steal by counterfeiting whenever needed
Chicago school (Milton Friedman): steal by counterfeiting at a steady, predictable rate
Austrians: don't steal

Democrats don't mind war as long as they can have big government. Republicans don't mind big government as long as they can have war.
'Wiped off the Map' – The Rumor of the Century

PnbC  posted on  2015-04-26   21:25:06 ET  Reply   Trace   Private Reply  


#30. To: PnbC (#29) (Edited)

Do tell! But let's cut to the chase -- where are the transitional forms? And it is most certainly evolutionism -- a belief system in supposed science that can't be verified or replicated.

Did I say it's a belief system? Nay, it's a religious FAITH passionately adhered to by millions of fanatics. In my personal observation and experience!

NeoconsNailed  posted on  2015-04-26   21:28:19 ET  Reply   Trace   Private Reply  


#31. To: X-15 (#24)

I never see blind people, let alone see one using an ATM. Or buying beer.

I've met a very nice woman whose parents were both deaf - she wasn't. Her parents did the signing/hand communication thing. When they argued their hands moved at 500 MPH - or so I was told.

Fred Mertz  posted on  2015-04-26   22:20:55 ET  Reply   Trace   Private Reply  


#32. To: Lod (#0) (Edited)

Why do there exists Syrian ISIS fighters in the Middle East where ISIS itself is headquartered in the United States specifically Arizona?

Why do parents lie to their kids about Santa Clause and Christmas when these same kids go to school and find out the truth (not from the teachers) about this lie from their own peers?

Why do parents think its "inappropriate" to teach their children about sex at such a young age when their kids will learn about it at school as young as 7?

purplerose  posted on  2015-04-26   22:48:57 ET  Reply   Trace   Private Reply  


#33. To: purplerose (#32)

And that g.d. tooth fairy too!

Fred Mertz  posted on  2015-04-26   23:08:40 ET  Reply   Trace   Private Reply  


#34. To: Lod (#0)

If people evolved from apes, why are there still apes?

Because the guys who replace storefront glass need to make a living?

StraitGate  posted on  2015-04-26   23:22:20 ET  Reply   Trace   Private Reply  


#35. To: Fred Mertz (#33)

And definitely that one too.

purplerose  posted on  2015-04-26   23:58:44 ET  Reply   Trace   Private Reply  


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