See other All is Vanity Articles
Title: Is that a Turtle in your pants?
Source:
The Star
URL Source: http://www.thestar.com/news/gta/201 ... _51_turtles_in_sweatpants.html
Published: Sep 26, 2014
Author: Some dude
Post Date: 2014-09-26 10:41:41 by Armadillo
Keywords: None
Views: 629
Comments: 7
Kai Xu was not happy to see the border guard. Those were turtles in his pants.
Fifty-one of them. Mostly taped to his legs. Others hidden in his crotch.
The scene is described in a criminal complaint that was filed in U.S. federal court on Tuesday, alleging that Xu, a Windsor resident, tried to sneak the amphibious reptiles across the Detroit- Windsor border in August.
His bulging sweatpants gave him away and he is charged with smuggling, trading in protected species, and illegally exporting fish or wildlife. His bond hearing in a Detroit court is scheduled for Friday.
He faces up to 10 years in a federal prison if convicted.
Post Comment Private Reply Ignore Thread
Top • Page Up • Full Thread • Page Down • Bottom/Latest
#1. To: Armadillo (#0)
Xu moron.
“The most dangerous man to any government is the man who is able to think things out... without regard to the prevailing superstitions and taboos. Almost inevitably he comes to the conclusion that the government he lives under is dishonest, insane, intolerable.” ~ H. L. Mencken
Took 51 of those suckers to make a decent bulge, eh?? :)
#2. To: Turtle, abraxas, farmfriend, Armadillo (#0)
Those were turtles in his pants. Fifty-one of them. Mostly taped to his legs. Others hidden in his crotch....His bulging sweatpants gave him away...
-Alex Kurtagic
#3. To: X-15 (#2)
You're starting to annoy the Death Pug. Took 51 of those suckers to make a decent bulge, eh??
"Have Brain, Will Travel
#4. To: Turtle, abraxas, farmfriend, Armadillo (#3)
51 turtles composes a bulge in sweatpants. Hmmmm....I think Sigmund Freud could write a lengthy dissertation, indeed a small treatise, on all of the pschosexual dynamics in that sordid little episode. :)
-Alex Kurtagic
#5. To: X-15, Turtle (#2)
LOL the size of the turtle matters. Took 51 of those suckers to make a decent bulge, eh?
When government gains the power to control the use of private property, it becomes possible for the politically dominant to profit by high commodity prices using government regulation to constrain supply. One merely drives competitors out of business by manipulating the perception of risk to a land use preferred by a democratic majority. - Mark Edward Vande Pol
#6. To: X-15 (#2)
I hope they aren't snapping turtles or they'll snap something off that bulge.
#7. To: purplerose (#6)
LOL
When government gains the power to control the use of private property, it becomes possible for the politically dominant to profit by high commodity prices using government regulation to constrain supply. One merely drives competitors out of business by manipulating the perception of risk to a land use preferred by a democratic majority. - Mark Edward Vande Pol
Top • Page Up • Full Thread • Page Down • Bottom/Latest