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Title: 12 Genius Ways For Congress To Pay Off The $31 Trillion National Debt
Source: [None]
URL Source: https://babylonbee.com/news/9-ways- ... -the-31-trillion-national-debt
Published: Oct 6, 2022
Author: BabylonBee.com
Post Date: 2022-10-06 10:04:08 by Ada
Keywords: None
Views: 45
Comments: 1

America's national debt just passed $31 trillion for the first time in history. Yikes! Don't worry though, we at The Babylon Bee have a few brilliant money-raising ideas up our sleeves that Congress probably hasn't heard of yet.

You're welcome, America!

Burn down the Lincoln Memorial for the insurance money: A foolproof plan.

Sell the moon to China for $31 trillion: Maybe throw in California for good measure. Nobody will miss it!

Two words: BAKE SALE! If we sell around 10 trillion brownies, we'll have that debt licked in no time! And we hear Ted Cruz makes a mean brownie.

Get Russia to invade us and watch the aid money roll in: The surest way to untold riches!

Ask every American to sell just one kidney: True patriots will sell both!

Have Nancy Pelosi skip Starbucks and make her own coffee at home for the next 31 trillion days: We assume she'll continue to live at least that long.

Take out a reverse mortgage on Alaska: Most countries do this sort of thing toward the end of their lives.

Make the FBI raise extra cash by delivering pizza on their way to raid Trump supporters: Those armored assault trucks are great at keeping pizza really hot.

Have Biden ask Hunter to ask his Chinese employers to forgive the debt: Pretty please?

Have Janet Yellen marry Tom Brady and then divorce him to take half his money: Come on Tom, take one for the team!

Print 31 trillion more dollars: Wait — isn't this what we're already doing?

Stop spending more money than we have: No wait, that would be crazy. Never mind.

If you know someone in Congress, be sure to share these genius tips with them! We've GOT this, folks!

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#1. To: Ada (#0)

Mortgage all public lands and public building, the skip out on the mortgage.

Darkwing  posted on  2022-10-06   10:21:33 ET  Reply   Trace   Private Reply  


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