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Title: Portugal Soccer Star Clipped on Ankle by Shopping Cart in Grocery Store, Falls to Ground Writhing and Holding Face
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URL Source: http://www.dailygoat.com/2010/06/so ... -ground-writhing-holding-face/
Published: Jun 22, 2010
Author: .
Post Date: 2010-06-27 23:37:16 by James Deffenbach
Keywords: None
Views: 145
Comments: 3
Portugal’s soccer star and notorious diver, Cristiano Ronaldo, was reaching for a Strawberry Banana Yoplait Light yogurt in the refrigerated section of a small Cape Town grocery store when his ankle was nicked by a shopping cart pushed by Shannon O’Malley, an American World Cup fan who was distracted by her fruitless attempt to find some vanilla soy milk. “I was pushing the cart down the aisle and these carts aren’t like the ones at Safeway. The wheels are really sticky, one of them just spun around in circles constantly and it really pulled right,” Shannon said. “Anyhow, as I was walking down the aisle, I guess my cart hit this guy, but honestly, I did not feel anything. “But next thing I know this dude is on the ground with his hands over his face and convulsing or something. I had no idea what the hell was going on. I thought maybe he was having an epileptic seizure, and I should call a doctor.” FIFA officials were quickly notified of the contact and appeared on site within minutes. Upon arrival, FIFA referee, Koman Coulibaly, instantly red-carded Shannon, entering her into his book. She was immediately removed from the grocery store and told not to come back tomorrow either. As Shannon walked out towards her Hertz rental car wondering where she would ever find vanilla soy milk in this freaking city, she could be heard muttering loudly to no one in particular, “What the f**k was that all about?” At the same time, Ronaldo could be seen on closed circuit TV walking normally in the snack aisle picking up some Oreos and smiling.
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#1. To: James Deffenbach, *Humor-Weird News* (#0)
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Liberty is not a means to a higher political end. It is itself the highest political end. He (Gordon Duff) also implies that forcibly removing Obama, a Constitution-hating, on-the-down-low, crackhead Communist, is an attack on America, Mom, and apple pie. I swear these military people are worse than useless. Just look around at the condition of the country and tell me if they have fulfilled their oaths to protect the nation from all enemies foreign and domestic.
#2. To: James Deffenbach (#0)
Obama is the miscegenated bastard of a white communist whore. True story.
-Schweizerische Schuetzenzeitung (Swiss Shooting Federation) April, 1941
#3. To: X-15 (#2)
Lord Acton
OsamaBinGoldstein posted on 2010-05-25 9:39:59 ET (2 images) Reply Trace
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