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Title: Texas Annexes Oklahoma, Turns Entire State Into One Giant Buc-ee's
Source: Babylon Bee
URL Source: https://babylonbee.com/news/texas-a ... e-state-into-one-giant-buc-ees
Published: Jan 5, 2022
Author: Babylon Bee
Post Date: 2022-01-05 15:23:43 by Esso
Keywords: None
Views: 119
Comments: 2

OKLAHOMA—Texas has announced the unilateral annexation of Oklahoma. The entire state will be leveled and turned into one giant Buc-ee's convenience store, according to sources within the Texas state government.

The move was made as part of an attempt to find a use for the state to the north of Texas, as it seemed to just be acres and acres of nothing worthwhile.

"There, that's a far better use of these 7,000 useless square miles," said Texas Governor Greg Abbott as bulldozers began demolishing the trailer parks, exotic cat zoos, and lame gas stations with fewer than 48 pumps that made up the state of Oklahoma. "Finally -- weary travelers just passing through Oklahoma can experience fine refreshments, plenty of gas pumps, and extremely tasty snacks."

Abbott then bit into a glazed pistachio. "Oh, man. This is to die for."

The governor then cut a ribbon with a bayonet attached to an AR-15, officially opening the massive Buc-ee's. The new fueling station has 800,000,000 pumps, 50,000 barbecue pits, hundreds of square miles of delicious flavored nuts, and over 10,000,000 of the cleanest bathrooms you'll ever use.

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#1. To: Esso (#0)

I wish that whoever is running Buc-ee's was running TX.

Abbott's sac'o nuts has gone rancid.

“ On some great and glorious day the plain folks of the land will reach their heart's desire at last, and the White House will be adorned by a downright moron. ” ~ H. L. Mencken

Lod  posted on  2022-01-05   15:47:49 ET  Reply   Trace   Private Reply  


#2. To: Lod, TX4s, 4um (#1)

LOL!

The light that burns twice as bright, burns half as long. - Dr. Eldon Tyrell

Godfrey Smith: Mike, I wouldn't worry. Prosperity is just around the corner.
Mike Flaherty: Yeah, it's been there a long time. I wish I knew which corner.
My Man Godfrey (1936)

Esso  posted on  2022-01-05   15:54:08 ET  Reply   Trace   Private Reply  


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