[Home]  [Headlines]  [Latest Articles]  [Latest Comments]  [Post]  [Sign-in]  [Mail]  [Setup]  [Help] 

Status: Not Logged In; Sign In

The long-awaited federal crackdown on illegal alien crime in Chicago has finally arrived.

Cash Jordan: ICE BLOCKS 'Cartel Caravan'... HAULS 'Army of Illegals' BACK TO MEXICO

Berenson On Black Violence, Woke Lies, & Right-Wing Rage

What the Professor omitted about the collapse of the American Empire.

Israel Tried to Kill Hamas in Qatar — Here’s What REALLY Happened

Katie Hopkins: Laurence Fox and my beaver. NOT FOR THE WEAK

Government Accidentally Reveals Someone Inside Twitter Fabricated 'Gotcha' Accounts To Frame Conservative Firebrand

The Magna Carta Of 2022 – Worldwide Declaration of Freedom

Hamas Accuses Trump Of A Set-Up In Doha, After 5 Leaders Killed In Israeli Strike

Cash Jordan: Angry Voters Go “Shelter To Shelter”... EMPTYING 13 Migrant Hotels In 2 Hours

Israel targets Hamas leadership in attack on Qatar’s Doha, group says no members killed

Israeli Finance Minister Bezalel Smotrich said on Monday that villages in the Israeli-occupied West Bank should look like cities in Gaza

FBI Arrests 22 Chinese, 4 Pharma Companies, Preventing Disaster That Could Kill 70 Million Americans

911 Make Believe

New CLARITY Act Draft Could Shield Crypto Developers From Past Liability

Chicago Builds a Wall To Protect Illegal ALiens From Ice

Sens. Scott, Johnson Launch Investigation into Palisades Fire; Demand Newsom's Cooperation

"Go Talk To Bill Gates About Me": How JP Morgan Enabled Jeffrey Epstein's Crimes, Snagged Netanyahu Meeting

Cash Jordan: Looters EMPTY Chicago Mall... as Mayor's 'No Arrests' Policy BACKFIRES

Caitlin Johnstone: They Just Bombed Greta Thunberg's Boat

Democrats MELTDOWN Over RFK Jr.

Bill Gates, Truth About Vaccines, & Big Pharma’s Plot to Destroy Doctors Who Question ”The Science”

Supreme Court upholds 'roving patrols' for immigration stops in Los Angeles

MN Gunman’s Pot Use Is Further Evidence Against Rescheduling Marijuana

Intense Exercise is Best

New Cars Are George Orwell 1984 Compliant

PEGASUS EVENT 201

Over Half Of Berlin's New Police Recruits Can't Speak Basic German, Officials Admit

Thomas Massie NAMES Epstein as a CIA and Israeli Asset

How Chickens See the World (Its CRAZIER Than You Think)


World News
See other World News Articles

Title: Purim Shpiel: To maintain Russia's favor, Israel sends Putin a nice fruit basket
Source: [None]
URL Source: https://www.msn.com/en-us/news/worl ... asket/ar-AAV9Max?ocid=msedgntp
Published: Mar 16, 2022
Author: JACKFRUIT BANANASSEY
Post Date: 2022-03-17 16:51:44 by BTP Holdings
Keywords: None
Views: 211
Comments: 1

Purim Shpiel: To maintain Russia's favor, Israel sends Putin a nice fruit basket

By JACKFRUIT BANANASSEY - 16 March 2022 3:36 PM

To maintain Russia's favor: Israel sends Putin a nice fruit basket
© Provided by The Jerusalem Post

redit: Courtesy Kremlin and Israel Fruit Growers Assoc.)

By utilizing information gathered from Israeli-produced spyware, NOSO, the Israeli government has decided that the best way to stay on Russia’s good side during the current geopolitical conflict is to present Eastern Europe’s grouchy tyrant with a fruit-based edible arrangement.

While war rages on in Ukraine, Israel finds itself in a complicated situation, as it simultaneously tries to stay on Putin’s good side while not looking like total lame wads to the United Nations.

“Honestly, I’m kind of at a loss,” expressed a crestfallen Prime Minister Naftali Bennett during a press conference detailing the measures taken until now to curry favor. Though the aggressive pseudo- dictator looked like he was having a fun time zipping around the Kremlin in the Little Tikes A-4 Skyhawk given to him by the Israeli Air Force, he seemed to be unreasonably enraged upon receiving the Communication Ministry’s singing telegram that exclusively performed “Putin on the Ritz.”

However, according to a confidential source at the prime minister’s barber shop, Bennett has a new plan that he is sure will win over the Russian president-for-life: Pineapple.

“It was during his weekly forehead polish,” said his barber, Paul D. Herr.

“He said that they’ve been working with a fancy, high-tech firm and that they’ve managed to listen in on all of Putin’s conversations during the last week, and they’ve figured out what makes him tick,” said Paul D. Herr.

The pineapple is on its way to Moscow in a brown paper bag, being carried by Minister Ze’ev Elkin, ending months of speculation about what he’s been toting to meeting with Putin as Bennett’s go-fer.

In a strictly off-the-record conversation with The Jerusalem Roast, MK Anat Reelman stated, “If this latest bribe doesn’t work, we may need to ask Bibi for some tips.”


Poster Comment:

Oy vey!

Post Comment   Private Reply   Ignore Thread  


TopPage UpFull ThreadPage DownBottom/Latest

#1. To: All (#0)

I can recall the local Synogogue in Chicago with a sign in mid 70s, "SAVE SOVIET JEWS. ;)

"When bad men combine, the good must associate; else they will fall, one by one." Edmund Burke

BTP Holdings  posted on  2022-03-17   16:55:30 ET  Reply   Trace   Private Reply  


TopPage UpFull ThreadPage DownBottom/Latest


[Home]  [Headlines]  [Latest Articles]  [Latest Comments]  [Post]  [Sign-in]  [Mail]  [Setup]  [Help]