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All is Vanity
See other All is Vanity Articles

Title: Is that a Turtle in your pants?
Source: The Star
URL Source: http://www.thestar.com/news/gta/201 ... _51_turtles_in_sweatpants.html
Published: Sep 26, 2014
Author: Some dude
Post Date: 2014-09-26 10:41:41 by Armadillo
Keywords: None
Views: 432
Comments: 7

Kai Xu was not happy to see the border guard. Those were turtles in his pants.
Fifty-one of them. Mostly taped to his legs. Others hidden in his crotch.
The scene is described in a criminal complaint that was filed in U.S. federal court on Tuesday, alleging that Xu, a Windsor resident, tried to sneak the amphibious reptiles across the Detroit- Windsor border in August.
His bulging sweatpants gave him away and he is charged with smuggling, trading in protected species, and illegally exporting fish or wildlife. His bond hearing in a Detroit court is scheduled for Friday.
He faces up to 10 years in a federal prison if convicted.

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#1. To: Armadillo (#0)

Xu moron.

“The most dangerous man to any government is the man who is able to think things out... without regard to the prevailing superstitions and taboos. Almost inevitably he comes to the conclusion that the government he lives under is dishonest, insane, intolerable.” ~ H. L. Mencken

Lod  posted on  2014-09-26   11:02:21 ET  Reply   Trace   Private Reply  


#2. To: Turtle, abraxas, farmfriend, Armadillo (#0)

Those were turtles in his pants. Fifty-one of them. Mostly taped to his legs. Others hidden in his crotch....His bulging sweatpants gave him away...

Took 51 of those suckers to make a decent bulge, eh??

:)

 photo 001g.gif
“With the exception of Whites, the rule among the peoples of the world, whether residing in their homelands or settled in Western democracies, is ethnocentrism and moral particularism: they stick together and good means what is good for their ethnic group."
-Alex Kurtagic

X-15  posted on  2014-09-26   12:06:49 ET  Reply   Trace   Private Reply  


#3. To: X-15 (#2)

Took 51 of those suckers to make a decent bulge, eh??

You're starting to annoy the Death Pug.

"Have Brain, Will Travel

Turtle  posted on  2014-09-26   12:14:40 ET  Reply   Trace   Private Reply  


#4. To: Turtle, abraxas, farmfriend, Armadillo (#3)

51 turtles composes a bulge in sweatpants. Hmmmm....I think Sigmund Freud could write a lengthy dissertation, indeed a small treatise, on all of the pschosexual dynamics in that sordid little episode.

:)

 photo 001g.gif
“With the exception of Whites, the rule among the peoples of the world, whether residing in their homelands or settled in Western democracies, is ethnocentrism and moral particularism: they stick together and good means what is good for their ethnic group."
-Alex Kurtagic

X-15  posted on  2014-09-26   12:27:13 ET  Reply   Trace   Private Reply  


#5. To: X-15, Turtle (#2)

Took 51 of those suckers to make a decent bulge, eh?

LOL the size of the turtle matters.


When government gains the power to control the use of private property, it becomes possible for the politically dominant to profit by high commodity prices using government regulation to constrain supply. One merely drives competitors out of business by manipulating the perception of risk to a land use preferred by a democratic majority. - Mark Edward Vande Pol

farmfriend  posted on  2014-09-26   15:53:41 ET  Reply   Trace   Private Reply  


#6. To: X-15 (#2)

I hope they aren't snapping turtles or they'll snap something off that bulge.

purplerose  posted on  2014-09-26   17:34:15 ET  Reply   Trace   Private Reply  


#7. To: purplerose (#6)

LOL


When government gains the power to control the use of private property, it becomes possible for the politically dominant to profit by high commodity prices using government regulation to constrain supply. One merely drives competitors out of business by manipulating the perception of risk to a land use preferred by a democratic majority. - Mark Edward Vande Pol

farmfriend  posted on  2014-09-26   18:01:44 ET  Reply   Trace   Private Reply  


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