See other 4play Articles
Title: Omagh’s ‘Shawshank Husband’ Dug Tunnel From Bedroom To Pub Over 15 Years (Ireland!!)
Source:
Tyrone Tribulations
URL Source: http://tyronetribulations.com/2014/ ... -bedroom-to-pub-over-15-years/
Published: Sep 25, 2014
Author: Gombeen
Post Date: 2014-10-16 13:34:07 by X-15
Keywords: Irish, pub, wife
Views: 541
Comments: 7
An Omagh plumber tunnelled a hole from under his bed to the local pub 800 feet from his house over the course of 15 years, a court heard today. Patsy Kerr had been summonsed to Omagh County Court after it emerged he had been the cause of a collapsed sewage pipe from a neighbouring house. Kerr told the court about his secret tunnel and the reasons behind it: “The wife has a bad snore on her and after watching the Shawshank Redemption on RTE one night in 1994, I decided to do something about it so I waited til she was in a deep sleep and then set about digging a hole under the bed in the direction of the pub. I used all manner of tools from spoons to a heavy duty tunnel boring machine I managed to sneak down there when she was at the shops. It wasn’t until 2009 that I hit the jackpot and came up through the women’s toilet mop and bucket room.” Kerr explained how he spent the last five years heading to the pub via his tunnel at 11pm before returning at 1am, undetected by his deep sleeping wife: “To be honest I was sort of glad I was caught. She was always smelling drink off me in the morning and I was explaining it away as a natural odour. But recently I was finding myself singing rebel songs and stuff coming back up the tunnel and it was only a matter of time before I was caught anyhow. The landlord was also wondering how I was just appearing out of nowhere at the same time every night and disappearing from the women’s toilets.” The tunnel was finally discovered after the DOE performed a survey on a sewage problem which turned out to be caused by a pipe Kerr had hit accidentally, causing sewage to leak into his tunnel over five years. The judge questioned Kerr’s wife as to why she never smelt the sewage odours from her husband. Mrs Kerr simply shrugged.
Post Comment Private Reply Ignore Thread
Top • Page Up • Full Thread • Page Down • Bottom/Latest
#1. To: X-15 (#0)
How great is that? (Some things cannot be made up) “The most dangerous man to any government is the man who is able to think things out... without regard to the prevailing superstitions and taboos. Almost inevitably he comes to the conclusion that the government he lives under is dishonest, insane, intolerable.” ~ H. L. Mencken
Thats a dedicated drunk right there, God bless the Irish.
______________________________________ Suspect all media / resist bad propaganda/Learn NLP everyday everyway ;) If you don't control your mind someone else will.
This Man provides a humbling example of dedication and fortitude in his pursuit of the craft of Drinking and Fellowship. I believe he should possibly be elevated to the status of demi-god for his Herculean perseverance. P.S. I wonder is he's a Mason, what with all that excavation?? :)
#2. To: X-15 (#0)
#3. To: Lod (#1)
-Alex Kurtagic
#4. To: X-15 (#3)
True story, or not, he must have had some craftsmanship to dead reckon in the dark to find the pub.
“The most dangerous man to any government is the man who is able to think things out... without regard to the prevailing superstitions and taboos. Almost inevitably he comes to the conclusion that the government he lives under is dishonest, insane, intolerable.” ~ H. L. Mencken
#5. To: X-15 (#0)
LOL... and after watching the Shawshank Redemption on RTE one night in 1994,
#6. To: Pinguinite (#5)
Morgan Freeman should be narrating this story. "The man crawled through 500 yds of foul smelling shit for his Guiness. Why he chose enchillada night to do it, I'll never know."
#7. To: X-15 (#0)
If this isn't proof of the absolute undeniable proof of the existence of the IRISH MAFIA I don't know what proof it would take.....hiccup ;)
Top • Page Up • Full Thread • Page Down • Bottom/Latest