[Home]  [Headlines]  [Latest Articles]  [Latest Comments]  [Post]  [Sign-in]  [Mail]  [Setup]  [Help] 

Status: Not Logged In; Sign In

The £4 supplement that could slash blood pressure - reducing stroke, dementia and heart attack risk

RFK Jr. to be involved in oversight of health and agriculture departments under second Trump admin

​​​​​​​"Keep Grinding": Elon Musk's America PAC Will Continue Anti-Soros Push Ahead Of Special Elections & Midterms

Johnny B Goode

Russian Hypersonic Advances Remain Beyond Western Reach

US Preps for War vs China, Dusts-Off Deserted WWII Air Bases

Spain on high alert as deadly storms loom: new flood risks in Barcelona, Majorca, Ibiza.

U.S. Publication Foreign Policy Says NATO Knows Ukraine Is Losing The War

Red Lobster and TGI Fridays are closing. Heres whats moving in

The United Nations is again warning of imminent famine in northern Gaza.

Israeli Drone Attack Targets Aid Distribution Center in Syria

Trump's new Cabinet picks, a Homan tribute, and Lizzo's giant toddler hand [Livestream in progress]

Russia and Iran Officially Link Their National Banking Systems

"They Just Got Handed Fraudulent Books" - Ed Dowd Confirms Our Warning That Trump Is 'Inheriting A Turd Of An Economy'

They're Getting Worse! 😂

'Forever Chemicals' In US Drinking Water: A Growing Problem

Ex-Trump aides warn Israeli ministers not to assume hell back annexation in 2nd term

Netanyahu seeks to delay taking the stand, citing lack of time to prepare during war

Google inadvertently reveals Kiev regimes aircraft stationed, operating from Poland

Taiwan Mulls Massive $15BN Arms Package To Signal Trump It's 'Serious' About Defense

Politician Against War

How do White people know your'e not a damn fool?

Trump Taps Rep. Mike Waltz For NatSec, Lee Zeldin As Head Of EPA

Top 3 Reasons Voters Gave For Not Supporting Harris: Poll

Trump Allies Push Richard Grenell For Secretary Of State

CNN Cheers As Top Kamala Staffer Calls For Jan. 6 "Disruption", Unelected Presidency

(Pt.1) New Border Czar, New Liberal Freak-Outs, MSM Hosts On Struggle Bus, & Megyn Kelly RIPS Celebs

Israel's Haifa Hit By One Of Largest Hezbollah Rocket Barrages Of War

Fury in Sweden at video of Syrian asylum seeker pushing a 91-year-old widow down stairs

Trump's plan will change EVERYTHING in The United States


World News
See other World News Articles

Title: Purim Shpiel: To maintain Russia's favor, Israel sends Putin a nice fruit basket
Source: [None]
URL Source: https://www.msn.com/en-us/news/worl ... asket/ar-AAV9Max?ocid=msedgntp
Published: Mar 16, 2022
Author: JACKFRUIT BANANASSEY
Post Date: 2022-03-17 16:51:44 by BTP Holdings
Keywords: None
Views: 127
Comments: 1

Purim Shpiel: To maintain Russia's favor, Israel sends Putin a nice fruit basket

By JACKFRUIT BANANASSEY - 16 March 2022 3:36 PM

To maintain Russia's favor: Israel sends Putin a nice fruit basket
© Provided by The Jerusalem Post

redit: Courtesy Kremlin and Israel Fruit Growers Assoc.)

By utilizing information gathered from Israeli-produced spyware, NOSO, the Israeli government has decided that the best way to stay on Russia’s good side during the current geopolitical conflict is to present Eastern Europe’s grouchy tyrant with a fruit-based edible arrangement.

While war rages on in Ukraine, Israel finds itself in a complicated situation, as it simultaneously tries to stay on Putin’s good side while not looking like total lame wads to the United Nations.

“Honestly, I’m kind of at a loss,” expressed a crestfallen Prime Minister Naftali Bennett during a press conference detailing the measures taken until now to curry favor. Though the aggressive pseudo- dictator looked like he was having a fun time zipping around the Kremlin in the Little Tikes A-4 Skyhawk given to him by the Israeli Air Force, he seemed to be unreasonably enraged upon receiving the Communication Ministry’s singing telegram that exclusively performed “Putin on the Ritz.”

However, according to a confidential source at the prime minister’s barber shop, Bennett has a new plan that he is sure will win over the Russian president-for-life: Pineapple.

“It was during his weekly forehead polish,” said his barber, Paul D. Herr.

“He said that they’ve been working with a fancy, high-tech firm and that they’ve managed to listen in on all of Putin’s conversations during the last week, and they’ve figured out what makes him tick,” said Paul D. Herr.

The pineapple is on its way to Moscow in a brown paper bag, being carried by Minister Ze’ev Elkin, ending months of speculation about what he’s been toting to meeting with Putin as Bennett’s go-fer.

In a strictly off-the-record conversation with The Jerusalem Roast, MK Anat Reelman stated, “If this latest bribe doesn’t work, we may need to ask Bibi for some tips.”


Poster Comment:

Oy vey!

Post Comment   Private Reply   Ignore Thread  


TopPage UpFull ThreadPage DownBottom/Latest

#1. To: All (#0)

I can recall the local Synogogue in Chicago with a sign in mid 70s, "SAVE SOVIET JEWS. ;)

"When bad men combine, the good must associate; else they will fall, one by one." Edmund Burke

BTP Holdings  posted on  2022-03-17   16:55:30 ET  Reply   Trace   Private Reply  


TopPage UpFull ThreadPage DownBottom/Latest


[Home]  [Headlines]  [Latest Articles]  [Latest Comments]  [Post]  [Sign-in]  [Mail]  [Setup]  [Help]