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Title: 'Pubic' Enemy Megan Barnes Caused Keys Crash by Shaving Bikini Line While Driving
Source:
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URL Source: http://blogs.miaminewtimes.com/ript ... c_enemy_megan_barns_caused.php
Published: Apr 28, 2011
Author: Miami New Times
Post Date: 2011-04-28 23:52:14 by christine
Keywords: None
Views: 259
Comments: 11
In a case custom-built for Internet pun headlines, a woman crashed her car in the Keys last week while shaving her bikini line in traffic. Megan Mariah Barnes is Florida's first bikini-shaving-related traffic offender of the year. 43;Here at Riptide, our high-paid team of tabloid-producing nickname writers spent literally minutes considering the case of Megan Mariah Barnes before deciding to endorse "Pubic Enemy Number One." The Key West Citizen, which broke the story, went with a "Razor Sharp Focus" joke. Not bad, boys; not bad at all. Anyway, back to the lovely Ms. Barnes. According to the FHP's report cited by the Citizen, Barnes was driving about 45 mph through Cudjoe Key last Tuesday when she decided to shave her bikini region while her ex-husband, Charles Judy, steered from the passenger seat. The plan went awry when an SUV slowed in front of Barnes's Thunderbird in order to make a turn. The 37-year-old Barnes, who is unemployed and lists a home address in Indiana, was allegedly too concerned with her trim-job to notice and slow down. Barnes's Thunderbird slammed into the back of the SUV near Mile Marker 21. Check out this fantastic quote in the Citizen story from one of the state troopers who responded: "She said she was meeting her boyfriend in Key West and wanted to be ready for the visit," Trooper Gary Dunick said. "If I wasn't there, I wouldn't have believed it. About 10 years ago I stopped a guy in the exact same spot... who had three or four syringes sticking out of his arm. It was just surreal and I thought, 'Nothing will ever beat this.' Well, this takes it." The pubic-maintenance crash wasn't Barnes's first brush with the law. In fact, the Citizen reports, she had been convicted the day before the crash with DUI and driving with a suspended license. She faces a new felony hit-and-run charge and two misdemeanors.
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#1. To: christine (#0)
Words fail me.
__________________________________________________________ The Keys are full of people like this...really full
"The person who agrees with you 80 percent of the time is a friend and an ally — not a 20 percent traitor" - Ronald Reagan
U.S. Constitution - Article IV, Section 4: NO BORDERS + NO LAWS = NO COUNTRY
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The relationship between morality and liberty is a directly proportional one. "Only a virtuous people are capable of freedom. As nations become corrupt and vicious, they have more need of masters." - Ben Franklin
A picture of what might be her perfect soul match.
Sure she was. Her ex was probably doing Certain Things to her, and it wasn't a "trim job". Naturally her hitting the brakes would be difficult. I've seen these things happen. Sometimes the women are alone, sometimes not. .
"This man is Jesus,” shouted one man, spilling his Guinness as Barack Obama began his inaugural address. “When will he come to Kenya to save us?"
-Schweizerische Schuetzenzeitung (Swiss Shooting Federation) April, 1941
#2. To: christine, Dakmar, Esso (#0)
The 37-year-old Barnes, who is unemployed and lists a home address in Indiana, was allegedly too concerned with her trim-job to notice and slow down.
#3. To: X-15 (#1)
(Edited)
Words fail me.
#4. To: X-15 (#1)
#5. To: Flintlock (#2)
#6. To: christine (#0)
while shaving her bikini line in traffic.
Click for Privacy and Preparedness files
The 14 Words: "We must secure the existence of our people and a future for White Children." -David Lane
“Religion is regarded by the common people as true, by the wise as false, and by the rulers as useful.” -Seneca
#7. To: Jethro Tull (#5)
ewwwwwww..that's nauseating!
#8. To: Jethro Tull (#5)
lol......Whoa, what is that large Brillo Pad doing on the couch?
" If you cannot govern yourself, you will be governed by assholes. " Randge, Poet de Forum, 1/11/11
#9. To: christine (#0)
lol.....Pubic Enemy!!
" If you cannot govern yourself, you will be governed by assholes. " Randge, Poet de Forum, 1/11/11
#10. To: Flintlock (#2)
"I am not one of those weak-spirited, sappy Americans who want to be liked by all the people around them. I don’t care if people hate my guts; I assume most of them do. The important question is whether they are in a position to do anything about it." - William S Burroughs
#11. To: Dakmar (#10)
"The person who agrees with you 80 percent of the time is a friend and an ally — not a 20 percent traitor" - Ronald Reagan
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