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Title: Boss Warns All New Employees He Will Fire Them Immediately If People On Twitter Tell Him To
Source: Babylon Bee
URL Source: https://babylonbee.com/news/boss-wa ... -people-on-twitter-tell-him-to
Published: Sep 28, 2021
Author: satire
Post Date: 2021-09-28 10:04:43 by Ada
Keywords: None
Views: 588
Comments: 7

PALO ALTO, CA—According to sources, Tito Gourdwhack, CEO of WeebyHQ Software Solutions, is a very socially conscious business leader who prides himself on using his wealth and influence to make the world a better place, just like Google and Facebook.

For this reason, he is always sure to tell every one of his new employees he will fire them at the drop of a hat if people on Twitter ever want him to.

"To be a good and moral person, it's important to always obey what mobs on Twitter say to you," he said to his reflection in the bathroom mirror, which is the only thing he can get to look him in the eyes. "Everyone knows that Twitter people are the greatest voice for truth and decency the world has ever seen, especially when they get together in mobs."

Every morning, Gourdwhack goes into the office early to search Twitter for the names of his employees to see if any online moral busybodies want him to fire anyone.

"I may be the boss of my company, but Twitter is the boss of me," he said. "I will gladly destroy the lives of anyone who works for me to preserve my image as a good progressive person. If I find out anyone in my office is on the wrong side of history, I fire them on the spot without question. It's just the right thing to do."

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#1. To: Ada (#0)

He can threaten and he can go out of business and without competent employees, he will go out of business.

DWornock  posted on  2021-09-28   11:18:59 ET  Reply   Trace   Private Reply  


#2. To: Ada (#0)

Funny parody of the insanity running high these days

“With the exception of Whites, the rule among the peoples of the world, whether residing in their homelands or settled in Western democracies, is ethnocentrism and moral particularism: they stick together and good means what is good for their ethnic group."
-Alex Kurtagic

 photo 001g.gif

X-15  posted on  2021-09-28   12:26:33 ET  Reply   Trace   Private Reply  


#3. To: DWornock (#1)

It's the Bee.

“ On some great and glorious day the plain folks of the land will reach their heart's desire at last, and the White House will be adorned by a downright moron. ” ~ H. L. Mencken

Lod  posted on  2021-09-28   12:51:24 ET  Reply   Trace   Private Reply  


#4. To: Lod (#3)

It's the Bee.

It's almost impossible to tell anymore. About got me too.

The light that burns twice as bright, burns half as long. - Dr. Eldon Tyrell

Godfrey Smith: Mike, I wouldn't worry. Prosperity is just around the corner.
Mike Flaherty: Yeah, it's been there a long time. I wish I knew which corner.
My Man Godfrey (1936)

Esso  posted on  2021-09-28   12:58:54 ET  Reply   Trace   Private Reply  


#5. To: Esso (#4)

Tito Gourdwhack?

Come'on, man.

“ On some great and glorious day the plain folks of the land will reach their heart's desire at last, and the White House will be adorned by a downright moron. ” ~ H. L. Mencken

Lod  posted on  2021-09-28   15:21:46 ET  Reply   Trace   Private Reply  


#6. To: Lod (#5)

Tito Gourdwhack?

That's what brought me back to my senses.

The light that burns twice as bright, burns half as long. - Dr. Eldon Tyrell

Godfrey Smith: Mike, I wouldn't worry. Prosperity is just around the corner.
Mike Flaherty: Yeah, it's been there a long time. I wish I knew which corner.
My Man Godfrey (1936)

Esso  posted on  2021-09-28   15:26:18 ET  Reply   Trace   Private Reply  


#7. To: Ada (#0)

For the greater good. If it saves just one life. My pronouns are dumb/stupid/shit

Love the bee.

______________________________________

Suspect all media / resist bad propaganda/Learn NLP everyday everyway ;) If you don't control your mind someone else will.

titorite  posted on  2021-09-28   16:12:19 ET  Reply   Trace   Private Reply  


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