When they said, “Never forget,” they weren’t kidding! Seventy years after World War II ended, the world is facing a dearth of Holocaust survivors. This, naturally, threatens the existence of a highly profitable industry that is cynically referred to as “Shoah business.”
A group of crafty survivors/entrepreneurs has hatched an ingenious idea to ensure that Holocaust survivors never die: It plans to create a series of Holocaust holograms whereby self-proclaimed camp survivors live forever through recorded interviews designed to answer every possible question tossed at them in perpetuity by eager young supplicants who’ve been beaten over the skull since infancy with the idea that only six million people died in World War II.
Based on the assumption that non-Jewish human beings will never tire of hearing about the Holocaust, investors recently spent $1 million filming octogenarian Pinchas Gutter “answering 1,800 questions about his Holocaust experience, surrounded by thousands of lights and cameras.” The assumption is that although Gutter survived the Holocaust, he ultimately won’t survive life, but his three-dimensional likeness will continue talking about the Holocaust long after he draws his last breath.
“This is mind-blowing,” gushed Holocaust survivor Aaron Elster about the new technology that enables digital guilt-mongering from here to eternity. Elster’s associates plan to film ten more survivors at a presumed cost of $500,000 per interview, which would, as luck would have it, bring the project’s total production costs to a clean and unassailable $6 million.