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Religion See other Religion Articles Title: The 'Healer' who had sex with abused women It began with promises of counselling, meditation, numerology and crystals: a one-stop healing shop in the suburbs. Two women, both of whom had been sexually abused in the past, saw a brochure for a man who said he could improve their physical and emotional health and well-being. He was a healer, well known among the natural therapies community on Auckland's North Shore. They were referred to him by friends. And his brochure promised "we really do have something for everyone". What counsellor Geoffrey Mogridge also had for these women was sex. Both - one a married mother who had been raped, the other a 33-year-old who was sexually abused as a child - paid for sessions which began as advertised, then moved into massage and kissing. Over a period of months the women spent hundreds of dollars on what they, at the time, believed were "affairs" but now see as nothing more than an untrained therapist who told them that having sex with him would "help". Mr Mogridge has admitted having sexual relationships with the women in letters and an interview with the Herald on Sunday. He also confessed there was another woman who had paid for "healing" sessions in which "sexual experimentation" occurred. But he disputed the women's claim that there were sexual affairs with more clients. "I see myself as a normal human being," Mr Mogridge said last week. "I see myself as someone who has made some mistakes that I obviously regret. I see myself as someone who has allowed what I considered to be mutual attractions... which I acted on, and which I see have caused myself and a whole lot of people hurt and discomfort." Mr Mogridge said he felt "victimised" by the allegations. "Because at the time, what was happening was, there was a mutual consent thing going on. And if someone's upset with you, wouldn't you expect that they'd say something?" The door to the Hillcrest treatment rooms where Mr Mogridge lives and works are unremarkable bar a heavenly promise taped to the front door. "Please knock," a home-made sign says, "and let your dreams unfold". It was this sublime slogan that the first woman put her faith in three years ago, hoping to find emotional support for the trauma of a rape she had suffered overseas a decade earlier, and which she and her family had come to New Zealand to forget. "I was looking for help," says the woman. "I now realise how vulnerable I was at the time." She didn't enjoy her first healing session with Mr Mogridge but a friend said 'maybe he is confronting you with your feelings and it's not a good feeling'. So she went back. By session four he was kissing her. "I was willing to let it happen," she admits. "I always thought that I would never have a sexual relationship with another man after the rape and I enjoyed it." The "affair" which usually took place during therapy sessions she paid for, continued for two months before both agreed to end it. "Each time I was there and we had sex, there would be something with his work afterwards, a little session, so I paid him." The woman kept her secret for almost three years, only telling her husband about the sexual relationship with Mr Mogridge in March. The couple last week lodged a complaint with the Health and Disabilities Commissioner. The Herald on Sunday obtained letters written by Mr Mogridge in April and May, after the woman's husband - a top Auckland medical professional - confronted him about the sessions with his wife. In his letters, Mr Mogridge admitted the sexual relationship, expressed his remorse and gave details of further "sexual experimentation" - some of which involved two female clients. The words "mutual", "consenting" and "attraction" pepper the letters. But, to the women who trusted Mr Mogridge to heal the psychological scars of sexual abuse, those words don't mean much. "It was very hard for me to see that he used me. I came out from a rape, I was used and I thought I would never let that happen again. I was so stupid. It happened again, and I was not willing to see that," said the woman. For months after the relationship ended, the woman continued to attend group meditation evenings run by Mr Mogridge, a fact she admits some may find strange. But to her the two-month affair was a "finished thing" - until she learned of other clients who also had sex with Mr Mogridge. One woman confided to her that she had felt "uncomfortable" during a massage. "She came to me and said that she had treatment by him... and he was going too far. Touching her breast and going too far under her undies." When confronted with these allegations by the Herald on Sunday, Mr Mogridge said he had kept that woman fully clothed but that she had been embarrassed about wearing a G-string. "She didn't like what had happened, but that is one I would still dispute," he said. Mr Mogridge also talked of the second "affair". The second woman told the Herald on Sunday yesterday that she felt guilty for keeping quiet for so long and hoped that Mr Mogridge would never work as a healer again. Over their nine-month sexual relationship, she said she regularly paid for sessions where he would perform oral sex and tantric massage. She estimated she had given him about $800 and said she had gone to him for help over her history of sexual abuse, as well as a recent rape. She knew that having a relationship with Mr Mogridge "complicated the ethics of things", but said he knew she had been sexually abused and that when they discussed her dislike of touching he told her to "push through it". "This is the really pathetic part, that I have to be really embarrassed about - I didn't leave. If I'd listened to that little voice in my head I would have just walked out of there. I don't know, it was just a gut feeling. I was really unclear about where the line was, about what he was supposed to be doing. I felt really naive and stupid, and I feel really dumb for letting him do stuff to me." He told her the sex "was really good healing", she said. "I was so lonely and it had been such a long time since anyone had shown me any affection." Now, she says, she is appalled at what happened. "There's that line, there's an ethical line, you don't pass it. You don't have sex with a client, you just don't." Mr Mogridge said he believed it was unfair that he was not allowed to have affairs with clients. "Obviously you're looked at differently in this type of profession... it's like doctors and lawyers and clairvoyants, we're not allowed to indulge in affairs that people can have in offices as well. On the TV and everything, what's shown is everybody is doing all that stuff." He said that for the past 18 months he had been in a monogamous relationship and now realised the sexual affairs with clients had been "dangerous". Mr Mogridge wrote that the repercussions of these affairs no longer made them worthwhile, and asked for the opportunity to demonstrate that he could be professional. He said he had removed all mention of "massage" from his flyers and that his partner was now the only woman he touched. But last week, in a numerology session with a young female reporter which lasted more than two hours, Mr Mogridge offered to "crack" her back and began massaging her shoulders. He stopped when she said she felt uncomfortable. In his brochure, Mr Mogridge described himself as a "natural therapies practitioner specialising in readings, healing, counselling (both spiritual and personal)". He also offered meditation classes, house and office "clearing" and workshops. The brochure said Mr Mogridge had "certificates and diplomas in both teaching and healing" but he later admitted none of his certificates were from officially-recognised bodies -and his only formal qualification was in shiatsu massage. He had worked as an online numerologist for two and a half years and was regularly invited to events such as the Visionary Living Show and New Spirit Festival. It is understood Mr Mogridge is not a member of any of the affiliate groups covered by the New Zealand Charter of Health Practitioners - the national watchdog organisation for natural health practitioners. The women who spoke to the Herald on Sunday say anyone who is seeking treatment in alternative therapies should look for someone who is affiliated to a professional body. "I have very bad feelings that I haven't said something before now," the first woman said about discovering other women had the same experience. "I have learned now that the only person who can tell you if something is right or wrong is yourself."
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#1. To: Minerva (#0)
I'll have to try that line out next time. I'll let you know how it turns out.
give it a go, you never know if there will be a next time :)
hi minerva!! you made it over!!
Thanks telling me about this place. how are bookmarks added?
in firefox i use bookmarks => bookmark this page. i think it is favorits => add to favorites in IE. the other forum is dead and i am glad i came here. ponchy isn't allowed on this site however and they closed the ponchy pit. so i guess you won't get to meet him.
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