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Latest Articles: 4play
Bad News About Turtle's Johnson Rod
Post Date: 2009-07-23 18:29:35 by Turtle
5 Comments
First my mechanic told me my Johnson rod was broken and couldn't be fixed. Then the doctor told me the same thing. Sometimes life throws you double-whammies.
Online names still up for grabs.....
Post Date: 2009-07-21 21:41:40 by X-15
14 Comments
Starting off, we momentarily had Nigger Jim. Pussy_Galore, HepCat, Cheech, Chong, ThaiStix, moldy_gym_socks, postnasaldrip, heartbreak-of-psoriasis, Clintons-condom, 3/4-racecam, Hitler's_rabbi...
How to get to Heaven from Ireland - ( "It's a Curious Race, Da Irish")
Post Date: 2009-07-19 13:35:23 by Jethro Tull
0 Comments
"It's a Curious Race, Da IRISH." Oscar Wilde If you have Irish friends and you're having a bit of a challenge understanding their ways, this little story might help. How to get to Heaven from Ireland I was testing children in my Dublin Sunday school class to see if they understood the concept of getting to heaven. I asked them, 'If I sold my house and my car, had a big garage sale and gave all my money to the church, would that get me into heaven?' 'NO!' the children answered. 'If I cleaned the church every day, mowed the garden, and kept everything tidy, would that get me into heaven?' Again, the answer was 'NO!' By now I was ...
The Wisdom of a Dog
Post Date: 2009-07-18 11:34:35 by Turtle
1 Comments
I own a runt of a pug named Norman . Sometimes I call him Woola, after the gigantic, savage (but ultimately nice) Martian hound dog in Edgar Rice Burroughs' The Warlord of Mars. Mostly, though, I call him Norman. He looks like a Norman . Like pretty much all pugs, Norman isn't very bright. I reckon, intelligence-wise, he's somewhere in-between a rock and a cabbage. But like nearly all pugs, he's a good-natured clown. He has done such things as fall off of my lap into the trashcan and sleep on his back with his front paws sticking straight up in the air. He hops back and forth like a rabbit, and often spins around, as if he thinks something is sneaking up behind him. He ...
Goldman Sachs in Talks to Acquire Treasury Department
Post Date: 2009-07-16 18:41:45 by Flintlock
7 Comments
Goldman Sachs in Talks to Acquire Treasury Department Sister Entities to Share Employees, Money In what some on Wall Street are calling the biggest blockbuster deal in the history of the financial sector, Goldman Sachs confirmed today that it was in talks to acquire the U.S. Department of the Treasury. According to Goldman spokesperson Jonathan Hestron, the merger between Goldman and the Treasury Department is "a good fit" because "they're in the business of printing money and so are we." The Goldman spokesman said that the merger would create efficiencies for both entities: "We already have so many employees and so much money flowing back and forth, this ...
Girls In Bras Riding A Roller Coaster
Post Date: 2009-07-15 23:25:06 by X-15
3 Comments
www.collegehumor.com/video:1915003 You must be at least this hot to ride this ride!!
Any gay men out there?
Post Date: 2009-07-15 14:49:39 by X-15
0 Comments
Then get the hell over to libertypost, they're recruitin' ;-)
Among the Oak and Ash - Peggy-O
Post Date: 2009-07-15 00:36:09 by Critter
0 Comments
This band is going to be big. I can't wait to see them play live. A better version can be found here: www.youtube.com/watch?v=9d4E3bEuPV8 Embedding for the good version was disabled.
Post locked; no explination
Post Date: 2009-07-14 22:13:49 by rack42
10 Comments
Yup, my post was denied. I don't know why. Simply got a message that "Post Locked." How cool is that. What was my post about? www.tristateutility.com Think for yourself
Lucky Sox Fans To Get Mini-Bats, Split $800 Billion
Post Date: 2009-07-14 14:48:27 by X-15
2 Comments
CHICAGO - Chicago White Sox front office spokesman Scott Reifert announced today that fans attending a July 11 twin bill versus the Minnesota Twins at US Cellular Field will receive a free commemorative mini-bat, unlimited ten cent Budweiser, and up to $800 Billion in federal bailout money. Billed as "Recession Demolition Night," Reifert said the giveaway promises to be the "biggest fan attraction since 1979." The unique cross-promotion was the brainchild of White Sox GM Ken Williams and the Obama Administration, and Reifert said it took nearly 45 minutes of careful planning to work out the details. "The Administration had $800 billion in unspent stimulus money, ...
Pretty in Black
Post Date: 2009-07-12 13:17:48 by christine
0 Comments
Australian Heat Wave - Pics of Koalas - awwww of the day
Post Date: 2009-07-12 12:14:37 by christine
6 Comments
With temperatures above 115 ° Fahrenheit, koalas suddenly became much less fearful in Australia, even asking water from cyclists! In the following pictures, you can see a small koala that went in the back porch of a house to escape the Australian heat. The woman filled a bowl with cold water, and after drinking some of it, the koala entered the bowl to cool down. Always think of the animals when it's hot outside!
Fantasy
Post Date: 2009-07-11 20:48:29 by abraxas
10 Comments
Hey, anybody remember this ol' tune.........somehow it seems appropriate these days. What do you think the tune of the day should be?
Turtle Gives Mickey the Pug Some Likker
Post Date: 2009-07-11 12:49:25 by Turtle
5 Comments
Since Mickey the pug was beggging for some of my Mike's Hard Lemonade last night, I put a glug in his water bowl. He drank the whole thing enthusiastically, then fell asleep for nine hours. I will do this more often.
4um's server has a new motherboard
Post Date: 2009-07-10 17:45:35 by christine
35 Comments
We're all fixed up now.
Police call rifle 'suspicious'
Post Date: 2009-07-09 13:20:06 by Jethro Tull
4 Comments
Police call rifle 'suspicious' Boy found weapon in stream in Harris Twp. Sara Ganim- sganim@centredaily.com State College police are calling the rusty rifle found by an 8-year-old in Harris Township on Sunday "suspicious." An 8-year-old boy discovered this modified rifle while playing in a stream near the 800 block of Ashwood Lane in Harris Township. State College police Capt. Dana Leonard said the barrel of the .32-caliber Marlin 3365 was sawed off and shortened and the stock was altered to be more like a pistol grip. Altering a rifle like that is illegal in Pennsylvania, Leonard said. He said the serial number was also obliterated — although it’s not ...
Oh dear God.....TFLN (texts from last night)
Post Date: 2009-07-08 15:25:53 by gengis gandhi
12 Comments
(216): My Blind Date Arrived. She looks like something I'd draw with my left hand. (515): if your phone is working sorry i called you at 2am. if it is not then i never called your phone at 2am (501): He just told me he would murder a thousand dolphins to be with me. Quite the charmer. (262): Just ran to the store on my way to the office to buy Diet Coke...the guy in front of me let me cut because it was 4 more minutes until 8am, so he wouldn't be able to purchase his vodka. I love Wisconsin (506): Using pot as a way to stop crying probably isn't a good sign huh? (1-506): Meh, some people pop Prozac, you smoke weed. Po-tay-to. po-tah-to (650): dude, i just saw a bobcat while ...
How are you honoring Michael Jackson today?
Post Date: 2009-07-07 12:21:23 by Jethro Tull
29 Comments
An elderly couple walked into the lobby of the Mayo clinic
Post Date: 2009-07-05 18:13:26 by Jethro Tull
4 Comments
spotted a piano, and started playing. They've been married 62 years. He will be 90 next month.
NORTH MEXICAN NATIONAL ANTHEM
Post Date: 2009-07-05 16:44:29 by X-15
1 Comments
NORTH MEXICAN NATIONAL ANTHEM (to the tune of "God Bless The JewSA" by Lee Greenberg) Even though a wetback took the job I've worked at all my life Even though a dirty, smelly nigger Ran off with my wife Even though my daughter's got the clap Any my son says he's "gay" I'll never lift a finger 'Gainst the good old JewSA CHORUS: And I'm proud to live in North Mexico Where I'm the minority And I'll gladly suck ol' Hymie's sack And drink his kosher pee And I'll proudly cave your skull right in If you dare to disagree 'Cause I hate my race And ZOG's my god I worship my TV From the queers of Minnesota To the nigs of ...
Stuff Black People Don't Like
Post Date: 2009-07-04 18:51:16 by Turtle
14 Comments
It is a well-known fact that Black people love to dance. Go to any night club,church, high school sporting event or any place Black people congregate and you will see Black people dancing. Black people love rhythm, displaying soul and harmony, being hip and showing off their incredible dance moves. Ask anyone who has ever viewed a step-team show on a college campus and seen the incredible discipline and choreographed maneuvers that Black people, and you will get an answer in the affirmative that Black people can dance. Most people know of the famous Florida A&M marching band, which gives off Clark Kent impression of being a normal band, but is actually the Superman of college bands, ...
Turtle's Favorite Band When He Was 16
Post Date: 2009-07-04 16:20:02 by Turtle
8 Comments
Poster Comment:This song was playing at a party when I was 16, where I meet a girl who said, "So, you do want to out your car and..." This song is permanently etched on my Brain. She's probably perfectly round these days.
A Pug Tries to Pee on Turtle
Post Date: 2009-07-04 11:26:01 by Turtle
11 Comments
I was sitting under a tree in a park yesterday, with Mickey the pug sitting next to me. And who comes by? Two women walking a pug. So, of ocurse, they walked over. and Mickey and their pug started playing. Their pug was so excited he lifted his leg and peed on Turtle just a bit before I got out of the way. One of the woman said he would pee on anything that was stationary, and Turtle was certainly stationary. For all that, a good time was had by all. First time I've ever been peed on by a dog.
'tube Gulf Coast of Florida
Post Date: 2009-07-03 21:09:25 by Jethro Tull
3 Comments
Yay for Fido!
Post Date: 2009-07-02 21:44:32 by Turtle
3 Comments
The year: 2084. The place: any city in the USA. Characters: Father, Daughter, Baby, Fido and a Few Shadowy Characters. Father parks his 1986 Yugo at a curb and exits the vehicle with Daughter, Baby, and Fido the Chihuahua. Police Officer (emerging from the shadows. He is a clone, as all the police are in 2084. He has a narrow head and squinty lop-sided eyes and bears strong resemblance to George Bush): Hold it right there! Father: What? What did I do? Officer: I have to search all of you and the car for a bomb! It's a new Global UN law passed this morning. Father: I haven't heard a thing about it. Officer: That's not my problem. I have a job to do and orders to follow. ...
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