[Home]  [Headlines]  [Latest Articles]  [Latest Comments]  [Post]  [Sign-in]  [Mail]  [Setup]  [Help] 

Status: Not Logged In; Sign In

FBI Stopped Iranian Plot To Assassinate Trump

"We Won't Be Certifying The Election..."

John Lott: The FBI and Media Don’t Tell You How Many Lives Guns SAVE

Watch This Amazing Compilation of Elon Musk Owning Libtard “Journalists”

Trump Outlines Plan To Decimate The Deep State

Trump Outlines Plan To Decimate The Deep State

Jack Smith Tucks Tail, Halts Trump Case As House GOP Demands He 'Preserve Records'

Feds Raid Alfie Oakes’ Naples Home and Farm with Battering Ram

Democrats Have a New Leader: Kamala Is Out, Says GOP Strategist

The Colorado Voting Machine Fiasco

Trump Lawyer WARNS Letitia James, Vows RETRIBUTION After Trump Win: 'We'll Put Your Fat A** In JAIL'

Tucker Carlson:11/7/2024 "now that Trump is president, i can tell you everything"

Fear-Stricken Pharma Big-Wigs Convene Emergency Teleconference to Thwart RFK Jr.

Judge strikes down Joe Biden administration program aimed at easing citizenship pathway for some undocumented immigrants

CNN faces another defamation lawsuit after appeals court sides with Project Veritas

These Hollywood Celebrities Swore They'd Leave America If Trump Won All Talk, No Walk

Blaze News original: Border Patrol whistleblower's career on the line after spotlighting trafficking horrors

Dems open can of worms by asking about millions of 2020 Biden voters who somehow disappeared in 2024

Deadline: US says Israel failing in aid efforts. What happens now?

Kash Patel, Rumored Pick for CIA Chief, Announces Massive Declassification Will Occur

Hezbollah unveils ‘Fateh 110’ ballistic missile in targeting Israeli sites

Pentagon running low on air-defense missiles as Israel, Ukraine gobble up remaining supplies

An Open Letter To Elon Musk

Is this why Trump was allowed to win?

This Is The Median Home Price In Each US State

Alex Soros Shocked That the Incumbent Political Order Is Being Crushed Around The Globe

Beverly Hills Lawyer Disbarred Two Years After Admitting He Paid a Ringer to Take the Bar

Lumumba: 'I am not guilty, and so I will not proceed as a guilty man.'

Lauren Boebert Wins House Election After Switching to More Conservative Colorado District

AIPAC Boasts of Influence Over Congress, Ousting 'Eleven Anti-Israel Candidates'


ObamaNation
See other ObamaNation Articles

Title: White House Cat Already Tired Of Being Blamed For All These Accidents On Oval Office Carpet
Source: Babylon Bee
URL Source: https://babylonbee.com/news/white-h ... ccidents-on-oval-office-carpet
Published: Feb 1, 2022
Author: Babylon Bee
Post Date: 2022-02-01 13:56:12 by Esso
Keywords: None
Views: 115
Comments: 1

WASHINGTON, D.C.—First Lady Jill Biden has announced that the White House has welcomed a new pet, a cat named Willow. Initial reports indicate that things are not going quite as planned from Willow’s perspective, as she is blamed for all the messes on the Oval Office carpet.

“What on Earth is that foul odor in here?!” said Chief Of Staff Ronald Klain walking into the Oval Office. “It smells absolutely horrific!”

“Oh um, well see, that's just our uh new cat Willow,” said Biden nervously trying to cover up the considerably large stain for a young kitten. “We’ve been trying to potty train her, but she just keeps having accidents. What can you do? Heh!”

Despite only living in the Oval Office for a few days, Willow has already been blamed for numerous "accidents" on the Oval Office carpet. Some of Willow’s messes have even occurred when she wasn’t even around the Oval Office that day.

Sources claim that while Willow was initially honored and excited about being the White House’s First Feline Of The United States, the cat is now suspecting she’s just there as a scapegoat.

At publishing time, Willow had somehow managed to ruin the carpet on Air Force One.

Post Comment   Private Reply   Ignore Thread  


TopPage UpFull ThreadPage DownBottom/Latest

#1. To: All (#0)

fakemaskworldwide.com/

FAKE MASKS WORLDWIDE

FAQ | Frequently Asked Questions

Q: Do these masks stop the spread or protect you from Covid-19?

A: No. Our masks do not stop the spread of COVID-19 and will not protect you from it either.

Q: Do you ship to Canada?

A: Yes, but we urge you to purchase through our exclusive Canadian distributor, www.oxyflowpro.com/ for ultra fast and free shipping to Canada.

Q: Where’s my order?

A: After you've placed your order with us - We then send out an automated email which contains your order details. Once shipped, a second email with tracking information will be sent.

If you are unable to see this email, we advise you to check your spam folder - as it may be automatically directed there.

If you are still unable to view your order - you can use our live customer service feature on this website for more information and assistance. Or, use our “contact us” form on our website to send us an email and our team will get back to you shortly.

Q: How long will it take to get my order?

STANDARD USPS SHIPPING

A: Estimated delivery time is between 3-5 business days from the time of shipment. You can track your order using the tracking number that is sent via email at the time of your purchase.

UPS EXPEDITED SHIPPING

A: All UPS expedited orders are processed immediately within business hours.

All orders are then processed and prepared with fulfillment. All UPS expedited orders are shipped with UPS 2-Day Air shipping.

Estimated delivery time is between 24-48 business hours from the time of shipment. You can track your order using the tracking number that is sent via email at the time of your purchase.

Please Note: We ship out incoming orders Monday-Friday during business hours.

ACCEPTED METHODS OF PAYMENT

Q: What methods of payment do you accept?

A: We accept the following methods of payment (Listed Below)

Visa

Mastercard

Amex

Discover

JB Card

Diners Club

MASK MATERIALS

Q: What are your masks made out of?

A:

Adjustable/Double Incognito: 90% nylon / 10% spandex **extremely soft!!**

Incognito Mask: 90% nylon / 10% spandex **extremely soft!!** *This also includes our X-Small Sizes (Double/Incognito)*

Offensively Fake Mask: 100% polyester

All of our masks are proudly made in the USA!

Q: What is the size of the mask?

A: Ear to Ear

Adjustable Double Incognito: 9 Inches to 16 Inches

Double Incognito: 12.5 Inches

Incognito: 12.5 inches

Offensive: 11.5 inches

Double X-Small: 9.5 Inches

X-Small: 9.5 inches

BULK ORDERS

Q: Do you offer bulk purchasing options?

A: We do offer bulk purchasing options.

You must purchase 50+ units (Masks) to receive wholesale pricing - Pricing list below.

Incognito: $4.00 Per Unit

Offensive: $4.00 Per Unit

X-Small Double Incognito: $4.00 Per Unit

X-Small Incognito: $4.00 Per Unit

Double Incognito: $4.00 Per Unit

Adjustable Double Incognito: $5.00 Per Unit

Gaiter: $6.00 Per Unit

CARE INSTRUCTIONS

Q: How do I wash my masks?

A: Listed below are our recommendations on how to care for your Fake Mask.

Our 'Offensively Fake Mask' is more delicate, hand wash extremely delicately & lay flat to dry.

Our 'Double/Incognito Fake Mask' is OK to machine wash (we would recommend a more delicate cycle) & lay flat to dry or tumble dry low.

Our 'The Real-Fake Neck Gaiter' is OK to machine wash (we would recommend a more delicate cycle) & lay flat to dry or tumble dry low.

The light that burns twice as bright, burns half as long. - Dr. Eldon Tyrell

Godfrey Smith: Mike, I wouldn't worry. Prosperity is just around the corner.
Mike Flaherty: Yeah, it's been there a long time. I wish I knew which corner.
My Man Godfrey (1936)

Esso  posted on  2022-02-01   14:01:26 ET  Reply   Trace   Private Reply  


TopPage UpFull ThreadPage DownBottom/Latest


[Home]  [Headlines]  [Latest Articles]  [Latest Comments]  [Post]  [Sign-in]  [Mail]  [Setup]  [Help]