All is Vanity
See other All is Vanity ArticlesTitle: A Blonde's Year in Review
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Published: Dec 15, 2010
Author: unk.
Post Date: 2010-12-15 12:02:40 by ndcorup
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Views: 291
Comments: 5
> A Blonde's Year in Review
January Took new scarf back to store because it was too tight.
February Fired from pharmacy job for failing to print labels.
Helllloooo!!!........bottles won't fit in printer!!!
MarchGot really excited.......finished jigsaw puzzle in 6 months......
Box said ' 2-4 years!'
April Trapped on escalator for hours ...
Power went out!!!
May Tried to make Kool-Aid......wrong instructions....
8 cups of water won't fit into those little packets!!!
JuneTried to go water skiing.......
Couldn't find a lake with a slope.
July Lost breast stroke swimming competition.....
Learned later, the other swimmers cheated, they used their arms!!!
August Got locked out of my car in rain storm.....
Car swamped because soft-top was open.
September The capital of California is 'C'.....isn't it???
October Hate M & M's.....
They are so hard to peel.
November Baked turkey for 4 1/2 days ...
Instructions said 1 hour per pound and I weigh 108!!
December
Couldn't call 911.
'Duh'......there's no 'eleven' button on the stupid phone!!!
AND....
A man was in his front yard mowing grass when his attractive blonde female neighbor came out of the house and went straight to the mailbox.
She opened it then slammed it shut and stormed back in the house.
A little later she came out of her house again went to the mail box and again, opened it, slammed it shut again.. Angrily, back into the house she went.
As the man was getting ready to edge the lawn, here she came out again, marched to the mail box, opened it and then slammed it closed harder than ever.
Puzzled by her actions the man asked her, 'Is something wrong?'
To which she replied, 'There certainly is!'
(Are you ready? This is a beauty...)
'My stupid computer keeps saying, 'YOU'VE GOT MAIL!'
>
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"If ever this vast country is brought under a single government, it will be one of the most extensive corruption, indifferent and incapable of a wholesome care over so wide a spread of surface. This will not be borne, and you will have to choose between reform and revolution. If I know the spirit of this country, the one or the other is inevitable." - Thomas Jefferson
"“Believe nothing merely because you have been told it. Do not believe what your teacher tells you merely out of respect for the teacher. But whatsoever, after due examination and analysis, you find to be kind, conducive to the good, the benefit, the welfare of all beings - that doctrine believe and cling to, and take it as your guide.” ~ Gautama Siddhartha — The Buddha
The relationship between morality and liberty is a directly proportional one. "Only a virtuous people are capable of freedom. As nations become corrupt and vicious, they have more need of masters." - Ben Franklin
The relationship between morality and liberty is a directly proportional one. "Only a virtuous people are capable of freedom. As nations become corrupt and vicious, they have more need of masters." - Ben Franklin
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