The CAT AND THE PORTUGUESE The Portuguese was aggravated at his wife's cat. Then one beautiful sunny day, took the cat, put it in a bag, tied the bag, put in the trunk of the car, drove 20 blocks, dropped the bag there. When he returned, the cat was on the doorstep. Irritated, the Portuguese repeated the operation, he drove 40 blocks and dropped the bag there. When he returned, the cat was back in the door. Enraged, he repeated the operation, he drove 20 blocks ahead, 30 to the left, 40 on right, 10 down, 32 up ... - Now I want to see! Said portuga. He waited about five minutes, then called home and the woman answered: - Maria, the cat's there? - He has just arrived, why? - Put the sonofabitch on the phone because I'm lost!
KISS
An Argentinean, a Brazilian, a nun and a girl were all in the same elevator.. Suddenly, the power went out in the building and the elevator stopped. In the darkness of the elevator could be heard the sound of a kiss followed by a slap. A few moments later ... again a kiss followed by a slap. Power is soon restored, the light came on and everyone in the elevator kept quiet thinking the following: The Nun: 'One of the two must have kissed the girl and she retaliated with two slaps'. THE GIRL: "One of the two might have tried to kiss me, just kissing the nun and took two slaps'. The ARGENTINO: 'That bastard BRAZILIAN! He kissed the girl twice and she slapped me thinking it was me'. The BRAZILIAN: 'Ha, ha, ha ... kissed the palm of my hand twice and got in two slaps on that Argentino mofo!