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Title: Why Did the Chicken Cross the Road?
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Published: Aug 22, 2015
Author: ,
Post Date: 2015-08-22 15:22:17 by christine
Keywords: None
Views: 685
Comments: 26
DONALD TRUMP: All Mexican chickens who wish to cross this road must submit to a complete background check, and full body search. BARACK OBAMA: Let me be perfectly clear, if the chickens like their eggs they can keep their eggs. No chicken will be required to cross the road to surrender her eggs. Period. JOHN McCain: My friends, the chicken crossed the road because he recognized the need to engage in cooperation and dialogue with all the chickens on the other side of the road. HILLARY CLINTON: What difference at this point does it make why the chicken crossed the road. DICK CHENEY: Where's my gun? COLIN POWELL: Now to the left of the screen, you can clearly see the satellite image of the chicken crossing the road. BILL CLINTON: I did not cross the road with that chicken. AL GORE: I invented the chicken. JOHN KERRY: Although I voted to let the chicken cross the road, I am now against it! It was the wrong road to cross, and I was misled about the chicken's intentions. I am not for it now, and will remain against it. AL SHARPTON: Why are all the chickens white? DR. PHIL: The problem we have here is that this chicken won't realize that he must first deal with the problem on this side of the road before it goes after the problem on the other side of the road. What we need to do is help him realize how stupid he is acting by not taking on his current problems before adding any new problems. OPRAH: Well, I understand that the chicken is having problems, which is why he wants to cross the road so badly. So instead of having the chicken learn from his mistakes and take falls, which is a part of life, I'm going to give this chicken a NEW CAR so that he can just drive across the road and not live his life like the rest of the chickens. ANDERSON COOPER: We have reason to believe there is a chicken, but we have not yet been allowed to have access to the other side of the road. NANCY GRACE: That chicken crossed the road because he's guilty! You can see it in his eyes and the way he walks. MARTHA STEWART: No one called me to warn me which way the chicken was going. I had a standing order at the Farmer's Market to sell my eggs when the price dropped to a certain level. No little bird gave me any insider information. DR SEUSS: Did the chicken cross the road? Did he cross it with a toad? Yes, the chicken crossed the road, but why it crossed I've not been told. ERNEST HEMINGWAY: To die in the rain, alone. JERRY FALWELL: Because the chicken was gay! Can't you people see the plain truth? That's why they call it the 'other side.' Yes, my friends, that chicken was gay. If you eat that chicken, you will become gay too. I say we boycott all chickens until we sort out this abomination that the Liberal media whitewashes with seemingly harmless phrases like 'the other side.' That chicken should not be crossing the road. It's as plain and as simple as that. GRANDPA: In my day we didn't ask why the chicken crossed the road. Somebody told us the chicken crossed the road, and that was good enough for us . BARBARA WALTERS: Isn't that interesting? In a few moments, we will be listening to the chicken tell, for the first time, the heartwarming story of how it experienced a serious case of molting, and went on to accomplish its lifelong dream of crossing the road. ARISTOTLE: It is the nature of chickens to cross the road. JOHN LENNON: Imagine all the chickens in the world crossing roads together, in peace. BILL GATES: I have just released e-Chicken 2015, which will not only cross roads, but will lay eggs, file your important documents and balance your checkbook. Internet Explorer is an integral part of e-Chicken 2015. This new platform is much more stable and will never reboot. ALBERT EINSTEIN: Did the chicken really cross the road, or did the road move beneath the chicken? COLONEL SANDERS: Did I miss one??????
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#1. To: christine (#0)
lol - good grins there, and truth.
“The most dangerous man to any government is the man who is able to think things out... without regard to the prevailing superstitions and taboos. Almost inevitably he comes to the conclusion that the government he lives under is dishonest, insane, intolerable.” ~ H. L. Mencken
Why did the little boy swim across the river on his back?
U.S. Constitution - Article IV, Section 4: NO BORDERS + NO LAWS = NO COUNTRY
So the alligator gar didn't eat his junk? So that he could be a true wet-back? Hell, I don't know; why did he? “The most dangerous man to any government is the man who is able to think things out... without regard to the prevailing superstitions and taboos. Almost inevitably he comes to the conclusion that the government he lives under is dishonest, insane, intolerable.” ~ H. L. Mencken
He didn't want the fish to get his worm.
U.S. Constitution - Article IV, Section 4: NO BORDERS + NO LAWS = NO COUNTRY
Dang! do I win a pony?
“The most dangerous man to any government is the man who is able to think things out... without regard to the prevailing superstitions and taboos. Almost inevitably he comes to the conclusion that the government he lives under is dishonest, insane, intolerable.” ~ H. L. Mencken
Check if they have any alligators left on Amazon (before it goes down).
U.S. Constitution - Article IV, Section 4: NO BORDERS + NO LAWS = NO COUNTRY
“The most dangerous man to any government is the man who is able to think things out... without regard to the prevailing superstitions and taboos. Almost inevitably he comes to the conclusion that the government he lives under is dishonest, insane, intolerable.” ~ H. L. Mencken
That thar is a big gar ..
U.S. Constitution - Article IV, Section 4: NO BORDERS + NO LAWS = NO COUNTRY
I went to a classic Mustang/Ford show earlier today, the old guy with the 65 GT-350 wasn't willing to trade straight up for my 2001 V6 coupe. He said he's think about trading just the wheels and tires for my whole car. I let him know I would still be getting the better deal in that exchange. It's fun hanging out with all those old guys once in a while. corruptissima re publica plurimae leges - Tacitus
Great, yes, we've been there, done that, even though we forgot our tee-shirts. Iaccoca knocked it outta the park with the 'stang. “The most dangerous man to any government is the man who is able to think things out... without regard to the prevailing superstitions and taboos. Almost inevitably he comes to the conclusion that the government he lives under is dishonest, insane, intolerable.” ~ H. L. Mencken
If I was Donald Trump I'd be calling Richard Branson to see if any flights to Jupiter are available for Cher. If not, why not? Oh, and make everyone equal while you're at it. :)
corruptissima re publica plurimae leges - Tacitus
Actually, Cher's been on Venus for decades now, imo.
“The most dangerous man to any government is the man who is able to think things out... without regard to the prevailing superstitions and taboos. Almost inevitably he comes to the conclusion that the government he lives under is dishonest, insane, intolerable.” ~ H. L. Mencken
The Shelby Hertz GT-350 is worth $$$$: The Shelby GT-350R is worth $$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$:
#2. To: Lod, christine (#1)
#3. To: HAPPY2BME-4UM (#2)
#4. To: Lod (#3)
#5. To: HAPPY2BME-4UM (#4)
#6. To: Lod (#5)
#7. To: HAPPY2BME-4UM (#6)
check out this alligator gar guide here in tx - amazing!
#8. To: Lod (#7)
#9. To: Lod, X-15, abraxas (#5)
Dang! do I win a pony?
#10. To: Dakmar (#9)
It's fun hanging out with all those old guys once in a while.
#11. To: Lod, christine (#10)
#12. To: Dakmar (#11)
#13. To: Dakmar (#9)
-Alex Kurtagic
#14. To: X-15 (#13)
#23 seems to be race ready still.
“The most dangerous man to any government is the man who is able to think things out... without regard to the prevailing superstitions and taboos. Almost inevitably he comes to the conclusion that the government he lives under is dishonest, insane, intolerable.” ~ H. L. Mencken
#15. To: X-15 (#13)
First car that caught my eye today was an almost flat black Fairlane 500 Cobra about like this one: If that don't frighten the neighbors I don't know what will :) 
corruptissima re publica plurimae leges - Tacitus
#16. To: Lod (#14)
And for about 140K it's yours to drive as you please :) #23 seems to be race ready still.
corruptissima re publica plurimae leges - Tacitus
#17. To: Dakmar (#16)
Yikes! that would make quite a dent in the petty-cash drawer...I'll have to pass, thanks.
“The most dangerous man to any government is the man who is able to think things out... without regard to the prevailing superstitions and taboos. Almost inevitably he comes to the conclusion that the government he lives under is dishonest, insane, intolerable.” ~ H. L. Mencken
#18. To: Dakmar (#16)
This particular Shelby is 900k: http://www.fraserdante.com/4440%20-%2065%20GT350%20R%20Code%20Race%20-% 20Kemp/65%20Kemp.html "Summary: will be sold at RM Auctions for the prestigious Amelia Island Concours Weekend March 2014, see professional photos by Haigwood Studios (LINK), perfect collector and investment piece or Pebble Beach Vintage Race car, ready for the Monterey Historics August 2014, original Bill of Sale issued to Kemp when he bought from the first owner, Roger West, in 1967, (LINK), the MSO, full SAAC documents are all included, (LINK) on March 8, 2014, this famous 1965 Shelby GT 350 ‘R’ Code Race Car will cross the block at RM Amelia Island at The Ritz in prime time, the estimate is at the $900,000 to $1,100,000 figure, a fantastic car since other ’65 ‘R’ Models have sold in this range do not have the rare original body nor the race history, shown at Fraser Dante in Atlanta until that time, collectors and racers are welcome to view this piece of history." (too long for auto-link)
-Alex Kurtagic
#19. To: Dakmar (#15)
Check out this rare Ford, these were all at the SCAT 2015 show: 
-Alex Kurtagic
#20. To: X-15 (#18)
amazing rides -
“The most dangerous man to any government is the man who is able to think things out... without regard to the prevailing superstitions and taboos. Almost inevitably he comes to the conclusion that the government he lives under is dishonest, insane, intolerable.” ~ H. L. Mencken
#21. To: Lod (#20)
They've got some nice cars!!
-Alex Kurtagic
#22. To: X-15, Lod (#19)
I am become death 
corruptissima re publica plurimae leges - Tacitus
#23. To: Dakmar (#22)
It looks FMC, but I haven't a clue what it is...help! Wow!
“The most dangerous man to any government is the man who is able to think things out... without regard to the prevailing superstitions and taboos. Almost inevitably he comes to the conclusion that the government he lives under is dishonest, insane, intolerable.” ~ H. L. Mencken
#24. To: Lod (#23)
70 or 71 Torino
corruptissima re publica plurimae leges - Tacitus
#25. To: Dakmar, Lod (#24)
Did you know that you could order a Torino Squire station wagon with a 429CJ? 
-Alex Kurtagic
#26. To: X-15, Dakmar, drivers, 4 (#25)
Whoa! that was when you went to the dealership and chose your engine, transmission, differential, and each and every other option that you wanted. And there were tons of boxes to be checked; it was great.
“The most dangerous man to any government is the man who is able to think things out... without regard to the prevailing superstitions and taboos. Almost inevitably he comes to the conclusion that the government he lives under is dishonest, insane, intolerable.” ~ H. L. Mencken
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