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Latest Articles: 4play
Dream Weaver
Post Date: 2008-02-24 18:48:08 by James Deffenbach
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Riley
Post Date: 2008-02-24 16:05:01 by richard9151
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Tiff With Riley ''My God! What happened to you?'' the bartender asked Kelly as he hobbled in on a crutch, one arm in a cast. ''I got in a tiff with Riley.'' ''Riley? He's just a wee fellow,'' the barkeep said, surprised. ''He must have had something in his hand.'' ''That he did,'' Kelly said. ''A shovel it was.'' ''Dear Lord. Didn't you have anything in your hand?'' ''Aye, that I did -- Mrs. Riley's left boob.'' Kelly said. ''And a beautiful thing it was, but not much use in a fight.''
George Carlin's Views on Aging (great stuff)
Post Date: 2008-02-24 09:30:02 by Jethro Tull
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George Carlin on age. IF YOU DON'T READ THIS TO THE VERY END, YOU HAVE LOST A DAY IN YOUR LIFE. AND WHEN YOU HAVE FINISHED, DO AS I AM DOING AND SEND IT ON. 33; George Carlin's Views on Aging Do you realize that the only time in our lives when we like to get old is when we're kids? If you're less than 10 years old, you're so excited about aging that you think in fractions. "How old are you?" " I'm four and a half!" You're never thirty-six and a half. You're four and a half, going on five! That's the key You get into your teens, now they can't hold you back. You jump to the next number, or even a few ahead. "How ...
What's Really in Spam?
Post Date: 2008-02-23 17:05:38 by YertleTurtle
3 Comments
Dear Cecil: We've been having a heated discussion in the office, and we need to know how Spam luncheon meat is really made. Also, how come they never released a chicken or turkey version (i.e., Spurkey or Spicken)? Finally, what is Monty Python's true relationship with Spam? --Steve Tolin, Sudbury, Ontario Dear Steve: In the interest of thoroughness I thought that somebody here at Dopecorp should actually eat some Spam before we wrote about it. You'd think I was asking these guys to throw themselves on a grenade. "Cecil, I ate a damn Circus Peanut," wailed my assistant Jane. "I did laundry. Hell, I even sniffed out sperm trees. This is where I draw the ...
One of my favorite movies of all time
Post Date: 2008-02-23 16:30:10 by YertleTurtle
3 Comments
Poster Comment:ARRRRGH!!!
Montagues & Capulets
Post Date: 2008-02-22 21:26:55 by Dakmar
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Montagues & Capulets
US DESTROYS SPACE PEACE, ER PIECE OF SPACE JUNK
Post Date: 2008-02-22 19:14:35 by robin
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US missile destroys peace in space er I mean broken space satellite- Spying on everyone protects us from you, say evil planet owners- In the UK - MI6 evidence at Diana inquest - our secret killers didnt kill anyone - Hello well informed dog meat , welcome to the fkn news , Im defying gravity here are tonights headlies Click for Video!
Thousand hand bodhisattva
Post Date: 2008-02-21 23:19:03 by Horse
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Poster Comment:Other versions of this have been posted before but the Reuters link below shows how these deaf dancers train. http://www.reuters.com/news/video?videoId=76519&videoChannel=1
Here are some true tales of people who put the duh in induhvidual.
Post Date: 2008-02-21 20:58:26 by richard9151
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"Locally we have a grocery chain called Bi-Lo. We were sitting around the office one day talking about living on farms and drinking milk from the cows. One girl said she wouldn't drink milk from a cow, only milk from Bi-Lo. The stunned silence was deafening." "We were given our yearly evaluations and handed our objectives for the upcoming year: "Everyone must exceed the Team Average in sales dollars." My boss explained that this was not a case of exceeding a previous average; all ten of us were expected to be above whatever our current average was." "My business partner and his wife were traveling out west and decided to visit Hoover Dam. As they ...
McCain as the Bipartisan Maveric
Post Date: 2008-02-21 20:16:32 by a vast rightwing conspirator
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Finally, we have positive proof of McCain's perfect bipartisanship and his maveric nature. McCain says: 1 - "I did not bang that woman... what's her name?" 2 - "I am not a crook" I totally rest my case.
The Insanity of "Grampa Dave"
Post Date: 2008-02-21 10:35:37 by James Deffenbach
9 Comments
To: onyx; Mo1; Jim Robinson; EdReform; Buckhead; Howlin Our two most important blessings are our two grandchildren. On their birthdays and at Christmas we make donations to their college funds. To make sure that a strong America is still here for them in their future, I donate a $/Day to Free Republic. As I have told Jim and others before, that is my daily insurance donation to make sure we have a strong America for our sons and Grandchildren. If Buckhead and Howlin hadn't exposed the lies by Blather and Mapes just before the 2004 election, Jon Carry would have been our president, I would have been shot, and my grandaughter would be wearing a Blue Burka.* If there had been no Free ...
James Gregory on Animal Rights (funny stuff)
Post Date: 2008-02-20 16:29:31 by James Deffenbach
3 Comments
James Gregory, dubbed "the funniest man in America," has been performing home-spun comedy to sold-out crowds for over 20 years. Delivering common-sense wisdom, old-fashioned values and politically incorrect humor, Gregory is known for inspiring fanatic devotion, whether it's the first or fifth visit.
Farmer and the Cow
Post Date: 2008-02-20 13:27:15 by richard9151
6 Comments
Farmer and the Cow A farmer was in a bar drinking and looking all depressed. His friend asked him why he was looking depressed and he replied, "Some things you just can't explain. This morning I was outside milking. As soon as the bucket was full the cow kicked it down with his left foot so I tied up his left foot to a pole. I began to fill up the bucket again and he kicked it down with his right foot, so I tied his right to a pole too. As soon as I finished milkin'' him again he knocked down the bucket with his with his tail and I took off my belt and tied up his tail with my belt. As I was tying up his tail, my pants dropped down, then my wife came out and well, ...
Tokyo marathon runner solves mystery of sore nipples
Post Date: 2008-02-20 04:02:47 by mirage
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TOKYO (Reuters Life!) - Choking pollution and sapping heat will be the major concerns for the world's elite marathon runners at this year's Beijing Olympics. But for millions of other marathon men and women, concerns are of an altogether more painful nature. After his first assault at a marathon last year banker Brian Jones was shocked to discover the sharp pain in his chest was not cardiovascular, but bleeding nipples. "When I took my shirt off at the end it was white -- apart from two particular parts of it," he told Reuters in an interview after completing his second Tokyo Marathon at the weekend. "It looked like I had been shot by a sniper. This year I bought ...
Mike Huckabee Tribute Video, Now Featuring Dinosaurs!
Post Date: 2008-02-19 21:26:40 by robin
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Just in time for Mike Huckabee to lose the Wisconsin primary and every other primary or caucus yet to come (except maybe Texas!), here is another “Obama girl” knockoff video featuring some gal twirling around and singing about her crush on a presidential candidate. It’s 80% dull liberal mockery of religious people and 20% awesome dinosaur riding. [YouTube]
The Wrong Way
Post Date: 2008-02-18 17:35:45 by richard9151
3 Comments
The Wrong Way As a senior citizen was driving down the freeway, his cell phone rang. Answering, he heard his wife's voice urgently warning him, "Jethro, I just heard on the news that there''s a car going the wrong way on Route 280. Please be careful!" "It's not just one car," said Jethro, "It's hundreds of them!"
Stuff White People Like
Post Date: 2008-02-18 04:51:34 by YertleTurtle
2 Comments
White people spend a lot of time of worrying about poor people. It takes up a pretty significant portion of their day. They feel guilty and sad that poor people shop at Wal*Mart instead of Whole Foods, that they vote Republican instead of Democratic, that they go to Community College/get a job instead of studying art at a University. It is a poorly guarded secret that, deep down, white people believe if given money and education that all poor people would be EXACTLY like them. In fact, the only reason that poor people make the choices they do is because they have not been given the means to make the right choices and care about the right things. A great way to make white people feel good ...
The 50 best love songs of the '80s
Post Date: 2008-02-18 01:10:19 by christine
7 Comments
www.telegraph.co.uk/arts/...2008/02/14/bmtop50114.xml
The Blue Pigeon
Post Date: 2008-02-17 23:30:26 by christine
3 Comments
The mayor of Phoenix was very worried about a plague of pigeons in Phoenix. He could not remove the pigeons from the city. All of Phoenix was full of pigeon poop, the people of Phoenix could not walk on the sidewalks, or drive on the roads. It was costing a fortune to keep the streets and sidewalks clean. One day a man came to City Hall and offered the Mayor a proposition. "I can rid your beautiful city of its plague of pigeons without any cost But, you must promise not to ask me any questions. Or, you can pay me one million dollars to ask one question." The mayor considered the offer briefly and accepted the free proposition. The next day the man climbed to the top of City ...
Manly Skeet Shooting
Post Date: 2008-02-17 15:11:06 by Lod
4 Comments
The George W. Bush Presidential Library
Post Date: 2008-02-17 11:46:04 by Horse
5 Comments
The George W. Bush Presidential Library is now in the planning stages. You'll want to be the first at your corporation to make a contribution to this great man's legacy. The Library will include: The Hurricane Katrina Room, which is still under construction. The Alberto Gonzales Room, where you can't remember anything. The Texas Air National Guard Room, where you don't have to even show up. The Walter Reed Hospital Room, where they don't let you in. The Guantanamo Bay Room, where they don't let you out. The Weapons of Mass Destruction Room (which no one has been able to find). The Iraq War Room. After you complete your first tour, they make you to go back for ...
Ten Jobs That Pay $30 an Hour
Post Date: 2008-02-16 18:15:22 by YertleTurtle
18 Comments
Remember when you got your first job and realized one movie ticket was equal to one hour of work or that a pair of shoes was an entire workday? Somewhere along the way, many of us stopped looking at our paychecks as units of time and started focusing on how much we deposit in the bank. If you haven’t calculated your hourly pay in a while, now might be a good time crunch some numbers and see what you’re bringing home each day. The median household salary is $48,201, according to the 2006 U.S. Census Bureau report. This makes the average hourly rate $23.17 based on a 40-hour workweek. We’ve made a list of the top 20 jobs that earn $30 per hour, along with their median annual ...
FUNNY! ~~ Cop & Wife OD On Brownies From Confiscated Pot ~~
Post Date: 2008-02-16 16:11:34 by angle
4 Comments
Lewis Black - Time For A Dead President
Post Date: 2008-02-16 14:24:07 by robin
4 Comments
Lewis Black - Time For A Dead President | Funny Jokes at JibJab
Click for Video!
Sheryl Crow Everyday is a Winding Road
Post Date: 2008-02-16 13:32:20 by Peppa
2 Comments
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