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Title: Armadillo touches a woman.
Source: [None]
URL Source: [None]
Published: Apr 3, 2011
Author: Me
Post Date: 2011-04-04 00:04:17 by Armadillo
Keywords: None
Views: 2902
Comments: 34

This story involves a lesbian sending mixed signals, an incomprehensible deity, Match.com, a turd in a pool, and a hot tub. It ends with a nice lady named Donna.
For some time I've had a crush on my lesbian coworker. Unable to reconcile my feelings, and her mixed signals, I turned to God. At first I thought God would help me get over her, then I thought He wanted us together, now I have no idea. I'm starting to think maybe God doesn't give a crap what I do or don't do regarding my coworker.
So I got tired of second guessing myself, second guessing God, and the lesbians mixed signals, and joined Match.com in hopes of finding a woman. I have had a few nibbles at my profile, but so far nothing promising. There is a hot Asian dentist that seems interested, but she's too good for me. If I'm the best she can do, there must be something wrong with her.

Sunday I made my usual trip to the nudist resort to relax and enjoy nature. The resort is also helping to socialize me and reduce my shyness (I hope). It was a nice day, met some nice people, and it seemed like any other day. In the late afternoon I went to the pool to unwind. I walked around in the water for a while, then stepped on something soft. I looked down to see a large turd disintegrating on the bottom under my foot. I got out of the pool rather quickly.
I showered at the pool and got a little cold, so decided to go to the hot tub. I rarely use the hot tub because it's too hot and makes my heart beat too fast, but I went anyway intending to only stay in a few minutes.
So I grabbed my stuff and walked barefoot the short distance to the hot tub. I didnt want my fecal-tainted foot in my sandals.
At the hot tub I showered my feet again. There were some guys I was familiar with at the tub. So I got in the tub and sat by the water jets, and it felt sooooo good. After a few minutes I started to feel overheated, so I got out and sat on the edge of the hot tub with my feet still in the jets.

A woman entered the tub and sat near where I was. I think she checked out my weenie when she got in.
After a minute she asked if I would mind moving so she could have the jets for her back. I said that's fine and moved over and she got into the jets.
We were quiet for a while then she spoke up and asked about if I visit often and if I was single. She made a point of telling me what time she usually gets to the resort. We talked about work, nudism, and the resort, and had a nice talk.
She's not the kind of girl I would normally be interested in. Nothing wrong with her though. But she seemed interested in me, so... why not?
The sun had set and it was dark (usually when I leave), so I told her it was time for me to go. I told her it was nice to meet her and asked her name.
Her name is Donna, she asked mine and I told her, and she presented her hand. We shook hands and I left.
Then I realized, that's the first time I've touched a woman in... way too long.
I'll be looking for Donna again.


Poster Comment:

I really need a "To much information" ping list.

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Begin Trace Mode for Comment # 21.

#13. To: Armadillo, abraxas (#0)

I really need a "To much information" ping list.

we do have a deviant sex ping list.

farmfriend  posted on  2011-04-04   0:56:49 ET  Reply   Untrace   Trace   Private Reply  


#14. To: farmfriend, abraxas (#13)

we do have a deviant sex ping list.

I'm not looking to have deviant sex... Any normal sex with a female made of flesh instead of rubber would be great.
Although I guess my epic ability to NOT get laid is somewhat deviant.
LOL.

Armadillo  posted on  2011-04-04   1:29:45 ET  Reply   Untrace   Trace   Private Reply  


#15. To: Armadillo (#14) (Edited)

BS that I didn't need to post.

NotAgainYesAgain  posted on  2011-04-04   16:55:46 ET  Reply   Untrace   Trace   Private Reply  


#18. To: NotAgainYesAgain, farmfriend, abraxas (#15)

Sex outside marriage is deviant sex.

Somewhere along your lineage a woman had sex outside of marriage. If it werent for that you would not exist today. Therefore by your own statment, your very existance is deviant. Please correct that anomaly.

Are you a loser?
Yes I am.
I was abused as a child and am very shy and social phobic as a result of the baggage I carry from that. I am making progress in dealing with those issues. The nude resort has helped a lot. Thanks for your concern.
Everyone has their cross to bear, that is mine. Who are you to question that?

Armadillo  posted on  2011-04-04   18:14:39 ET  Reply   Untrace   Trace   Private Reply  


#19. To: Armadillo (#18)

I was an asshole. Check your PMs.

NotAgainYesAgain  posted on  2011-04-04   18:32:49 ET  Reply   Untrace   Trace   Private Reply  


#20. To: NotAgainYesAgain (#19)

I was an asshole.

You search of sphincter has come to the logical conclusion. : )

abraxas  posted on  2011-04-04   18:34:26 ET  Reply   Untrace   Trace   Private Reply  


#21. To: abraxas (#20)

Jay-sus.

There sure is a lot of sphincter to go round in this neighborhood.

I particularly like these unprovoked attacks. They confirm my extremely low estimation of human nature & man's regard for his fellow man.

randge  posted on  2011-04-04   18:42:30 ET  Reply   Untrace   Trace   Private Reply  


Replies to Comment # 21.

#23. To: randge (#21)

There sure is a lot of sphincter to go round in this neighborhood.

They confirm my extremely low estimation of human nature & man's regard for his fellow man.

Yes, randge, perhaps too much. Make certain that yours is protected at all costs.

Perhaps, but then again that might be a bit extreme. After all, this poster who has recently joined to fling insults our dear members has at least admitted his true nature. Therein lies a bit of hope for our fellow man.

abraxas  posted on  2011-04-04 18:48:23 ET  Reply   Untrace   Trace   Private Reply  


End Trace Mode for Comment # 21.

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