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Title: Rapture Pet Insurance
Source:
Eternal Earth-Bounds Pets
URL Source: [None]
Published: Sep 14, 2010
Author: Unknown
Post Date: 2010-09-14 11:59:51 by Turtle
Keywords: None
Views: 2168
Comments: 50
Effective Sept. 2010: NOW SERVICING ALABAMA and OHIO You've committed your life to Jesus. You know you're saved. But when the Rapture comes what's to become of your loving pets who are left behind? Eternal Earth-Bound Pets takes that burden off your mind. We are a group of dedicated animal lovers, and atheists. Each Eternal Earth-Bound Pet representative is a confirmed atheist, and as such will still be here on Earth after you've received your reward. Our network of animal activists are committed to step in when you step up to Jesus. We are currently active in 24 states. Our representatives have been screened to ensure that they are atheists, animal lovers, are moral / ethical with no criminal background, have the ability and desire to rescue your pet and the means to retrieve them and ensure their care for your pet's natural life. We currently cover the following states: Maine,New Hampshire, Vermont, Massachusetts, Connecticut, Rhode Island, Wisconsin, Minnesota, Michigan, Arkansas, Mississippi, Tennessee, Kentucky, Colorado, Oklahoma, Kansas, Washington, Oregon, Idaho, Montana, North Carolina, Georgia, Alabama and Ohio. Our service is plain and simple; our fee structure is reasonable. For $110.00 we will guarantee that should the Rapture occur within ten (10) years of receipt of payment, one pet per residence will be saved. Each additional pet at your residence will be saved for an additional $15.00 fee. A small price to pay for your peace of mind and the health and safety of your four legged and feathered friends. Unfortunately at this time we are not equipped to accommodate all species and must limit our services to dogs, cats, birds, rabbits, and small caged mammals. [Please note: we can now offer rescue services for horses, camels, llamas and donkeys in NH,VT, ID and MT ] Thank you for your interest in Eternal Earth-Bound Pets. We hope we can help provide you with peace of mind. Please visit our FAQS page {Note: A portion of income generated from advertising on this site is contributed to community food shelves / food banks in Minnesota and New Hampshire}
Poster Comment: I hope none of those disgusting non-Christians, when they get raptured straight to Hell (which is where they are all going) have any pugs I have to save. Don't much care about chihuahaus and other yappy little dogs.
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Begin Trace Mode for Comment # 20.
#5. To: Turtle (#0)
I'm jealous I didn't think of this con game first.
I wouldn't call it a Con game. Rather it is W.C. Fields/Menckenesque: "Never give a sucker an even break."
I wonder if A K A Stone's pet is covered too.
I wonder if A K A Stone's pet is covered too. A Stone with a pet stone? Wouldn't a pet grub be more appropriate? Or if he is feeling especially defensive a scorpion or centipede? They all like to take residence under rocks.
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#8. To: Ferret (#5)
I'm jealous I didn't think of this con game first.
#13. To: Original_Intent (#8)
#20. To: Ferret (#13)
To: Original_Intent
Replies to Comment # 20.