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Religion
See other Religion Articles

Title: Blondes To Go Extinct In 200 Years
Source: www.eightballmagazine.com
URL Source: http://www.eightballmagazine.com/diatribes/volume02/039/801.html
Published: Mar 22, 2006
Author: by Nkrumah Steward
Post Date: 2006-03-22 11:49:47 by Mind_Virus
Keywords: Blondes, Extinct, Years
Views: 740
Comments: 57

Blondes To Go Extinct In 200 Years

"raw dogma" by Nkrumah Steward, creator of http://8BM.com

I got to thinking. Yeah, you know you are in trouble when that starts happening. German researchers predict that by 2202 natural blondes will be extinct from the planet. The last natural blonde they predict will be born somewhere in Finland in 2202.

Apparently there are so few natural blonde haired, blue eyed people walking around that there aren’t enough people with the gene to keep passing on the recessive gene. I didn’t know this but in order for a child to have natural blonde hair, it must have the gene on both sides of the family in the grandparents' generation. Well this got me thinking.

I am sure that by 2202, at the rate that we are making scientific breakthroughs, designing children will be common place. We will be flipping on and off genes in our unborn children like light switches.

With people literally designing their own children before they are born will blondes really go the way of the dodo bird?

If we can design our children, as in actually determine whether or not they will have brown eyes or blue eyes, be tall or short, have straight teeth or big hands, then won’t we also be able to turn off certain genes that make us prone to certain hereditary diseases?

And if that is a real life practical benefit that comes with designing our children, wouldn’t it be unethical to have children naturally at that point? I know this sounds weird but wouldn’t it be kind cruel to have a child without tinkering about with the genes and whatnot? I mean if you could spare your children a real health problem that runs in your family like hyper tension or heart disease wouldn’t it be the moral choice to do so?

I am not saying make it illegal to have a kid naturally, but if you can spare them preventable hereditary diseases, why not?

What do you have against sparing your kid from losing a big toe to diabetes by the time he is 12?

If you are the type of person that doesn’t like to make decisions without thinking about how it will impact your pocket book consider this.

I am sure insurance premiums would be less for children that had certain hereditary diseases “turned off” than insuring children that did not. They would be less of an insurance risk wouldn’t they?

And I am sure the Jesus freak would pop his head out of the ground long enough to tell us that it is wrong to design your children, not that the Bible would have anything to say about this issue seeing that biogenetic engineering wasn’t quite around when the Bible was written and all of its principle characters were dictating the word of God.

Who incidentally didn’t offer an opinion on anything that didn't concern them at the time. And considering that they still thought that sacrifcing goats was the way to God's heart I seriously doubt they were interested in God's take on biogentic engeering.

But I am sure they wouldn’t let that stop them from saying that only God should determine what a kid should look like and what diseases he or she should be prone to get.

But God isn’t doing that now. That isn’t his job. The only person that thinks that God is the one who determines if your kid is born with your eyes or your wife’s eyes probably would say that water didn’t refract light either until God decided to leave us a rainbow as a nice reminder that he promises not to try to drown us all to death again like he did during the Great deluge.

In fact, saying that God is the one making those determinations for us is speaking from ignorance.

Genetics are making those determinations for us, not God. If God was making those determinations then tweaking a gene here or there wouldn’t be doing anyone any bit of good. In fact, we wouldn’t know anything from studying genetics because God would be making things up as he went along. Sometimes black people would have Asian looking kids sometimes they wouldn’t. Whether or not your kid came out looking like the mailman would be “purely coincidental” like it says in movie disclaimers.

But that isn’t the case is it? Polygamy and incest happy Utahans are knee deep in rare and bizarre deformations and horrific hereditary diseases because genetics determines more about a child’s physical being than God does.

You can only screw your brothers and sisters for so long before it shows, if you know what I mean?

That’s why I contend that real blondes aren’t going anywhere…even if in the future real blondes are going to be designed whether than decided whom your grand parents are.

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#7. To: Mind_Virus (#0)

Blondes To Go Extinct In 200 Years

Only if the peroxide runs out in 200 years.

Our ancestors fought and died for their liberties and ours. If we are worthy of them, we must be prepared to do likewise.

Peetie Wheatstraw  posted on  2006-03-22   19:14:21 ET  Reply   Trace   Private Reply  


#8. To: swarthyguy (#3)

2. There's always hair dye.

Tell me about it. I've known women who have frosted their roots so many times that the peroxide has soaked into their gray matter. Blonde....straight through the fucking skull.

"These aren't the droids you're looking for...

orangedog  posted on  2006-03-22   19:18:06 ET  Reply   Trace   Private Reply  


#9. To: christine, Zipporah (#6)

i was a blonde baby, but now i'm brown with gold highlights. i do believe we have one or two blonds around here though. :P

That's a great idea for a thread: a membership baby photo contest.

Our ancestors fought and died for their liberties and ours. If we are worthy of them, we must be prepared to do likewise.

Peetie Wheatstraw  posted on  2006-03-22   19:20:55 ET  Reply   Trace   Private Reply  


#10. To: christine (#6)

i do believe we have one or two blonds around here though. :P

OK, let's start with the blonde jokes!:

"These aren't the droids you're looking for...

orangedog  posted on  2006-03-22   19:24:56 ET  Reply   Trace   Private Reply  


#11. To: Peetie Wheatstraw (#9)

we did that on the Freeoples thread (this was the gang i recruited from Lucianne's forum in 2k) on FR years ago. it was fun. the problem is a lot of people don't have their baby pics on their computers to post!

The WTC couldn't have come down without a conspiracy. The perps weren't exactly working independent of each other.~Arete

christine  posted on  2006-03-22   19:25:53 ET  Reply   Trace   Private Reply  


#12. To: orangedog (#10)

cute! :P

The WTC couldn't have come down without a conspiracy. The perps weren't exactly working independent of each other.~Arete

christine  posted on  2006-03-22   19:27:37 ET  Reply   Trace   Private Reply  


#13. To: christine (#11)

the problem is a lot of people don't have their baby pics on their computers to post!

Those are just the ones who weren't cute when they were little....

Our ancestors fought and died for their liberties and ours. If we are worthy of them, we must be prepared to do likewise.

Peetie Wheatstraw  posted on  2006-03-22   19:29:12 ET  Reply   Trace   Private Reply  


#14. To: christine (#6)

i do believe we have one or two blonds around here though. :P

"I aim to misbehave" -- Mal Reynolds, Firefly

YertleTurtle  posted on  2006-03-22   19:32:15 ET  (1 image) Reply   Trace   Private Reply  


#15. To: christine (#12)

911 Dispatcher: "Yes, can I help you?"

Blonde: "Hello? Uh, my house is on fire! Can you help me?"

911 Dispatcher: "Sure, I'll page the fire department. Just tell me how they can get there."

Blonde: "Duh!! Big Red Truck!"

"These aren't the droids you're looking for...

orangedog  posted on  2006-03-22   19:34:07 ET  Reply   Trace   Private Reply  


#16. To: orangedog (#10)

Q: What's the difference between a prostitute, a nymphomaniac, and a blonde?
A: The prostitute says, "Aren't you done yet?"
The nympho says, "Are you done already?"
The blonde says, "Beige...I think I'll paint the ceiling beige."

Our ancestors fought and died for their liberties and ours. If we are worthy of them, we must be prepared to do likewise.

Peetie Wheatstraw  posted on  2006-03-22   19:34:33 ET  Reply   Trace   Private Reply  


#17. To: YertleTurtle, Peetie Wheatstraw (#14)

Me at 3 after my Italian barber grandpa hatcheted my bangs. ;)

The WTC couldn't have come down without a conspiracy. The perps weren't exactly working independent of each other.~Arete

christine  posted on  2006-03-22   19:37:04 ET  (1 image) Reply   Trace   Private Reply  


#18. To: orangedog (#15)

Q: Why do blondes have TGIF on their shoes?
A1: Toes Go In First.
A2: Tits Go In Front.

Our ancestors fought and died for their liberties and ours. If we are worthy of them, we must be prepared to do likewise.

Peetie Wheatstraw  posted on  2006-03-22   19:37:22 ET  Reply   Trace   Private Reply  


#19. To: christine (#17)

Wow, chris: "Cute then--cute now!" ;)

Our ancestors fought and died for their liberties and ours. If we are worthy of them, we must be prepared to do likewise.

Peetie Wheatstraw  posted on  2006-03-22   19:38:14 ET  Reply   Trace   Private Reply  


#20. To: christine (#17)

Here's mine - ain't I cute???

CAPPSMADNESS  posted on  2006-03-22   19:40:05 ET  (1 image) Reply   Trace   Private Reply  


#21. To: CAPPSMADNESS (#20)

Just darlin'.. LOL!!

Zipporah  posted on  2006-03-22   19:41:15 ET  Reply   Trace   Private Reply  


#22. To: Peetie Wheatstraw (#18)

A2--too funny.

The WTC couldn't have come down without a conspiracy. The perps weren't exactly working independent of each other.~Arete

christine  posted on  2006-03-22   19:42:04 ET  Reply   Trace   Private Reply  


#23. To: CAPPSMADNESS (#20)

cracking up! you win...hands down.

The WTC couldn't have come down without a conspiracy. The perps weren't exactly working independent of each other.~Arete

christine  posted on  2006-03-22   19:42:33 ET  Reply   Trace   Private Reply  


#24. To: christine (#23)

I ain't a blonde tho... But what do you think about my earring holders???

CAPPSMADNESS  posted on  2006-03-22   19:44:40 ET  Reply   Trace   Private Reply  


#25. To: christine (#22)

Q: What is the best blonde secretary in the world to have?
A: One that never misses a period.

Q: What did the blonde customer say to the buxom waitress after she read her name tag ?
A: "'Debbie'...that's cute. What did you name the other one ?"

Our ancestors fought and died for their liberties and ours. If we are worthy of them, we must be prepared to do likewise.

Peetie Wheatstraw  posted on  2006-03-22   19:45:13 ET  Reply   Trace   Private Reply  


#26. To: All (#24)

Stop with the jokes and post yer pic! I did!

CAPPSMADNESS  posted on  2006-03-22   19:46:48 ET  Reply   Trace   Private Reply  


#27. To: Peetie Wheatstraw (#19)

thank you..ok, you started this. let's see yours! ;)

The WTC couldn't have come down without a conspiracy. The perps weren't exactly working independent of each other.~Arete

christine  posted on  2006-03-22   19:49:11 ET  Reply   Trace   Private Reply  


#28. To: CAPPSMADNESS (#24)

you're the cutest baby i've ever seen!

The WTC couldn't have come down without a conspiracy. The perps weren't exactly working independent of each other.~Arete

christine  posted on  2006-03-22   19:50:03 ET  Reply   Trace   Private Reply  


#29. To: Peetie Wheatstraw (#25)

# 25 was for you - and what Chris said!!!

CAPPSMADNESS  posted on  2006-03-22   19:50:34 ET  Reply   Trace   Private Reply  


#30. To: christine (#28)

My mom thought so too - God Bless her....

;0)

CAPPSMADNESS  posted on  2006-03-22   19:51:26 ET  Reply   Trace   Private Reply  


#31. To: christine (#27)

thank you..ok, you started this. let's see yours! ;)

My favorite activity when I was a "little nipper"---still one of my favorites!

Our ancestors fought and died for their liberties and ours. If we are worthy of them, we must be prepared to do likewise.

Peetie Wheatstraw  posted on  2006-03-22   19:55:01 ET  (1 image) Reply   Trace   Private Reply  


#32. To: Peetie Wheatstraw (#31)

Are you still toothless and bald???

;0)

CAPPSMADNESS  posted on  2006-03-22   19:59:21 ET  Reply   Trace   Private Reply  


#33. To: CAPPSMADNESS (#32)

Are you still toothless and bald???

Something only my mother could love! ;)

Our ancestors fought and died for their liberties and ours. If we are worthy of them, we must be prepared to do likewise.

Peetie Wheatstraw  posted on  2006-03-22   20:01:39 ET  Reply   Trace   Private Reply  


#34. To: christine (#32)

Well, didn't we agree that the people who didn't have their own baby pictures on their computer weren't cute anyway when they were little...? ;)

Our ancestors fought and died for their liberties and ours. If we are worthy of them, we must be prepared to do likewise.

Peetie Wheatstraw  posted on  2006-03-22   20:03:58 ET  Reply   Trace   Private Reply  


#35. To: christine (#17)

That pic is too cute. God Bless Grandpas.

Littlelisa  posted on  2006-03-22   20:11:26 ET  Reply   Trace   Private Reply  


#36. To: Littlelisa (#35)

my mother was not pleased. ;)

The WTC couldn't have come down without a conspiracy. The perps weren't exactly working independent of each other.~Arete

christine  posted on  2006-03-22   20:23:34 ET  Reply   Trace   Private Reply  


#37. To: Mind_Virus, All (#0)

A blonde is sitting in the dentist chair.

Dentist: Please remove your headphones.
Blonde: I'll die if I take them off.
Dentist: You won't die. Take them off.
Blonde: Please don't make me do that. I'll die.
Dentist: You won't die. I promise.

The blonde takes off the headphones. The dentist starts to work on her teeth. A few minutes later she falls to the floor and dies. He can't believe it. He puts her headphones on to hear what was so important.

"...breathe in...breathe out...breathe in...breathe out..."

When prosperity comes, do not use all of it. - Confucious
The nation is prosperous on the whole, but how much prosperity is there in a hole? - Will Rogers
There are 9,000 hedge funds out there. There aren't that many smart people in the world. - Michael Driscoll, a trader at Bear Stearns & Co. in New York
Some days you just want to pull out the Bonehead Stick and beat people senseless. - mirage

markm0722  posted on  2006-03-22   20:37:20 ET  Reply   Trace   Private Reply  


#38. To: christine (#36)

LOL, but, you still were adorable.

Littlelisa  posted on  2006-03-22   20:41:12 ET  Reply   Trace   Private Reply  


#39. To: CAPPSMADNESS, christine (#32)

Why blondes shouldn't smoke:

Our ancestors fought and died for their liberties and ours. If we are worthy of them, we must be prepared to do likewise.

Peetie Wheatstraw  posted on  2006-03-22   20:54:27 ET  (1 image) Reply   Trace   Private Reply  


#40. To: Mind_Virus (#0)

Blondes To Go Extinct In 200 Years

If this is the case, maybe Debra LaFave should hook up with me so we can pop out a few real soon. ;0)

“If a nation or an individual values anything more than freedom, it will lose its freedom; and the irony is that if it is comfort or money it values more, it will lose that too.” W. Somerset Maugham

BTP Holdings  posted on  2006-03-22   21:00:17 ET  Reply   Trace   Private Reply  


#41. To: Littlelisa (#38)

thank you :)

The WTC couldn't have come down without a conspiracy. The perps weren't exactly working independent of each other.~Arete

christine  posted on  2006-03-22   21:06:14 ET  Reply   Trace   Private Reply  


#42. To: christine (#6)

i do believe we have one or two blonds around here though. :P

I have heard EVERY blonde joke there is too.

Impeach Bush. The man was lost and then he was found and now he's more lost than ever -- and he's taking us into the darkness with him. It's time to remove him. By Garrison Keillor [2006-03-01]

justlurking  posted on  2006-03-22   21:24:08 ET  Reply   Trace   Private Reply  


#43. To: Peetie Wheatstraw (#18)

Q: Why do blondes have TGIF on their shoes? A1: Toes Go In First. A2: Tits Go In Front.

Let's amend that...

Q: Why do OLDER blondes have TGIF painted on their shoes?
A: Tits Go In First.

who knows what evil  posted on  2006-03-22   21:56:21 ET  Reply   Trace   Private Reply  


#44. To: justlurking, christine (#42)

Cute pic!

A brunette, a redhead and a blonde are stranded on an island w/ no fresh water or food 20 miles from the nearest mainland. They decide each should try to swim for it one at a time.

Brunette makes it 2 miles and drowns. Redhead makes it 5 miles and drowns.

Blond swims 10 miles, gets tired, and swims back to the island.



Law Enforcement Against Prohibition

IndieTX  posted on  2006-03-22   23:15:30 ET  Reply   Trace   Private Reply  


#45. To: Peetie Wheatstraw, All (#16)

Diana  posted on  2006-03-22   23:59:10 ET  Reply   Trace   Private Reply  


#46. To: Diana (#45)

Right, all women are whores and sluts and nymphos, whatever.

Can we please move on now that we have that established?

It's getting to the point where this forum is changing into a pervert site. I'm sure there are plenty of forums and chat rooms and such devoted to that sort of thing.

Ma'am, I did not say all women were whores and sluts and nymphos. I did not mean to give you offense by the blond joke that I pulled off a website, and I am sure you did not mean offense by language implying that I was a "pervert."

Now that we've established that, I encourage you to "bozo" me since I would rather not read posts from you attacking me again. I will return the favor forthwith.

Our ancestors fought and died for their liberties and ours. If we are worthy of them, we must be prepared to do likewise.

Peetie Wheatstraw  posted on  2006-03-23   0:05:38 ET  Reply   Trace   Private Reply  


#47. To: Diana (#45)

It's getting to the point where this forum is changing into a pervert site.

?? the whole forum?

for peetie's sake, it was just a joke, Diana! ;)

I'm not ready to make nice--Natalie Maines

christine  posted on  2006-03-23   0:09:18 ET  Reply   Trace   Private Reply  



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