[Home]  [Headlines]  [Latest Articles]  [Latest Comments]  [Post]  [Sign-in]  [Mail]  [Setup]  [Help] 

Status: Not Logged In; Sign In

Russian army suffers massive losses as Kremlin feigns interest in peace talks — ISW Russia’s Defense Collapse Exposed by Ukraine Strike I heard libs might block some streets. 🤣 Jimmy Dore: What’s Being Said On Israeli TV Will BLOW YOUR MIND! Tucker Carlson: Douglas Macgregor- Elites will be overthrown 🎵Breakin' rocks in the hot sun!🎵 Musk & Andreessen Predict A Robot Revolution Comedian sentenced to 8 years in prison for jokes — judge allegedly cites Wikipedia during conviction BBC report finds Gaza Humanitarian Foundation hesitant to answer questions DHS nabbed 1,500 illegal aliens in MA— The Day After: Trump 'Not Interested' In Talking As Musk Continues To Make Case Against BBB Biden Judge Issues Absurd Ruling Against Trump and Gives the Boulder Terrorist a Win Alan Dershowitz Pushing for Trump to Pardon Ghislaine Maxwell Signs Of The Tremendous Economic Suffering That Is Quickly Spreading All Around Us Joe Biden Used Autopen to Sign All Pardons During His Final Weeks In Office BREAKING NEWS: Kilmar Abrego Garcia Coming Back To U.S. For Criminal Prosecution, Report Says he BEST GEN X & Millennials Memes | Ep 79 - Nostalgia 60s 70s 80s #akornzstash Paul Joseph Watson They Did Something Horrific Romantic walk under Eiffel Tower in conquered Paris srael's Attorney General orders draft for 50,000 Haredim amid Knesset turmoil Elon Musk If America goes broke, nothing else matters US disabilities from BLS broke out to a new high in May adding 739k. "Discrimination in the name of 'diversity' is not only fundamental unjust, but it also violates federal law" Target Replaces Pride Displays With Stars and Stripes, Left Melts Down [WATCH] Look at what they are giving Covid Patients in other Countries Whole packs of holistic medicine Vitamins and Ivermectin SHOCKING Gaza Aid Thefts Involve Netanyahu Himself! Congress Is Functionally Illiterate Police Adviser Cancelled for Daring to Claim Women Commit Just as Much Domestic Violence as Men Mediaite and The Daily Beast FORCED to RETRACT False Claims Caitlin Clark Is HATED By All The BLACK (LESBIAN) WBNA Players.

All is Vanity
See other All is Vanity Articles

Title: Armadillo touches a woman.
Source: [None]
URL Source: [None]
Published: Apr 3, 2011
Author: Me
Post Date: 2011-04-04 00:04:17 by Armadillo
Keywords: None
Views: 4142
Comments: 34

This story involves a lesbian sending mixed signals, an incomprehensible deity, Match.com, a turd in a pool, and a hot tub. It ends with a nice lady named Donna.
For some time I've had a crush on my lesbian coworker. Unable to reconcile my feelings, and her mixed signals, I turned to God. At first I thought God would help me get over her, then I thought He wanted us together, now I have no idea. I'm starting to think maybe God doesn't give a crap what I do or don't do regarding my coworker.
So I got tired of second guessing myself, second guessing God, and the lesbians mixed signals, and joined Match.com in hopes of finding a woman. I have had a few nibbles at my profile, but so far nothing promising. There is a hot Asian dentist that seems interested, but she's too good for me. If I'm the best she can do, there must be something wrong with her.

Sunday I made my usual trip to the nudist resort to relax and enjoy nature. The resort is also helping to socialize me and reduce my shyness (I hope). It was a nice day, met some nice people, and it seemed like any other day. In the late afternoon I went to the pool to unwind. I walked around in the water for a while, then stepped on something soft. I looked down to see a large turd disintegrating on the bottom under my foot. I got out of the pool rather quickly.
I showered at the pool and got a little cold, so decided to go to the hot tub. I rarely use the hot tub because it's too hot and makes my heart beat too fast, but I went anyway intending to only stay in a few minutes.
So I grabbed my stuff and walked barefoot the short distance to the hot tub. I didnt want my fecal-tainted foot in my sandals.
At the hot tub I showered my feet again. There were some guys I was familiar with at the tub. So I got in the tub and sat by the water jets, and it felt sooooo good. After a few minutes I started to feel overheated, so I got out and sat on the edge of the hot tub with my feet still in the jets.

A woman entered the tub and sat near where I was. I think she checked out my weenie when she got in.
After a minute she asked if I would mind moving so she could have the jets for her back. I said that's fine and moved over and she got into the jets.
We were quiet for a while then she spoke up and asked about if I visit often and if I was single. She made a point of telling me what time she usually gets to the resort. We talked about work, nudism, and the resort, and had a nice talk.
She's not the kind of girl I would normally be interested in. Nothing wrong with her though. But she seemed interested in me, so... why not?
The sun had set and it was dark (usually when I leave), so I told her it was time for me to go. I told her it was nice to meet her and asked her name.
Her name is Donna, she asked mine and I told her, and she presented her hand. We shook hands and I left.
Then I realized, that's the first time I've touched a woman in... way too long.
I'll be looking for Donna again.

Poster Comment:

I really need a "To much information" ping list.

Post Comment   Private Reply   Ignore Thread  

Begin Trace Mode for Comment # 5.

#2. To: Armadillo (#0)

You are really, really weird. Please don't come to my site.

NotAgainYesAgain  posted on  2011-04-04   0:14:03 ET  Reply   Untrace   Trace   Private Reply  

You are really, really weird.

That's not very civil. Plus, you really aren't one to be casting stones from your glass house,

abraxas  posted on  2011-04-04   0:18:14 ET  Reply   Untrace   Trace   Private Reply  

        There are no replies to Comment # 5.

End Trace Mode for Comment # 5.

Top • Page Up • Full Thread • Page Down • Bottom/Latest

[Home]  [Headlines]  [Latest Articles]  [Latest Comments]  [Post]  [Sign-in]  [Mail]  [Setup]  [Help]