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Title: Man admits having sex with 1,000 cars
Source:
Telegraph UK
URL Source: http://www.telegraph.co.uk/news/new ... having-sex-with-1000-cars.html
Published: May 19, 2011
Author: staff
Post Date: 2011-05-19 21:32:43 by abraxas
Keywords: None
Views: 377
Comments: 41
Man admits having sex with 1,000 cars A man who claims to have had sex with 1,000 cars has defended his "romantic" feelings towards vehicles. 12:20PM BST 21 May 2008 Edward Smith, who lives with his current "girlfriend" – a white Volkswagen Beetle named Vanilla, insisted that he was not "sick" and had no desire to change his ways. "I appreciate beauty and I go a little bit beyond appreciating the beauty of a car only to the point of what I feel is an expression of love," he said. "Maybe I'm a little bit off the wall but when I see movies like Herbie and Knight Rider, where cars become loveable, huggable characters it's just wonderful. "I'm a romantic. I write poetry about cars, I sing to them and talk to them just like a girlfriend. I know what's in my heart and I have no desire to change." He added: "I'm not sick and I don't want to hurt anyone, cars are just my preference." Mr Smith, 57, first had sex with a car at the age of 15, and claims he has never been attracted to women or men. But his wandering eye has spread beyond cars to other vehicles. He says that his most intense sexual experience was "making love" to the helicopter from 1980s TV hit Airwolf. As well as Vanilla, he regularly spends time with his other vehicles – a 1973 Opal GT, named Cinnamon, and 1993 Ford Ranger Splash, named Ginger. Before Vanilla, he had a five-year relationship with Victoria, a 1969 VW Beetle he bought from a family of Jehovah's Witnesses. But he confesses that many of the cars he has had sex with have belonged to strangers or car showrooms. His last relationship with a woman was 12 years ago - and he could not bring himself to consummate it, although he did have sex with girls in his younger days. Mr Smith, from Washington state in the US, kept quiet about his secret fetish for years, but agreed to be interviewed as part of a channel Five documentary into “mechaphilia”. He is shown meeting other enthusiasts at a rally in California Talking about how his unusual passion developed, Mr Smith said: "It's something that grew as a part of me when I was a kid and I could not shake it. "I just loved cute cars right from the beginning, but over the years it got stronger once I got into my teenage years and was my first having sexual urges. "When I turned 13 and the famous Corvette Stingray came about, that car was pure sex and just an incredible machine. I wanted it. "I didn't fully understand it myself except that I know I'm not hurting anyone and I do not intend to." He added: "There are moments way out in the middle of nowhere when I see a little car parked and I swear it needs loving. "There have been certain cars that attracted me and I would wait until night time, creep up to them and just hug and kiss them. "As far as women go, they never really interested me much. And I'm not gay.” Mr Smith is now part of a global community of more than 500 “car lovers” brought together by internet forums.
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#1. To: abraxas (#0)
(Edited)
Why isn't this filed under Ya Gotta Be Shitting Me?
Somewhere in Kenya, a village is still missing its idiot.
don't we have a ping list for this?
Do not argue with an idiot. He will drag you down to his level and beat you with experience.
What is it about perverts that make them believe they have to share their perversions with others?
I think the best way of doing good to the poor, is not making them easy in poverty, but leading or driving them out of it. - Benjamin Franklin
It's even more disturbing that there's a whole group of them out there...how can I protect the Subaru? Or the Thing? That little Thing is so cute, I now have safety concerns for her....and wait until the pink camo paint job is done, she'll be irresistible. : )
" If you cannot govern yourself, you will be governed by assholes. " Randge, Poet de Forum, 1/11/11
LOL
Do not argue with an idiot. He will drag you down to his level and beat you with experience.
That's the exhibitionist dimension of their nuttiness, they've got to let their freak-flag fly.
__________________________________________________________ There is nothing wrong with a little exhibitionism.
Do not argue with an idiot. He will drag you down to his level and beat you with experience.
The dude is carrying some set of lug nuts.
Not to pry but have either of you women ever met a man as weird as this one when you were single?
The Truth of 911 Shall Set You Free From The Lie
It's sort of creepy......
" If you cannot govern yourself, you will be governed by assholes. " Randge, Poet de Forum, 1/11/11
Not when I was single.
Do not argue with an idiot. He will drag you down to his level and beat you with experience.
ah come on, share!
Do not argue with an idiot. He will drag you down to his level and beat you with experience.
This is one for deviant sex ping list, no?
#2. To: Lod, abraxas, *Deviant Sex* (#1)
Why isn't this filed under Ya Gotta Be Shitting Me?
#3. To: abraxas (#0)
#4. To: Lod (#1)
Why isn't this filed under Ya Gotta Be Shitting Me?
#5. To: abraxas (#4)
#6. To: F.A. Hayek Fan (#3)
What is it about perverts that make them believe they have to share their perversions with others?
"This man is Jesus,” shouted one man, spilling his Guinness as Barack Obama began his inaugural address. “When will he come to Kenya to save us?"
-Schweizerische Schuetzenzeitung (Swiss Shooting Federation) April, 1941
#7. To: X-15, F.A. Hayek Fan (#6)
That's the exhibitionist dimension of their nuttiness,
#8. To: X-15 (#6)
#9. To: farmfriend, abraxas (#2)
#10. To: F.A. Hayek Fan (#3)
What is it about perverts that make them believe they have to share their perversions with others?
#11. To: Horse, abraxas (#9)
Not to pry but have either of you women ever met a man as weird as this one when you were single?
#12. To: abraxas, F.A. Hayek Fan (#10)
It's sort of creepy......
#13. To: abraxas, *Deviant Sex* (#0)
SolvoSermo.Com Free speech Video Hosting
Sewer Service Schenectady, NY Welding and fabrication Amsterdam, NY
#14. To: Critter, abraxas (#13)
I beat ya to it!
This is one for deviant sex ping list, no?
Do not argue with an idiot. He will drag you down to his level and beat you with experience.
#15. To: Horse (#9)
None so weird as this guy, but it doesn't sound like he did much socializing beyond the parking lot. : )
Not to pry but have either of you women ever met a man as weird as this one when you were single?
" If you cannot govern yourself, you will be governed by assholes. " Randge, Poet de Forum, 1/11/11
#16. To: Critter (#13)
The auto-erotica ping list?
This is one for deviant sex ping list, no?
Mike Flaherty: Yeah, it's been there a long time. I wish I knew which corner.
My Man Godfrey (
#17. To: Esso (#16)
LOL
The auto-erotica ping list
Do not argue with an idiot. He will drag you down to his level and beat you with experience.
#18. To: abraxas, farmfriend (#10)
OMG, you left the door open just a bit there.... ;-)
It's sort of creepy......
__________________________________________________________
"This man is Jesus,” shouted one man, spilling his Guinness as Barack Obama began his inaugural address. “When will he come to Kenya to save us?"
-Schweizerische Schuetzenzeitung (Swiss Shooting Federation) April, 1941
#19. To: Esso, Critter, farmfriend, abraxas, christine, octavia, Phant2000, angK (#16)
for the ladies
__________________________________________________________
"This man is Jesus,” shouted one man, spilling his Guinness as Barack Obama began his inaugural address. “When will he come to Kenya to save us?"
-Schweizerische Schuetzenzeitung (Swiss Shooting Federation) April, 1941
#20. To: abraxas (#4)
Any car that paints herself up like that is just asking for it. Isn't the internet wonderful when all sorts of interesting people can meet up? People who have sex with cars now have their own support groups. Maybe they could get some nice federal funding to promote awareness of their automotive lifestyle.
......and wait until the pink camo paint job is done, she'll be irresistible. : )
#21. To: abraxas (#0)
So he was "married" for five years with Jehovah's Witness in-laws. Now a "divorced" guy, he just goes in for hookups, like an automotive Cassanova.
Before Vanilla, he had a five-year relationship with Victoria, a 1969 VW Beetle he bought from a family of Jehovah's Witnesses.
But he confesses that many of the cars he has had sex with have belonged to strangers or car showrooms.
#22. To: TooConservative (#21)
Now a "divorced" guy, he just goes in for hookups, like an automotive Cassanova. He claims 1000 cars, he's a fucking serial-rapist, somebody get him off the streets/car-lots/leather interiors.....
But he confesses that many of the cars he has had sex with have belonged to strangers or car showrooms.
__________________________________________________________
"This man is Jesus,” shouted one man, spilling his Guinness as Barack Obama began his inaugural address. “When will he come to Kenya to save us?"
-Schweizerische Schuetzenzeitung (Swiss Shooting Federation) April, 1941
#23. To: X-15 (#19)
Stop it!! My auto erotica zone is aroused. : )
" If you cannot govern yourself, you will be governed by assholes. " Randge, Poet de Forum, 1/11/11
#24. To: abraxas, farmfriend (#0)
Wow. And people think I'm weird. Wow. I've had sex with plenty of inanimate objects, but never a car. I dont think I want to either... sharp edges. Word of the day- Yonic. The opposite of phalic.
Where does he stick his wang anyway? My car doesnt seem to have any yonic orifices.
Once you go armadillo, you never go back.
#25. To: TooConservative (#20)
Maybe they could get some nice federal funding to promote awareness of their automotive lifestyle. lol.....it's a she Thing. You can't blame her for being beautiful. Yes, and get some speech protection from the ADL too. : )
Any car that paints herself up like that is just asking for it.
" If you cannot govern yourself, you will be governed by assholes. " Randge, Poet de Forum, 1/11/11
#26. To: X-15 (#19)
LOL
Do not argue with an idiot. He will drag you down to his level and beat you with experience.
#27. To: abraxas (#0)
Well..... as long as both parties consent....
#28. To: Pinguinite, All (#27)
deleted
The relationship between morality and liberty is a directly proportional one.
"Only a virtuous people are capable of freedom. As nations become corrupt and vicious, they have more need of masters." - Ben Franklin
#29. To: Eric Stratton, Pinguinite, (#28)
He'll just get a little tail...pipe.
Just keep the gas tank doors shut!
Do not argue with an idiot. He will drag you down to his level and beat you with experience.
#30. To: farmfriend (#29)
deleted
The relationship between morality and liberty is a directly proportional one.
"Only a virtuous people are capable of freedom. As nations become corrupt and vicious, they have more need of masters." - Ben Franklin
#31. To: Eric Stratton, farmfriend (#30)
What if he's riding the console gearshift knob?? 
__________________________________________________________
"This man is Jesus,” shouted one man, spilling his Guinness as Barack Obama began his inaugural address. “When will he come to Kenya to save us?"
-Schweizerische Schuetzenzeitung (Swiss Shooting Federation) April, 1941
#32. To: X-15 (#31)
deleted
The relationship between morality and liberty is a directly proportional one.
"Only a virtuous people are capable of freedom. As nations become corrupt and vicious, they have more need of masters." - Ben Franklin
#33. To: X-15 (#31)
spinner
Do not argue with an idiot. He will drag you down to his level and beat you with experience.
#34. To: abraxas, farmfriend, all (#0)
There is another news story about a guy with the same car love. CLICK HERE.
It has a photo of him screwing a Range Rover.
Warning- Viewing the photo may cause your retina to detach from the horror.
Once you go armadillo, you never go back.
#35. To: Armadillo (#34)
Oh, my eyes!! I can see why the guy might have a hard time connecting with women. : )
" If you cannot govern yourself, you will be governed by assholes. " Randge, Poet de Forum, 1/11/11
#36. To: Armadillo, abraxas (#34)
Do not argue with an idiot. He will drag you down to his level and beat you with experience.
#37. To: farmfriend, abraxas (#36)
It's not just men who get naughty with cars...Look what you started!
Once you go armadillo, you never go back.
#38. To: farmfriend, Armadillo (#36) (Edited)
Bill and Monica approve of where this thread is going!! 
__________________________________________________________
"This man is Jesus,” shouted one man, spilling his Guinness as Barack Obama began his inaugural address. “When will he come to Kenya to save us?"
-Schweizerische Schuetzenzeitung (Swiss Shooting Federation) April, 1941
#39. To: Armadillo, abraxas, X-15 (#37)
I think I'll stick to Armadillos.
It's not just men who get naughty with cars...
Do not argue with an idiot. He will drag you down to his level and beat you with experience.
#40. To: farmfriend (#39)
I think I'll stick to Armadillos.
Once you go armadillo, you never go back.
.
.
.
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