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Title: The Most Ridiculous Teen Tragedy Songs (ever)
Source: Flavorwire
URL Source: http://flavorwire.com/549221/the-most-ridiculous-teen-tragedy-songs
Published: Nov 28, 2015
Author: Alison Nastasi
Post Date: 2015-11-28 16:41:00 by Bill D Berger
Keywords: None
Views: 3052
Comments: 49

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The teen tragedy song genre was exactly what it sounds like: pop/rock music that focused on the bittersweet relationship between two young lovers. One of them winds up dead. There were multiple variations of the theme, which was a hit during the 1950s and ‘60s, and contemporary groups have parodied or performed their own versions since then. Today marks the anniversary of one of the most popular teen tragedy tracks, “Leader of the Pack” by The Shangri-Las.

We’re celebrating the dead sweethearts of yore with a look at some of the more ridiculous takes on the genre (although they were all pretty over-the-top). Brace yourself for overwrought lyrics and messages from the grave. Add your favorites to our list, below.

Lucille Ball and Mel Torme, “The Surfboard Came Back By Itself”

Before old fogies wrote think pieces about how terrible kids are these days, they got their jabs in like this. Lucille Ball (and her flaming hair fall) took to the stage of the Lucy Show in 1965 to perform a parody of the teen tragedy genre with Mel “the Velvet Fog” Torme.

3 / 11

Ray Peterson, “Tell Laura I Love Her”

Tommy wants to buy his sweetheart a ring, he enters a drag-car race instead of getting a job like the rest of us. In a morbid move to end all morbid moves, Tommy calls Laura to say his last goodbyes before he even leaves for the race.

4 / 11

Jimmy Cross “I Want My Baby Back”

After a car accident with the “leader of the pack,” a grieving teen resorts to necrophilia since he can’t live without his woman. We think it’s a parody. . . .

5 / 11

Wayne Cochran, “Last Kiss”

“Last Kiss” has a real-life spooky element to go along with its depressing lyrics. Texas record promoter Sonley Roush helped make J. Frank Wilson and the Cavaliers’ version of the 1961 Wayne Cochran song a big hit. While on the road for a concert, Roush fell asleep at the wheel with J. Frank Wilson and others in the car. Roush was killed instantly when he collided head-on with a tractor-trailer.

6 / 11

Bill Anderson, “Candy Apple Red”

A young woman’s dad is the town sheriff. He doesn’t approve of her lead-footed boyfriend, so he sets up a trap on the road to catch him and winds up killing his daughter, too. Oops.

7 / 11

Dickey Lee, “Patches”

A boy’s dad says he can’t marry the unfortunately named Patches, a girl who lives in a nearby shack. A devastated Patches kills herself in the river. When one of the neighbors finds her, Laura Palmer-style, the boy is so distraught he promises to join her later that night. Imagine this tale of suicide at the sock hop.

8 / 11

Dickey Lee, “Laurie (Strange Things Happen)”

Dickey Lee is at it again with a song about dating dead girls. This gem was inspired by a Memphis news report in 1964 that inspired the urban legend about the vanishing hitchhiker. Psychologist turned songwriting creep Milton Addington spotted the article and wrote the track for Lee and his band.

9 / 11

Johnny Cymbal, “The Water Was Red”

What happens when a shark eats your girlfriend? You somehow kill the deadly beast with a puny knife — and then write a song about it.

10 / 11

Roy Orbison, “Leah”

When bae goes diving for pearls to make you a necklace, gets stuck, and drowns. No wonder David Lynch loves Roy Orbison.

11 / 11

Cathy Carroll, “Jimmy Love”

Cathy Carroll fools us by starting “Jimmy Love” as a song about meeting her honey at the altar for their wedding. Then, we realize she’s meeting him at the church for his funeral. In a random turn of events, it turns out Jimmy was hit by a falling tree and died the night before.


Poster Comment:

Here's one more (from 1971) - Timothy and his buddies are trapped in a mine.

When they are rescued, Timothy is no where to be found.

Oh - and who can forget this politically incorrect little ditty?

(1 image)

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#1. To: Bill D Berger (#0) (Edited)

Never let it be said I add nothing to the discussion! :)

"Besides, I was anxious to take the wheel, the man in pink pyjamas showing himself a hopeless duffer at the business." - Marlow

Dakmar  posted on  2015-11-28   16:47:25 ET  Reply   Trace   Private Reply  


#2. To: Bill D Berger (#0)

Lucille Ball and Mel Torme, “The Surfboard Came Back By Itself”

LOL, +1000 points for that! :)

"Besides, I was anxious to take the wheel, the man in pink pyjamas showing himself a hopeless duffer at the business." - Marlow

Dakmar  posted on  2015-11-28   16:49:33 ET  Reply   Trace   Private Reply  


#3. To: Bill D Berger (#0)

How much fun is that?

"Besides, I was anxious to take the wheel, the man in pink pyjamas showing himself a hopeless duffer at the business." - Marlow

Dakmar  posted on  2015-11-28   17:00:58 ET  Reply   Trace   Private Reply  


#4. To: Dakmar (#3) (Edited)

First time I've ever even heard that one.

So Joey knocked up Jule and dad was pissed and killed her instead.

That's sad.

I did some digging and found out that the girl singing was 15-year-old Paula Vance, daughter of Paul Vance, the guy who wrote the lyrics.

Alternate text if image doesn't load

He also wrote the lyrics to "Itsy Bitsy Teeny Weeny Yellow Polka Dot Bikini," a 1960 hit for Brian Hyland. Vance was inspired to write the lyrics after watching his two-year old daughter, Paula.

During times of universal deceit, telling the truth becomes a revolutionary act.

Bill D Berger  posted on  2015-11-28   17:09:10 ET  (1 image) Reply   Trace   Private Reply  


#5. To: Dakmar (#3)

“The most dangerous man to any government is the man who is able to think things out... without regard to the prevailing superstitions and taboos. Almost inevitably he comes to the conclusion that the government he lives under is dishonest, insane, intolerable.” ~ H. L. Mencken

Lod  posted on  2015-11-28   17:11:20 ET  Reply   Trace   Private Reply  


#6. To: Bill D Berger (#4)

tragic :)

"Besides, I was anxious to take the wheel, the man in pink pyjamas showing himself a hopeless duffer at the business." - Marlow

Dakmar  posted on  2015-11-28   17:11:40 ET  Reply   Trace   Private Reply  


#7. To: Bill D Berger (#0) (Edited)

Timothy

Not exactly "teen tragedy", but spooky:

best I can tell, it's about an older brother that died in an accident and the younger siblings are trying to put the pieces together because their parents don't want to talk about him.

"Besides, I was anxious to take the wheel, the man in pink pyjamas showing himself a hopeless duffer at the business." - Marlow

Dakmar  posted on  2015-11-28   17:15:39 ET  Reply   Trace   Private Reply  


#8. To: All (#5)

15 most depressing songs of the 60/70s

flashbak.com/the-15-most-...f-the-1960s-and-70s-7267/

“The most dangerous man to any government is the man who is able to think things out... without regard to the prevailing superstitions and taboos. Almost inevitably he comes to the conclusion that the government he lives under is dishonest, insane, intolerable.” ~ H. L. Mencken

Lod  posted on  2015-11-28   17:20:12 ET  Reply   Trace   Private Reply  


#9. To: All (#8)

“The most dangerous man to any government is the man who is able to think things out... without regard to the prevailing superstitions and taboos. Almost inevitably he comes to the conclusion that the government he lives under is dishonest, insane, intolerable.” ~ H. L. Mencken

Lod  posted on  2015-11-28   17:24:38 ET  Reply   Trace   Private Reply  


#10. To: Bill D Berger (#4)

I did some digging and found out that the girl singing was 15-year-old Paula Vance, daughter of Paul Vance, the guy who wrote the lyrics.

Damn, and I was ready to go all in it was Moon Unit Zappa.

"Besides, I was anxious to take the wheel, the man in pink pyjamas showing himself a hopeless duffer at the business." - Marlow

Dakmar  posted on  2015-11-28   17:27:48 ET  Reply   Trace   Private Reply  


#11. To: Lod (#9)

Roses Are Red

LOL, I should start a Goodfellows catchement thread for all that (doo)Wop crap.

"Besides, I was anxious to take the wheel, the man in pink pyjamas showing himself a hopeless duffer at the business." - Marlow

Dakmar  posted on  2015-11-28   17:30:09 ET  Reply   Trace   Private Reply  


#12. To: Lod (#8)

15 most depressing songs of the 60/70s

I gotta admit, this one hits close to home.

During times of universal deceit, telling the truth becomes a revolutionary act.

Bill D Berger  posted on  2015-11-28   17:33:56 ET  Reply   Trace   Private Reply  


#13. To: Bill D Berger (#12)

The time passes by too quickly to appreciate what else is passing us by.

“The most dangerous man to any government is the man who is able to think things out... without regard to the prevailing superstitions and taboos. Almost inevitably he comes to the conclusion that the government he lives under is dishonest, insane, intolerable.” ~ H. L. Mencken

Lod  posted on  2015-11-28   17:38:42 ET  Reply   Trace   Private Reply  


#14. To: Bill D Berger, Lod (#12)

Chapin weren't no teenie!

"Besides, I was anxious to take the wheel, the man in pink pyjamas showing himself a hopeless duffer at the business." - Marlow

Dakmar  posted on  2015-11-28   17:40:16 ET  Reply   Trace   Private Reply  


#15. To: All (#13)

“The most dangerous man to any government is the man who is able to think things out... without regard to the prevailing superstitions and taboos. Almost inevitably he comes to the conclusion that the government he lives under is dishonest, insane, intolerable.” ~ H. L. Mencken

Lod  posted on  2015-11-28   17:42:24 ET  Reply   Trace   Private Reply  


#16. To: All (#15)

“The most dangerous man to any government is the man who is able to think things out... without regard to the prevailing superstitions and taboos. Almost inevitably he comes to the conclusion that the government he lives under is dishonest, insane, intolerable.” ~ H. L. Mencken

Lod  posted on  2015-11-28   17:46:11 ET  Reply   Trace   Private Reply  


#17. To: Lod (#15) (Edited)

Crank it up loud my brothers and sisters!

"Besides, I was anxious to take the wheel, the man in pink pyjamas showing himself a hopeless duffer at the business." - Marlow

Dakmar  posted on  2015-11-28   17:47:37 ET  Reply   Trace   Private Reply  


#18. To: Dakmar (#17)

“The most dangerous man to any government is the man who is able to think things out... without regard to the prevailing superstitions and taboos. Almost inevitably he comes to the conclusion that the government he lives under is dishonest, insane, intolerable.” ~ H. L. Mencken

Lod  posted on  2015-11-28   17:53:47 ET  Reply   Trace   Private Reply  


#19. To: All (#18)

swerving from topic

“The most dangerous man to any government is the man who is able to think things out... without regard to the prevailing superstitions and taboos. Almost inevitably he comes to the conclusion that the government he lives under is dishonest, insane, intolerable.” ~ H. L. Mencken

Lod  posted on  2015-11-28   17:57:42 ET  Reply   Trace   Private Reply  


#20. To: Lod, Bill B Berger (#18)

Welcome to another episode of preteen tragedy theater

"Besides, I was anxious to take the wheel, the man in pink pyjamas showing himself a hopeless duffer at the business." - Marlow

Dakmar  posted on  2015-11-28   17:58:21 ET  Reply   Trace   Private Reply  


#21. To: Lod (#19) (Edited)

swerving from topic

Shame on you, stick to the topic!

"Besides, I was anxious to take the wheel, the man in pink pyjamas showing himself a hopeless duffer at the business." - Marlow

Dakmar  posted on  2015-11-28   18:04:30 ET  Reply   Trace   Private Reply  


#22. To: Dakmar (#21)

“The most dangerous man to any government is the man who is able to think things out... without regard to the prevailing superstitions and taboos. Almost inevitably he comes to the conclusion that the government he lives under is dishonest, insane, intolerable.” ~ H. L. Mencken

Lod  posted on  2015-11-28   18:10:25 ET  Reply   Trace   Private Reply  


#23. To: Lod (#22) (Edited)

I never realized how cool Vicky Lawrence was back when she was paired up with Tim Conway.

"Besides, I was anxious to take the wheel, the man in pink pyjamas showing himself a hopeless duffer at the business." - Marlow

Dakmar  posted on  2015-11-28   18:12:06 ET  Reply   Trace   Private Reply  


#24. To: Dakmar (#23)

They're a pair, for sure!

“The most dangerous man to any government is the man who is able to think things out... without regard to the prevailing superstitions and taboos. Almost inevitably he comes to the conclusion that the government he lives under is dishonest, insane, intolerable.” ~ H. L. Mencken

Lod  posted on  2015-11-28   18:15:19 ET  Reply   Trace   Private Reply  


#25. To: Lod (#24)

So you'll send me 12 cents just for turning you on to Jeff Beck Group?

"Besides, I was anxious to take the wheel, the man in pink pyjamas showing himself a hopeless duffer at the business." - Marlow

Dakmar  posted on  2015-11-28   18:37:20 ET  Reply   Trace   Private Reply  


#26. To: Lod (#8)

I was surprised Dr. Hook's "Sylvia's Mother" didn't make the list.

Obnoxicated  posted on  2015-11-28   18:41:41 ET  Reply   Trace   Private Reply  


#27. To: Dakmar (#25)

No, JB never really worked for me except for a couple of their hits.

(Which don't come to mind at the moment)

“The most dangerous man to any government is the man who is able to think things out... without regard to the prevailing superstitions and taboos. Almost inevitably he comes to the conclusion that the government he lives under is dishonest, insane, intolerable.” ~ H. L. Mencken

Lod  posted on  2015-11-28   18:42:58 ET  Reply   Trace   Private Reply  


#28. To: Obnoxicated (#26)

I was off into C&W when Hook came on the scene.

“The most dangerous man to any government is the man who is able to think things out... without regard to the prevailing superstitions and taboos. Almost inevitably he comes to the conclusion that the government he lives under is dishonest, insane, intolerable.” ~ H. L. Mencken

Lod  posted on  2015-11-28   18:44:29 ET  Reply   Trace   Private Reply  


#29. To: Obnoxicated (#26)

Sylvia's Mother

Yikles, that rings a bell

Send me a dollar and I'll prevent some measurable amount of child abuse. Stamps, hells yes stamps are fun.

"Besides, I was anxious to take the wheel, the man in pink pyjamas showing himself a hopeless duffer at the business." - Marlow

Dakmar  posted on  2015-11-28   18:46:02 ET  Reply   Trace   Private Reply  


#30. To: Lod (#27)

"Besides, I was anxious to take the wheel, the man in pink pyjamas showing himself a hopeless duffer at the business." - Marlow

Dakmar  posted on  2015-11-28   18:52:14 ET  Reply   Trace   Private Reply  


#31. To: Lod (#28)

Yeah, that was right around the time everybody was moving from Saturday Night Fever to Urban Cowboy, wasn't it? :p

Obnoxicated  posted on  2015-11-28   18:57:20 ET  Reply   Trace   Private Reply  


#32. To: Dakmar (#29)

let's get back to nearly on topic

“The most dangerous man to any government is the man who is able to think things out... without regard to the prevailing superstitions and taboos. Almost inevitably he comes to the conclusion that the government he lives under is dishonest, insane, intolerable.” ~ H. L. Mencken

Lod  posted on  2015-11-28   18:57:47 ET  Reply   Trace   Private Reply  


#33. To: Obnoxicated (#31)

Both Travolta and both great entertainment films, imo. It was a good transition for me.

“The most dangerous man to any government is the man who is able to think things out... without regard to the prevailing superstitions and taboos. Almost inevitably he comes to the conclusion that the government he lives under is dishonest, insane, intolerable.” ~ H. L. Mencken

Lod  posted on  2015-11-28   18:59:40 ET  Reply   Trace   Private Reply  


#34. To: Lod (#32) (Edited)

let's get back to nearly on topic

Of course...which was? :)

here's something I hope you'll really like! :)

"Besides, I was anxious to take the wheel, the man in pink pyjamas showing himself a hopeless duffer at the business." - Marlow

Dakmar  posted on  2015-11-28   19:08:48 ET  Reply   Trace   Private Reply  


#35. To: Dakmar (#34)

Cool! thanks.

(Don't let algore see that coal-burner though.)

“The most dangerous man to any government is the man who is able to think things out... without regard to the prevailing superstitions and taboos. Almost inevitably he comes to the conclusion that the government he lives under is dishonest, insane, intolerable.” ~ H. L. Mencken

Lod  posted on  2015-11-28   19:16:52 ET  Reply   Trace   Private Reply  


#36. To: Lod (#35)

I've got The Fear again, g'nite.

"Besides, I was anxious to take the wheel, the man in pink pyjamas showing himself a hopeless duffer at the business." - Marlow

Dakmar  posted on  2015-11-28   19:39:26 ET  Reply   Trace   Private Reply  


#37. To: Dakmar (#36)

Nite - don't let the kissing bugs bite.

“The most dangerous man to any government is the man who is able to think things out... without regard to the prevailing superstitions and taboos. Almost inevitably he comes to the conclusion that the government he lives under is dishonest, insane, intolerable.” ~ H. L. Mencken

Lod  posted on  2015-11-28   20:06:27 ET  Reply   Trace   Private Reply  


#38. To: Lod (#37)

So it's come down to who I have to vote for in 2016?

I'm a helpless cripple, suddenly offended by Trump's spaz act?

Or Hillary...patronizing...

Pick one, Lod! :)

"Besides, I was anxious to take the wheel, the man in pink pyjamas showing himself a hopeless duffer at the business." - Marlow

Dakmar  posted on  2015-11-28   20:13:16 ET  Reply   Trace   Private Reply  


#39. To: Dakmar (#38)

I'm still with Trump 'till they kill him.

“The most dangerous man to any government is the man who is able to think things out... without regard to the prevailing superstitions and taboos. Almost inevitably he comes to the conclusion that the government he lives under is dishonest, insane, intolerable.” ~ H. L. Mencken

Lod  posted on  2015-11-28   20:52:43 ET  Reply   Trace   Private Reply  


#40. To: Lod (#39)

Good call, that's where I'm at too. I'd hate to see The Donald jump out of a cake Oct 2016 shouting What were you idjits thinks voting for me, at which point I guess I'd have to stomp the bald little fuck, but I hope it doesn't come to that, eh?

"Besides, I was anxious to take the wheel, the man in pink pyjamas showing himself a hopeless duffer at the business." - Marlow

Dakmar  posted on  2015-11-28   20:59:45 ET  Reply   Trace   Private Reply  



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