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Title: 4 Poll: Is masturbation sex?
Source: 4
URL Source: http://www.freedom4um.com
Published: Sep 5, 2006
Author: 4 poll
Post Date: 2006-09-05 20:57:32 by Zipporah
Keywords: None
Views: 7786
Comments: 88

Okay this may sound well.. ahem a bit odd.. BUT here goes:

Is masturbation sex?

Yes ___

No ___


Poster Comment:

Ahem.. I was conflicted as to what the category should be but what the heck :P

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Comments (1-48) not displayed.
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#49. To: Uncle Bill (#25)

"Between 95 and 98 percent of all boys engage in this practice(masturbation) — and the rest have been known to lie."

Why do 14 year old boys masturbate?

Practice for when they get married.

tosh  posted on  2006-09-06   0:09:42 ET  Reply   Trace   Private Reply  


#50. To: Zipporah (#0)

God I hope so, because for some people, it's the only sex they'll ever get.

What's that Mr. Nipples? You want me to ask the nice lady about her rack?.

TommyTheMadArtist  posted on  2006-09-06   0:10:26 ET  Reply   Trace   Private Reply  


#51. To: Rabble Rouser (#46)

i am amazed guys have so many words for it:

slam the ham
beat the meat
flog the dog
choke the chicken
polish the knob
etc.

there are about 100 more but i can't think of them now.

Morgana le Fay  posted on  2006-09-06   0:17:16 ET  Reply   Trace   Private Reply  


#52. To: Morgana le Fay (#51)

slam the ham beat the meat flog the dog choke the chicken polish the knob etc.

??????????????????????

Are you researching for a thesis? I got to get out more I guess.

tom007  posted on  2006-09-06   0:23:25 ET  Reply   Trace   Private Reply  


#53. To: Zipporah (#0)

Is masturbation sex?

That depends.

If you're hung like TLBSHOW, it's a comedy.

If you're hung like Fred Mertz, then it's a matinée. Entrance is in the rear.

If you do it to vent, then it's therapy.

If you're AKA Stone, it's a sin and we'll all burn in Hell.

If you're Fahey, it's because the lady boy said, "no".

If you're a woman, I'm an instructor.

It also depends on who you think about while doing it. Can it be considered group sex if you think about multiple people?

For me, it was just a way to gain enrollment at the Braille Institute.

"Life is tough. Life is tougher if you're stupid." - John Wayne
"The ignorance of one voter in a democracy impairs the security of all." - John F. Kennedy

82Marine89  posted on  2006-09-06   0:51:31 ET  Reply   Trace   Private Reply  


#54. To: Morgana le Fay (#51)

i am amazed guys have so many words for it:

What do girls call what they do? hehehe

Do I hear a fat lady singing?

Critter  posted on  2006-09-06   0:54:17 ET  Reply   Trace   Private Reply  


#55. To: 82Marine89 (#53)

For me, it was just a way to gain enrollment at the Braille Institute.

Were you accepted or rejected? ;0)

"Never has so much military and economic and diplomatic power been used so ineffectively, and if after all of this time, and all of this sacrifice, and all of this support, there is still no end in sight, then I say the time has come for the American people to turn to new leadership not tied to the mistakes and policies of the past." Richard M. Nixon

BTP Holdings  posted on  2006-09-06   0:56:13 ET  Reply   Trace   Private Reply  


#56. To: Critter (#54)

"What do girls call what they do? hehehe"

Supporting your local soft glass crafter in buying his alibi items he has to keep the Ashcrofts of the world out of his glass pipe trade perhaps?

Ferret Mike  posted on  2006-09-06   0:58:01 ET  (1 image) Reply   Trace   Private Reply  


#57. To: BTP Holdings (#55)

I'm going to graduate with honors. [:{)

"Life is tough. Life is tougher if you're stupid." - John Wayne
"The ignorance of one voter in a democracy impairs the security of all." - John F. Kennedy

82Marine89  posted on  2006-09-06   0:58:02 ET  Reply   Trace   Private Reply  


#58. To: 82Marine89 (#53)

If you're hung like TLBSHOW, it's a comedy.

If you're hung like Fred Mertz, then it's a matinée.

You been peeking in their showers again marine?

Do I hear a fat lady singing?

Critter  posted on  2006-09-06   0:58:03 ET  Reply   Trace   Private Reply  


#59. To: Critter (#54)

What do girls call what they do? hehehe

THEY NEVER DO. AND THEY DON'T POOP EITHER. (They might pee every now and then, but it's really not their fault).

Whatever you do , do not let them into the house if you have new carpet, they will wreck it in no time.

tom007  posted on  2006-09-06   1:00:26 ET  Reply   Trace   Private Reply  


#60. To: tom007 (#59)

They don't fart and they don't burp. Therefore, they bitch, or they will explode.

Do I hear a fat lady singing?

Critter  posted on  2006-09-06   1:02:57 ET  Reply   Trace   Private Reply  


#61. To: Zipporah (#0)

Is masturbation sex?

Nothing like coming home from a hard day at work throwing a DVD in and FF to Lili von Shtupp and..... Hey! I'm I the only one with Blazing Saddles on DVD?

I'm not ready to make nice

Hmmmmm  posted on  2006-09-06   1:03:29 ET  Reply   Trace   Private Reply  


#62. To: All, zipporah (#59)

Whatever you do , do not let them into the house if you have new carpet, they will wreck it in no time.

Please don't ban me. I take it all back. I have ruined more carpet than.....

tom007  posted on  2006-09-06   1:06:25 ET  Reply   Trace   Private Reply  


#63. To: tom007 (#52)

slam the ham beat the meat flog the dog choke the chicken polish the knob etc.

??????????????????????

tickle the baby leg

Morgana le Fay  posted on  2006-09-06   1:14:26 ET  Reply   Trace   Private Reply  


#64. To: Hmmmmm (#61)

FF to Lili von Shtupp and

FF? Dare I ask? lol

Do I hear a fat lady singing?

Critter  posted on  2006-09-06   1:17:00 ET  Reply   Trace   Private Reply  


#65. To: Morgana le Fay (#63)

*click*click*click*click*click*click*click*click(Why you can't have troops to to combat with double Prince Albert piercings) *click*click*click*click*click*click*click*click

Ferret Mike  posted on  2006-09-06   1:18:02 ET  Reply   Trace   Private Reply  


#66. To: Ferret Mike (#65)

*click*click*click*click*click*click*click*click(Why you can't have troops to to combat with double Prince Albert piercings)

ok. i am naive. could you explain this?

Morgana le Fay  posted on  2006-09-06   1:22:21 ET  Reply   Trace   Private Reply  


#67. To: Zipporah (#0)

These days you can't be too careful. Unfortunatly I don't know who I've been with.

I'm not ready to make nice

Hmmmmm  posted on  2006-09-06   1:25:12 ET  Reply   Trace   Private Reply  


#68. To: Hmmmmm (#67)

These days you can't be too careful. Unfortunatly I don't know who I've been with.

(still laughing, and I have no other comment)

"If there’s another 9/11 or a major war in the Middle-East involving a U.S. attack on Iran, I have no doubt that there will be, the day after or within days an equivalent of a Reichstag fire decree that will involve massive detentions in this country."

- Daniel Ellsberg Author, Pentagon Papers

robin  posted on  2006-09-06   1:40:36 ET  Reply   Trace   Private Reply  


#69. To: Morgana le Fay (#63)

tickle the baby leg

Pound the Potato

Minerva  posted on  2006-09-06   1:40:40 ET  Reply   Trace   Private Reply  


#70. To: Morgana le Fay (#66)

"ok. i am naive. could you explain this?"

A double Prince Albert is two rings through the opening in a penis. It not only rattles when the owner rocks it, they usually have to sit to pee with that piercing too..

Ferret Mike  posted on  2006-09-06   1:46:08 ET  Reply   Trace   Private Reply  


#71. To: Morgana le Fay (#66)

Google 'prince albert piercing', I think I'll skip posting a picture of that.

Ferret Mike  posted on  2006-09-06   1:51:54 ET  Reply   Trace   Private Reply  


#72. To: Ferret Mike (#71)

i will take your word for it.

Morgana le Fay  posted on  2006-09-06   2:03:24 ET  Reply   Trace   Private Reply  


#73. To: Ferret Mike (#70)

Yuck!

Minerva  posted on  2006-09-06   2:17:02 ET  Reply   Trace   Private Reply  


#74. To: Morgana le Fay (#72)

"i will take your word for it."

A wise Idea. It is hard enough to look at the owner's large head two, as usually they have more holes in that then nature intended as well.

The owners of such decorations say it enhances the sensation, but I think they jut want to pull our legs too.

Ferret Mike  posted on  2006-09-06   2:42:17 ET  Reply   Trace   Private Reply  


#75. To: Minerva (#73) (Edited)

Stone keeping busy after he realizes it doesn't actually talk to him.

Ferret Mike  posted on  2006-09-06   3:01:48 ET  Reply   Trace   Private Reply  


#76. To: Zipporah (#0)

Is masturbation sex?

May I ask exactly what prompted this question?

(Or is it safer not to ask?)

Pinguinite.com

Neil McIver  posted on  2006-09-06   3:20:37 ET  Reply   Trace   Private Reply  


#77. To: Neil McIver (#76)

Wild guess Neil, but I do believe they are lampooning this forum's tone:

Terrorist won't be the death of America but Porn & Sexual Americans will

Ferret Mike  posted on  2006-09-06   3:26:54 ET  Reply   Trace   Private Reply  


#78. To: 82Marine89 (#57)

Watch, Fred Mertz fashion jeans

Ferret Mike  posted on  2006-09-06   3:38:04 ET  Reply   Trace   Private Reply  


#79. To: 82Marine89 (#57)

Fred Mertz's presentation he gave at graduation from the Acme school for forum posting.

Ferret Mike  posted on  2006-09-06   3:42:31 ET  Reply   Trace   Private Reply  


#80. To: Critter (#33)

I was 12 years old, in 6th grade, when the school nurse said I might need glasses

I was in the fourth grade, but then, I was precocious.

"Anyone who has the power to make you believe absurdities also has the power to make you commit atrocities." — Voltaire (1694-1778)

YertleTurtle  posted on  2006-09-06   6:04:44 ET  Reply   Trace   Private Reply  


#81. To: Jethro Tull (#14)

Are we talking solo, together with a lover, a loser at a computer terminal with one hand in his trousers and the other in the pretzel bag?

I thought we weren't going to talk about Badeye on this site...

the law, in its majestic equality, forbids the rich as well as the poor to sleep under bridges, beg in the streets and steal bread.

bluedogtxn  posted on  2006-09-06   9:07:04 ET  Reply   Trace   Private Reply  


#82. To: bluedogtxn (#81) (Edited)

Self gratification in a Hummer - parked by a schoolyard - is NOT sex and should remain a class B felony.

Jethro Tull  posted on  2006-09-06   9:12:35 ET  Reply   Trace   Private Reply  


#83. To: 82Marine89 (#53)

LOL! .. well..No comment on some of this :P

Hmm guess you'll be reallllllly good at blind man's bluff?? :P

Zipporah  posted on  2006-09-06   19:28:25 ET  Reply   Trace   Private Reply  


#84. To: Zipporah (#0)

Is masturbation sex?

No.



***LEAP***
"To educate a man in mind and not morals is to create a menace to society."
--Theodore Roosevelt
"I tell you, freedom and human rights in America are doomed. The U.S. Government will lead the American people, and the West in general, into an unbearable hell and choking life.
-- Osama bin Laden
"A prohibition law strikes at the very principles upon which our govt was founded."
- Lincoln
All our liberties are due to men who, when their conscience has compelled them, have broken the laws of the land.
--William K Clifford

IndieTX  posted on  2006-09-06   19:42:32 ET  Reply   Trace   Private Reply  


#85. To: IndieTX (#84)

Hey I think that is the majority opinion..

Zipporah  posted on  2006-09-06   19:46:40 ET  Reply   Trace   Private Reply  


#86. To: Zipporah (#85) (Edited)

DIVINYLS, courtesy of AUSTIN POWERS

I love myself I want you to love me

When I feel down I want you above me

I search myself I want you to find me

forget myself I want you to remind me

I dont want anybody else

When I think about you I touch myself

Ooh I dont want anybody else oh no, oh no, oh no

Youre the one who makes me come running

Youre the sun who makes me shine

When youre around Im always laughing

I want to make you mine

I close my eyes and see you before me

Think I would die if you were to ignore me

A fool could see just how much I adore you

I get down on my knees I do anything for you

I dont want anybody else

When I think about you I touch myself

Ooh I dont want anybody else

Oh no, oh no, oh no

I want you I dont want anybody else

And when I think about you I touch myself < p> Ooh, ooh, oo, oo ahh

I dont want anybody else when I think about you

I touch myself ooh I dont want anybody else

Oh no, oh no, oh no

"Anyone who has the power to make you believe absurdities also has the power to make you commit atrocities." — Voltaire (1694-1778)

YertleTurtle  posted on  2006-09-06   22:28:12 ET  Reply   Trace   Private Reply  


#87. To: YertleTurtle (#86)

Zipporah  posted on  2006-09-06   22:30:20 ET  Reply   Trace   Private Reply  


#88. To: YertleTurtle (#86)

Zipporah  posted on  2006-09-06   22:35:32 ET  Reply   Trace   Private Reply  


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