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Title: 15 Other Things The Secret Service Found At The White House
Source: [None]
URL Source: https://babylonbee.com/news/15-othe ... rvice-found-at-the-white-house
Published: Jul 8, 2023
Author: BabylonBee.com
Post Date: 2023-07-08 09:31:50 by Ada
Keywords: None
Views: 119
Comments: 1

The nation was rocked to its core this week after a substance later determined to be cocaine was found in the West Wing of the White House. The always-trustworthy and not-in-any-way-corrupt D.C. Police Department immediately launched a very thorough 15-minute investigation to learn the identity of the culprit.

While it's unlikely we'll ever know who could have possibly brought cocaine into the house where President Biden and his crack-addicted son were staying, The Babylon Bee has obtained a list of 15 other things found at the White House during the search:

Three more illegitimate children of Hunter Biden

Dead hookers

Live hookers

$72 billion marked "For Zelenskyy"

Teddy Roosevelt's skateboard

Jill Biden's Fisher-Price pretend doctor's kit

Dominion voting machine programming manual

Scrapbook containing Hunter Biden's baby teeth...and his adult teeth.

Ray Epps

A notebook labeled "Chairman Xi's To-Do List"

30 suitcases left behind by Sam Brinton

List of unsecured locations of classified documents

Hunter's other laptop (where he keeps the REALLY bad stuff)

A closet full of adult diapers

Glass vial labeled "Next Pandemic — Save for 2024"

As you can see, the White House is thankfully now free of cocaine — or any other illegal activity. Thanks for getting that taken care of, D.C. Police!

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#1. To: Ada (#0)

$72 billion marked "For Zelenskyy"

One Million Dollars in 100s is a three foot cube. I wonder if that 72 billion was kept in the Lincoln bedroom? ;)

"When bad men combine, the good must associate; else they will fall, one by one." Edmund Burke

BTP Holdings  posted on  2023-07-08   12:50:15 ET  Reply   Trace   Private Reply  


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