[Home]  [Headlines]  [Latest Articles]  [Latest Comments]  [Post]  [Sign-in]  [Mail]  [Setup]  [Help] 

Status: Not Logged In; Sign In

Amalek (Enemies of Israel) 100,000 Views on Bitchute

ICE agents pull screaming illegal immigrant influencer from car after resisting arrest

Aaron Lewis on Being Blacklisted & Why Record Labels Promote Terrible Music

Connecticut Democratic Party Holds Presser To Cry About Libs of TikTok

Trump wants concealed carry in DC.

Chinese 108m Steel Bridge Collapses in 3s, 16 Workers Fall 130m into Yellow River

COVID-19 mRNA-Induced TURBO CANCERS.

Think Tank Urges Dems To Drop These 45 Terms That Turn Off Normies

Man attempts to carjack a New Yorker

Test post re: IRS

How Managers Are Using AI To Hire And Fire People

Israel's Biggest US Donor Now Owns CBS

14 Million Illegals Entered US in 2023: The Cost to Our Nation

American Taxpayers to Cover $3.5 Billion Pentagon Bill for U.S. Munitions Used Defending Israel

The Great Jonny Quest Documentary

This story About IRS Abuse Did Not Post

CDC Data Exposes Surge in Deaths Among Children of Covid-Vaxxed Mothers

This Interview in Munich in 1992 with Gudrun Himmler. (Heinrich Himmler's daughter)

25 STRANGE Wild West Home Features You’ll Never See Again

Zionists DEMAND Megyn Kelly's Head!

Cash Jordan: Migrant Mob THREATENS Judge... ICE 'Instantly Deports' Courthouse of Illegals

Barricades placed outside Federal Building in Downtown L.A.

Hulk Hogan bombshell as cops investigate claim catastrophic medical error led to his death

Everything That's Wrong With The Leftist Media In One (Now Deleted) Post...

FBI Raids Warmonger John BoltonÂ’s Home and Office

BREAKING: John Bolton's home raided by federal agents

CDC Adviser Says Vote On RSV Antibody Was Based On Distorted Data

Dick Thinking for Dummies

Only 17% Of 25-34-Year-Old Americans Have Attained The 5 Major Milestones Of Adulthood

'WTF are you guys doing?' DOJ exposes 'black and white evidence' that Biden admin knew autopenned pardons were legally flawed
4play
See other 4play Articles

Title: Drunk Driving
Source: Zerohedge
URL Source: https://www.zerohedge.com/markets/t ... cohol-related-arrest-two-years
Published: Jun 13, 2024
Author: JUST THE FACTS [ZH poster]
Post Date: 2024-06-13 16:22:39 by Esso
Keywords: None
Views: 9571
Comments: 27

A police officer was staking out a particularly rowdy bar for possible drunk drivers. [Sounds like Spudz]

At closing time, he saw a fellow stumble out of the bar, trip on the curb and try his keys on five different cars before he found his. Then he sat in the front seat fumbling around with his keys for several minutes. Everyone left the bar and drove off. Finally, he started his engine and began to pull away. The police officer was waiting for him. He stopped the driver, read him his rights and administered a Breathalyzer test. The results showed a reading of 0.0. The puzzled officer demanded to know how that could be.

The driver replied, "Tonight, I'm the designated decoy."

"Son-of-a-bitch!!!" Said the police officer

Poster Comment:

That was the funniest thing I've seen all day.

Post Comment   Private Reply   Ignore Thread  

Top • Page Up • Full Thread • Page Down • Bottom/Latest

#1. To: Esso (#0)

“I am not one of those weak-spirited, sappy Americans who want to be liked by all the people around them. I don’t care if people hate my guts; I assume most of them do. The important question is whether they are in a position to do anything about it. My affections, being concentrated over a few people, are not spread all over Hell in a vile attempt to placate sulky, worthless shits.” - William S Burroughs

Dakmar  posted on  2024-06-13   17:58:01 ET  Reply   Trace   Private Reply  

#2. To: Esso (#0)

See, we just need slick white suites!

“I am not one of those weak-spirited, sappy Americans who want to be liked by all the people around them. I don’t care if people hate my guts; I assume most of them do. The important question is whether they are in a position to do anything about it. My affections, being concentrated over a few people, are not spread all over Hell in a vile attempt to placate sulky, worthless shits.” - William S Burroughs

Dakmar  posted on  2024-06-13   18:13:54 ET  Reply   Trace   Private Reply  

#3. To: Dakmar (#2)

“The most terrifying force of death comes from the hands of Men who wanted to be left Alone.
TRUE TERROR will arrive at these people’s door, and they will cry, scream, and beg for mercy…
but it will fall upon the deaf ears of the Men who just wanted to be left alone.”

Esso  posted on  2024-06-13   19:21:21 ET  Reply   Trace   Private Reply  

#4. To: Esso (#3)

“I am not one of those weak-spirited, sappy Americans who want to be liked by all the people around them. I don’t care if people hate my guts; I assume most of them do. The important question is whether they are in a position to do anything about it. My affections, being concentrated over a few people, are not spread all over Hell in a vile attempt to placate sulky, worthless shits.” - William S Burroughs

Dakmar  posted on  2024-06-13   20:03:39 ET  Reply   Trace   Private Reply  

#5. To: Dakmar (#4) (Edited)

(Edit) A lot of that was CGI/AI, but accurate, nonetheless.

I remember putting a guy's hand on his guts and screaming for a medic that wasn't there like the video CGI. The Doggie saying goodbye on the casket about kills me.

Ronald Reagan never looked at his watch during the Dignified Transfer.

“The most terrifying force of death comes from the hands of Men who wanted to be left Alone.
TRUE TERROR will arrive at these people’s door, and they will cry, scream, and beg for mercy…
but it will fall upon the deaf ears of the Men who just wanted to be left alone.”

Esso  posted on  2024-06-13   20:08:45 ET  Reply   Trace   Private Reply  

#6. To: Esso (#0)

Ive been 82 days sober today.

______________________________________

Suspect all media / resist bad propaganda/Learn NLP everyday everyway ;) If you don't control your mind someone else will.

titorite  posted on  2024-06-13   20:15:07 ET  Reply   Trace   Private Reply  

#7. To: titorite, 4um (#6)

Ive been 82 days sober today.

I'm proud of you. That's where our paths diverge. I've lost almost all of my friends over the clot-shots. The only trusted folks I have are my Godson, Sling Blade and his daughter and my neighbors across the street.

I've got nothing left to live for except Dr. Kimmy who will soon be dead thanks to Prez Pedo's shot mandates. I hope she doesn't die here.

Stay strong, brutha.

“The most terrifying force of death comes from the hands of Men who wanted to be left Alone.
TRUE TERROR will arrive at these people’s door, and they will cry, scream, and beg for mercy…
but it will fall upon the deaf ears of the Men who just wanted to be left alone.”

Esso  posted on  2024-06-13   20:34:47 ET  Reply   Trace   Private Reply  

#8. To: titorite (#6)

Ive been 82 days sober today.

10 minutes for me! Want to rape Hillary?

“I am not one of those weak-spirited, sappy Americans who want to be liked by all the people around them. I don’t care if people hate my guts; I assume most of them do. The important question is whether they are in a position to do anything about it. My affections, being concentrated over a few people, are not spread all over Hell in a vile attempt to placate sulky, worthless shits.” - William S Burroughs

Dakmar  posted on  2024-06-13   20:44:59 ET  Reply   Trace   Private Reply  

#9. To: Dakmar (#8) (Edited)

10 minutes for me!

Zero minutes for me. I racked up a bunch of points on ZH today.

Want to rape Hillary?

Negative, Juliet Bravo, NEGATIVE! PULL OUT! EJECT, EJECT, EJECT!

“The most terrifying force of death comes from the hands of Men who wanted to be left Alone.
TRUE TERROR will arrive at these people’s door, and they will cry, scream, and beg for mercy…
but it will fall upon the deaf ears of the Men who just wanted to be left alone.”

Esso  posted on  2024-06-13   20:50:17 ET  Reply   Trace   Private Reply  

#10. To: Esso (#5)

I remember putting a guy's hand on his guts and screaming for a medic that wasn't there like the video CGI. The Doggie saying goodbye on the casket about kills me.

Ronald Reagan never looked at his watch during the Dignified Transfer.

>Patton’s “Blood and Guts” Speech">

But Patton was never a fucking sunbeam like me, right?

“I am not one of those weak-spirited, sappy Americans who want to be liked by all the people around them. I don’t care if people hate my guts; I assume most of them do. The important question is whether they are in a position to do anything about it. My affections, being concentrated over a few people, are not spread all over Hell in a vile attempt to placate sulky, worthless shits.” - William S Burroughs

Dakmar  posted on  2024-06-13   20:51:38 ET  Reply   Trace   Private Reply  

#11. To: Dakmar (#10)

Patton was a little before my time, but you'll always be my little fucking sunbeam, Dak.

“The most terrifying force of death comes from the hands of Men who wanted to be left Alone.
TRUE TERROR will arrive at these people’s door, and they will cry, scream, and beg for mercy…
but it will fall upon the deaf ears of the Men who just wanted to be left alone.”

Esso  posted on  2024-06-13   20:56:00 ET  Reply   Trace   Private Reply  

#12. To: Esso (#9)

Negative, Juliet Bravo

Fuck You! I'm sure Jesus is screeching at me through finger painting on Graham Crackers! I think Wendy's has the correct game pieces. Wendy doesn't want me for a sunbeam....

“I am not one of those weak-spirited, sappy Americans who want to be liked by all the people around them. I don’t care if people hate my guts; I assume most of them do. The important question is whether they are in a position to do anything about it. My affections, being concentrated over a few people, are not spread all over Hell in a vile attempt to placate sulky, worthless shits.” - William S Burroughs

Dakmar  posted on  2024-06-13   20:56:35 ET  Reply   Trace   Private Reply  

#13. To: Esso (#11)

“I am not one of those weak-spirited, sappy Americans who want to be liked by all the people around them. I don’t care if people hate my guts; I assume most of them do. The important question is whether they are in a position to do anything about it. My affections, being concentrated over a few people, are not spread all over Hell in a vile attempt to placate sulky, worthless shits.” - William S Burroughs

Dakmar  posted on  2024-06-13   21:00:42 ET  Reply   Trace   Private Reply  

#14. To: Dakmar (#13)

Next time I send you a package, I promise it won't be CIA "Deer Guns", I promise.

How much crack can you march out? The Covi shots have really fucked up my dealer network.

Can semis navigate in your hood?

“The most terrifying force of death comes from the hands of Men who wanted to be left Alone.
TRUE TERROR will arrive at these people’s door, and they will cry, scream, and beg for mercy…
but it will fall upon the deaf ears of the Men who just wanted to be left alone.”

Esso  posted on  2024-06-13   21:16:05 ET  Reply   Trace   Private Reply  

#15. To: Esso (#14)

Next time I send you a package, I promise it won't be CIA "Deer Guns", I promise.

How much crack can you march out? The Covi shots have really fucked up my dealer network.

Can semis navigate in your hood?

“I am not one of those weak-spirited, sappy Americans who want to be liked by all the people around them. I don’t care if people hate my guts; I assume most of them do. The important question is whether they are in a position to do anything about it. My affections, being concentrated over a few people, are not spread all over Hell in a vile attempt to placate sulky, worthless shits.” - William S Burroughs

Dakmar  posted on  2024-06-13   21:21:34 ET  Reply   Trace   Private Reply  

#16. To: Esso (#14)

Grateful Dead - Monkey And The Engineer - 10/31/1980 - Radio City Music Hall

“I am not one of those weak-spirited, sappy Americans who want to be liked by all the people around them. I don’t care if people hate my guts; I assume most of them do. The important question is whether they are in a position to do anything about it. My affections, being concentrated over a few people, are not spread all over Hell in a vile attempt to placate sulky, worthless shits.” - William S Burroughs

Dakmar  posted on  2024-06-13   21:25:16 ET  Reply   Trace   Private Reply  

#17. To: Esso (#14)

I don't give a shit how precise music sounds, I have to do the math myself.

“I am not one of those weak-spirited, sappy Americans who want to be liked by all the people around them. I don’t care if people hate my guts; I assume most of them do. The important question is whether they are in a position to do anything about it. My affections, being concentrated over a few people, are not spread all over Hell in a vile attempt to placate sulky, worthless shits.” - William S Burroughs

Dakmar  posted on  2024-06-13   21:31:17 ET  Reply   Trace   Private Reply  

#18. To: Esso (#16)

A song about tragedy narrowly averted, lol

“I am not one of those weak-spirited, sappy Americans who want to be liked by all the people around them. I don’t care if people hate my guts; I assume most of them do. The important question is whether they are in a position to do anything about it. My affections, being concentrated over a few people, are not spread all over Hell in a vile attempt to placate sulky, worthless shits.” - William S Burroughs

Dakmar  posted on  2024-06-13   22:08:24 ET  Reply   Trace   Private Reply  

#19. To: Dakmar (#18)

I had a dream about a gal the other night. She was an old gal, I haven't seen Jan H****** from 20 or 30 years ago.

“The most terrifying force of death comes from the hands of Men who wanted to be left Alone.
TRUE TERROR will arrive at these people’s door, and they will cry, scream, and beg for mercy…
but it will fall upon the deaf ears of the Men who just wanted to be left alone.”

Esso  posted on  2024-06-13   22:13:00 ET  Reply   Trace   Private Reply  

#20. To: Esso (#19)

Most of the dreams I remember involve either family or former co-workers being mean to to me for no reason, until I just go mean right back. Shit, most of these tormentors are fucking dead, I have no idea why they worry me.

“I am not one of those weak-spirited, sappy Americans who want to be liked by all the people around them. I don’t care if people hate my guts; I assume most of them do. The important question is whether they are in a position to do anything about it. My affections, being concentrated over a few people, are not spread all over Hell in a vile attempt to placate sulky, worthless shits.” - William S Burroughs

Dakmar  posted on  2024-06-13   22:21:28 ET  Reply   Trace   Private Reply  

#21. To: Esso (#19)

I had a dream about a gal the other night. She was an old gal, I haven't seen Jan H****** from 20 or 30 years ago.

Sort of same deal, I had dream about girl that delivered newspapers, she was so adorable but obviously thought I was psychotic, lol.

“I am not one of those weak-spirited, sappy Americans who want to be liked by all the people around them. I don’t care if people hate my guts; I assume most of them do. The important question is whether they are in a position to do anything about it. My affections, being concentrated over a few people, are not spread all over Hell in a vile attempt to placate sulky, worthless shits.” - William S Burroughs

Dakmar  posted on  2024-06-13   22:24:30 ET  Reply   Trace   Private Reply  

#22. To: Dakmar (#21) (Edited)

I kinda made out with Jan, If Pam would've known about that, I'd be dead.

Jan was a gal on one of our assignments. I was doing some freelance work.

“The most terrifying force of death comes from the hands of Men who wanted to be left Alone.
TRUE TERROR will arrive at these people’s door, and they will cry, scream, and beg for mercy…
but it will fall upon the deaf ears of the Men who just wanted to be left alone.”

Esso  posted on  2024-06-13   22:29:03 ET  Reply   Trace   Private Reply  

#23. To: Dakmar (#21)

I wish Doc was old enough to retire, but she probably never will, like Fauxi.

She probably won't live long enough to make 63 which will be 70 by then.

“The most terrifying force of death comes from the hands of Men who wanted to be left Alone.
TRUE TERROR will arrive at these people’s door, and they will cry, scream, and beg for mercy…
but it will fall upon the deaf ears of the Men who just wanted to be left alone.”

Esso  posted on  2024-06-13   22:35:09 ET  Reply   Trace   Private Reply  

#24. To: Dakmar (#8)

Ive been 82 days sober today.

10 minutes for me! Want to rape Hillary?

90 days now, and no, dear god no. Esso wait for me, im bailing too.

______________________________________

Suspect all media / resist bad propaganda/Learn NLP everyday everyway ;) If you don't control your mind someone else will.

titorite  posted on  2024-06-21   17:17:21 ET  Reply   Trace   Private Reply  

#25. To: titorite, Esso (#24)

you can leave me out :)

“I am not one of those weak-spirited, sappy Americans who want to be liked by all the people around them. I don’t care if people hate my guts; I assume most of them do. The important question is whether they are in a position to do anything about it. My affections, being concentrated over a few people, are not spread all over Hell in a vile attempt to placate sulky, worthless shits.” - William S Burroughs

Dakmar  posted on  2024-06-21   19:38:09 ET  Reply   Trace   Private Reply  

#26. To: Dakmar (#25)

you can leave me out

Are you locked in your bathroom again?

“The most terrifying force of death comes from the hands of Men who wanted to be left Alone.
TRUE TERROR will arrive at these people’s door, and they will cry, scream, and beg for mercy…
but it will fall upon the deaf ears of the Men who just wanted to be left alone.”

Esso  posted on  2024-06-21   20:31:26 ET  Reply   Trace   Private Reply  

#27. To: Esso (#26)

Are you locked in your bathroom again?

Not since 2019! I tied the keys to my cat!

“I am not one of those weak-spirited, sappy Americans who want to be liked by all the people around them. I don’t care if people hate my guts; I assume most of them do. The important question is whether they are in a position to do anything about it. My affections, being concentrated over a few people, are not spread all over Hell in a vile attempt to placate sulky, worthless shits.” - William S Burroughs

Dakmar  posted on  2024-06-21   20:48:32 ET  Reply   Trace   Private Reply  

Top • Page Up • Full Thread • Page Down • Bottom/Latest

[Home]  [Headlines]  [Latest Articles]  [Latest Comments]  [Post]  [Sign-in]  [Mail]  [Setup]  [Help]