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Title: Do You Own a Demon-Possessed Ford?
Source:
Ford Public Relations
URL Source: http://www.ford.com
Published: Feb 3, 2010
Author: Rabbi Essostein
Post Date: 2010-02-03 14:19:50 by Esso
Keywords: None
Views: 573
Comments: 22
Do You Own a Demon-Possessed Ford Vehicle? At Ford Motor Company we are determined not to make the same mistakes that the PR department at Toyota made by admitting to possible defects in our products where none exist. Acting-President Rahm "Never let a crisis go to waste" Emmanuel has seized on the media-generated hysteria over "Demon-Possessed Toyotas" to put Government Motor's (GM) leading competetor, out of business. Ford is the #2 threat to a Federal Government Motor Monopoly, and we're scared. So, at Ford, we're going to make it easy on you retards who are too stupid to chew gum and walk at the same time that have gotten caught up in the demon-possessed automobile hysteria. All you have to do is take your "demon-possessed" Ford, Lincoln or Mercury car and paperwork into any Ford dealer, walk into the showroom, and yell, "I'M A MORON AND I WANT MY MONEY BACK!" We will immediately issue you a check for the full value of your vehicle, no questions asked, and sell it to someone who is not a moron that is too stupid to drive. At Ford, we pride ourselves on our quality engineering & construction, and quite frankly, we don't want 'tards in our products. At Ford, getting idiots out of our cars is now Job #1. We don't want to give the government any reason to put us out of business because you're stupid. Rememember: "I'M A MORON AND I WANT MY MONEY BACK!" Now, go wipe the drool off your chin.
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#1. To: Esso (#0)
I would LOVE to own a demon-possessed Ford: (For Lod: a Ford GT-40)
_________________________________________________________________________ Well, yeah, but you're not a tard. NO F40 FOR YOU!
The only stimulus $$ we'll ever see.
Nooooooooooooooooooooo!!! _________________________________________________________________________ I like those hunting buggies, also the 1957 Chevrolet-version is sharp.
_________________________________________________________________________ Esso will prolly call me gay, but I have a 1:25 model of a GT40, number 98. White all over with black hood. I built that sucker more than a decade ago and it's still holding together, all the other models I've built are long gone.
In 2007, the FBI reported on concern about white supremacists recruiting soldiers, saying "hundreds" of neo-Nazis were in the active military. But in April, a Department of Homeland Security report on extremism that reiterated much the same point was widely criticized by veterans groups and some conservative politicians as being unpatriotic, leading the Justice Department to retract the DHS report. Critics acknowledge that extremism in the Army is a touchy political subject. They do have a variety of rigs to choose from. The owner of the Cart Shed told us that she'd have been out of business were it not for the stimulus rebates on golf cars.
What? Are you too cheap to hire a Chink to do your manual labor? Are you gay or sumpthin'?
Chinks stole my paint job, which I gotta say looks about as butch as I can muster, eh?
In 2007, the FBI reported on concern about white supremacists recruiting soldiers, saying "hundreds" of neo-Nazis were in the active military. But in April, a Department of Homeland Security report on extremism that reiterated much the same point was widely criticized by veterans groups and some conservative politicians as being unpatriotic, leading the Justice Department to retract the DHS report. Critics acknowledge that extremism in the Army is a touchy political subject. I have a Ford Windstar a friend returning to Egypt sold to me for a dollar to avoid the gift tax. I took it as it's forth gear was not working and it is a useful vehicle when I am vending at Saturday Market. The overdrive healed itself however, and I've been using it to go to Portland, Florence, Medford, and other places I had been taking a bicycle of the train to get to. So, it is arguably a demon, or a saint. Depends on your perspective I guess.
I know whenever I see a Transit pass by... I see a lot of black smoke and an eerie rattle of chains from the bonnet... :-P
Has martial law been discreetly declared in Ireland? http://www.rte.ie/news/2010/0114/garda.html "The Emergency Response Unit have been deployed at checkpoints in Dublin over the coming weeks as part of a garda initiative against gang-related crime." You can't holler for a dollar, Mike.
OMG, that's the Ghost of Global Warming making its' presence known!! Ford Demon, get thee hence!!
_________________________________________________________________________ Wave a smoking branch of sage underneath it, pour a quart of Motorcraft tranny fluid around the van in a perfect circle, and chant a few paragraphs from Henry Fords The International Jew from the drivers' seat , that oughta fix it for good ;-)
_________________________________________________________________________ The Ghost of Balmy Christmases! lol
Has martial law been discreetly declared in Ireland? http://www.rte.ie/news/2010/0114/garda.html "The Emergency Response Unit have been deployed at checkpoints in Dublin over the coming weeks as part of a garda initiative against gang-related crime." Naw, the best way to fix it is Vietnamese style Weasel, pour 5 gallons of gas over your head, start chanting to your wicca goddess giai and light up :) It'll fix anything Show Me Obama's Birth Certificate!
Want to go after some big monsters?
In 2007, the FBI reported on concern about white supremacists recruiting soldiers, saying "hundreds" of neo-Nazis were in the active military. But in April, a Department of Homeland Security report on extremism that reiterated much the same point was widely criticized by veterans groups and some conservative politicians as being unpatriotic, leading the Justice Department to retract the DHS report. Critics acknowledge that extremism in the Army is a touchy political subject. How about a "friendly" wager first? I'll bet a bottle of Gzinkistan's finest against a bag of Hoosier ditch weed that the Whodats' whoop coach nignog and his band of merry (gay?) men.
Show Me Obama's Birth Certificate!
I'd be arrested before we got off the boat, tigers and honeypots and all that.
In 2007, the FBI reported on concern about white supremacists recruiting soldiers, saying "hundreds" of neo-Nazis were in the active military. But in April, a Department of Homeland Security report on extremism that reiterated much the same point was widely criticized by veterans groups and some conservative politicians as being unpatriotic, leading the Justice Department to retract the DHS report. Critics acknowledge that extremism in the Army is a touchy political subject. lol.....the 1993 Taurus. I'll be laughing about that one all night.
"The conscious and intelligent manipulation of the organized habits and opinions of the masses is an important element in democratic society. Those who manipulate this unseen mechanism of society constitute an invisible government which is the true ruling power of our country. ... We are governed, our minds are molded, our tastes formed, our ideas suggested, largely by men we have never heard of." Edward Bernays, Father of Public Relations
Still the best that ever were!
Show Me Obama's Birth Certificate!
Ford Unveils New Car For Cash-Strapped Buyers: The 1993 Taurus
computer counted ballots are ballots that have been counted in secret, and with all probability not the way one voted.
#2. To: Esso (#0)
"This man is Jesus,” shouted one man, spilling his Guinness as Barack Obama began his inaugural address. “When will he come to Kenya to save us?”
-Schweizerische Schuetzenzeitung (Swiss Shooting Federation) April, 1941
#3. To: X-15 (#2)
I would LOVE to own a demon-possessed Ford:
Mike Flaherty: Yeah, it's been there a long time. I wish I knew which corner.
My Man Godfrey (1936)
#4. To: Essostein, X-15, drivers (#3)
here's a link to the place my brother and I purchased our free (thanks to the kenyan's full-price rebate) Golf Cars -
#5. To: Esso (#3)
NO F40 FOR YOU!
"This man is Jesus,” shouted one man, spilling his Guinness as Barack Obama began his inaugural address. “When will he come to Kenya to save us?”
-Schweizerische Schuetzenzeitung (Swiss Shooting Federation) April, 1941
#6. To: Lod (#4)
"This man is Jesus,” shouted one man, spilling his Guinness as Barack Obama began his inaugural address. “When will he come to Kenya to save us?”
-Schweizerische Schuetzenzeitung (Swiss Shooting Federation) April, 1941
#7. To: X-15, Esso (#2)
#8. To: X-15. all (#6)
#9. To: Dakmar (#7)
I built that sucker more than a decade ago...
Mike Flaherty: Yeah, it's been there a long time. I wish I knew which corner.
My Man Godfrey (1936)
#10. To: Esso (#9)
#11. To: Esso (#0)
#12. To: Esso (#0)
Demon-Possessed Ford
#13. To: Ferret Mike (#11)
#14. To: irishthatcherite (#12)
"This man is Jesus,” shouted one man, spilling his Guinness as Barack Obama began his inaugural address. “When will he come to Kenya to save us?”
-Schweizerische Schuetzenzeitung (Swiss Shooting Federation) April, 1941
#15. To: Ferret Mike, Lod, Flintlock (#11)
The overdrive healed itself however, and I've been using it to go to Portland, Florence, Medford, and other places I had been taking a bicycle of the train to get to.
"This man is Jesus,” shouted one man, spilling his Guinness as Barack Obama began his inaugural address. “When will he come to Kenya to save us?”
-Schweizerische Schuetzenzeitung (Swiss Shooting Federation) April, 1941
#16. To: X-15 (#14)
OMG, that's the Ghost of Global Warming making its' presence known!! Ford Demon, get thee hence!!
#17. To: X-15, Mikey the Weasel (#15)
Wave a smoking branch of sage underneath it, pour a quart of Motorcraft tranny fluid around the van in a perfect circle,
#18. To: Flintlock (#17)
#19. To: Dakmar (#18)
Want to go after some big monsters?
#20. To: Flintlock (#19)
#21. To: IRTorqued (#1)
#22. To: Dakmar (#20)
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