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Title: Jew jokes
Source:
the internet
URL Source: http://none
Published: Sep 7, 2010
Author: anti-semites
Post Date: 2010-09-07 16:32:32 by X-15
Keywords: None
Views: 197
Comments: 2
How do you start a Jewish marathon? Roll a penny down a hill. Why did Hitler kill himself? He couldn't pay the gas bill. How many Jews can you fit in a Volkswagen Bug? Thirty: Five on the seats and 25 in the ashtray. What's the difference between a pepperoni pizza and a Jew? Pepperoni pizza doesn't scream when you put it in the oven. How do you scare a Jew? Turn on the oven. Why aren't there any Jewish mothers on parole boards? They'd never let anyone finish a sentence! What is the difference between an Italian grandmother and a Jewish grandmother? One says, "If you don't eat, I'll kill you," and the other says, "If you don't eat, I'll kill myself." Why is money green? Jews pick it before it's ripe. How was the Grand Canyon formed? A long, long time ago, a Jew dropped a nickel down a gopher hole. How was copper wire invented? Two Jews found the same penny. What's a Jew's idea of Christmas? Parking meters on the roof. What does the Jewish Santa Claus say? "Ho! Ho! Ho! Anybody wanna buy some toys?" What is the difference between a Jew and a canoe? Canoes tip. What's the object of Jewish football? To get the quarterback. What did the little German boy get for his birthday? An Easy Bake oven and a G.I Jew. Who is the greatest Jewish cook ever? Hitler. Why does a Jew pick his nose? It's cheaper than using a tissue. What is the title of the Jew favorite how-to-book? "How to Make Money!" When a Jew throws a party, what do his guests drive? The goys crazy! Why did the Jew rush to the discount store? The ad said: "CHEAP!!!" Why is the rhinoceros jealous of Jews? Jews have bigger noses. Why do Jews have big noses? Because air is free. What time is bed time at a Jew's house? When electricity is too expensive. What do Jews and niggers both like to ride? Blondes. What is the worst stain on a Jew's underwear? Lipstick from a Jewess. Why does the Jew do after one of his friends leaves? He checks the sofa for loose change. How do you tell a Jewish mother at a wedding? She's the one down on her hands and knees, picking up the grains of rice. What did the sunbather shout at the Jew? No, I won't PAY you for sunshine! What is a Jew's ideal of a perfect 10? Any blonde he can get. Why did the Jew want his own kid? Cheap labor. What repulsive thing can be found in a Jew's clothes? The occupant. What has a big nose, stinks, and acts like a repulsive jerk? The typical Jew. Why did the gas company fire the Jew? He was allergic to gas. Why are Jews' pants so big? So they don't need to buy a wallet. Why don't Jews eat pork? They don't want to eat their relatives. What did the Jew say to the bank teller? I want MORE! Where does the Jew look for dates? Porn sites. Why does the Jew hate his own reputation? The truth hurts! What caused the Jew's biggest problem? The greatest man who ever lived, ADOLF HITLER!
Poster Comment: This is sure to start the bitching on El-Pee and Butt-Flame
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#1. To: X-15 (#0)
Ancient Writings A team of archaeologists was excavating in Israel when they came upon a cave. Written on the wall of the cave were the following symbols in order of appearance. 1. A woman 2. A donkey 3. A shovel 4. A fish 5. A Star of David They decided that this was a unique find and the writings were at least more than three thousand years old. They chopped out the piece of stone and had it brought to the museum where archaeologists from all over the world came to study the ancient symbols. They held a huge meeting after months of conferences to discuss what they could agree was the meaning of the markings. The President of their society stood up and pointed at the first drawing and said: "This looks like a woman. We can judge that this race was family oriented and held women in high esteem You can also tell they were intelligent, as the next symbol resembles a donkey, so, they were smart enough to have animals help them till the soil. The next drawing looks like a shovel of some sort, which means they even had tools to help them. Even further proof of their high intelligence is the fish, which means that if they had a famine hit the earth, whereby the food didn't grow, they would take to the sea for food. The last symbol appears to be the Star of David which means they were evidently Hebrews." The audience applauded enthusiastically and the President smiled and said, "I'm glad to see that you are all in full agreement with our interpretations." Suddenly, a little old man stood up in the back of the room and said, "I object to every word. The explanation of what the writings say is quite simple. First of all, everyone knows that Hebrews don't read from left to right, but from right to left... Now, look again... It now says: "'Holy Mackerel, Dig The Ass On That Woman!'"
Q: What did the Rabbi pedophile say to the 10-year old boy? A: "Hey! Go easy on the candy!"
#2. To: X-15 (#0)
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