Surprisingly few men know how to flirt. (It’s surprising because, given the importance of flirting to evoking a feeling of incipient sexual release in a girl’s mind, you’d think evolution would have ensured a lot more men are skilled at the craft. I consider the absence of widely distributed flirting skills, particularly among northern europeans and asians, to be evidence that for much of mankind’s ancestral past the sex ratio was skewed enough in the typical man’s favor that he didn’t need to learn how to appeal to women’s romantic needs.) But I digress. When girls ask simple questions, or when they engage in innocuous chit chat, it’s in your interest as a lover of positive, sexualized female attention to answer them in a flirty way. Training yourself to parry female small talk with unexpected flirtatious jousts is, at the least, great for honing your game, even when it doesn’t lead to a bang.
Here are some examples of what I’m talking about. I routinely employ these quips in my daily life anytime I hear an opening in some banal conversation that I happen to be having with a girl. These examples aren’t meant to be lifted verbatim, (although you may do that), but rather to serve as illustration of the type of mindset you should have whenever you interact with women. (Warning: do not use on fat chicks. They may get the wrong idea.)
GIRL: “What time is it?”
A good time.
GIRL: “You came in late today.”
Hard drug use.
GIRL: “Which way is it to [X]?”
You don’t seem like the kind of girl who’d go there.
GIRL: “How are you?”
Irresistible.
GIRL: “Could you watch my laptop for me for a minute?”
Ok, but close your porn windows first. I have a reputation.
GIRL: “What’d you think of [movie X]?”
All right… ready to hang on my every word?
GIRL: “Are you going to [X's] party this Friday?”
Yes. You can be happy now.
GIRL: “What do you do?”
You didn’t just ask that.
GIRL: [in an elevator] “Could you press 4?”
This is just like in the movies!
GIRL: “My shift is ending soon. Can I close you out?”
Your flirting skills need work.
GIRL: “I think the coffee machine’s broken.”
Tried to put vodka in it again, didn’t ya?
GIRL: “Where’s your car?”
Tijuana.
GIRL: “That sounds like a good idea.”
Hey, it’s me!
GIRL: “It’s a really nice day today.”
Thanks!
GIRL: “That’s a cool hat.”
Flattery will get you everywhere.
GIRL: “Are you waiting in line?”
I’d better be. Otherwise I’m standing around looking good for nothing.
GIRL: “That’ll be $69.75.”
I bet you say that to all the guys.
Just kidding about that last one. Sort of.
Flirting with women ties into the whole alpha male philosophy of not taking girls seriously. Treating women’s idle politeness like a sounding board for you to amp up the sexual tension and remind your quarry that you are a highly libidinous, fleshy extension of your turgid cock is good for establishing proper and healthy male-female relations.
When you are flippant with women, they sense that you think you are better than them, and that turns them on. Women love a man who is better than them, but they will accept as a substitute a man who simply thinks he is better than them.
Poster Comment:
This was so funny I had to post it.