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Religion
See other Religion Articles

Title: Statement by Abu Musab Zarqawi From Islamic Heaven
Source: JOHN W LILLPOP
URL Source: [None]
Published: Jun 10, 2006
Author: JOHN W LILLPOP
Post Date: 2006-06-10 18:21:48 by alwaysontheright
Keywords: None
Views: 639
Comments: 28

FOR IMMEDIATE RELEASE

Statement by Abu Musab Zarqawi From Islamic Heaven

(Islamic Heaven---Al -Jazeer, CNN, MSNBC)

Brothers and Heirs to the Throne of Heaven,

Praise be to Allah!

After my arrival here two days ago, I kissed the clouds and thanked Allah for deliverance from the infidel devils lead by that bow-legged, dyslexic Christian cowboy from Texas, GW Bush.

I prayed that, God willing, Bush would be forced to spend eternity with Nancy Pelosi in San Francisco, a situation otherwise known as hell.... even without satan or the furnaces.

Praise be to Allah!

We know that our true God would never punish even the most notorious infidel so brutally. So I faced west and, Allah forgive me, prayed to the infidel's god.

God willing, Bush and Ms. Pelosi will be manacled together in San Francisco's Castro District forever. Bush will suffer greatly, God willing, at the hands of tens of thousands of young men that would have been unable to marry under his failed marriage amendment.

Praise be to Allah!

Brothers, all is good in Islamic Heaven, save one detail.

Each and every one of the 72 virgins that greeted me is the spitting image of Helen Thomas, a fiction writer who works in Washington DC, capitol city of the infidels.

Pray for me, brothers: These women are virgins, but not by choice!

This is NOT what I was expecting as my reward for being blown to smithereens.

Praise be to Allah!

God willing, your prayers will deliver unto me 72 middle-eastern Muslim women, ages 15- 21, lean but not mean, beautiful and still virgins by choice.

Allah speed brothers! Without seductive virgins in my midst, this gig sucks!

Praise be to Allah!

Your Comrade in Death,

Musab Zarqawi, Deceased

http://citizenconservative.com/more.php?id=166_0_1_0_M (1 image)

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#1. To: alwaysontheright (#0)

try writing something that isn't childish and shrill for a change.

Morgana le Fay  posted on  2006-06-10   18:23:11 ET  Reply   Trace   Private Reply  


#2. To: alwaysontheright (#0)

What posessed you to post this, pagan? Has your father, the morning star, been beating you upside the head with a rolled up newspaper again?

Quit bogarting that peace, Herbert!

Dakmar  posted on  2006-06-10   18:23:53 ET  Reply   Trace   Private Reply  


#3. To: All (#0)

Damn, AOTR, that is FUNNY!

alwaysontheright  posted on  2006-06-10   18:24:12 ET  Reply   Trace   Private Reply  


#4. To: Morgana le Fay (#1)

Here is my AOTR impression:

Nyaa nyaaa Bush and the GOP are God but I can't explain why. Hannity didn't insert that piece of info into my brain.

All Democrats worship satan but Rush hasn't slipped me the link to prove this up yet.

Nyaa, nyaaa, nyaa. Arn't I a sophisticated commentator? I wonder why everyone laughs at me?

.

...  posted on  2006-06-10   18:26:21 ET  Reply   Trace   Private Reply  


#5. To: alwaysontheright (#3)

Damn, AOTR, that is FUNNY!

If you hadn't have said this, no one else would have.

Everyone else thinks it is idiotic and shrill.

But you know that or you wouldn't have jumped in to blow your own pathetic horn.

.

...  posted on  2006-06-10   18:27:43 ET  Reply   Trace   Private Reply  


#6. To: alwaysontheright (#0)

That's fine, but why did you kill those little trick-or-treaters?

Quit bogarting that peace, Herbert!

Dakmar  posted on  2006-06-10   18:30:41 ET  Reply   Trace   Private Reply  


#7. To: alwaysontheright (#3)

Thank you for posting this. One poor uneducated raghead down 16 million more to go. (not counting Iran)

What is it we call them musie's, moose's, I can't recall. I hope our boys have enough 500 pound stand-off weapons to finish the job. At this rate we could see the troops home by the new millenium.

I'm not ready to make nice

Hmmmmm  posted on  2006-06-10   18:50:56 ET  Reply   Trace   Private Reply  


#8. To: ... (#4)

I'm in awe of his masterbating skills. (I hope I spelled that right)

I'm not ready to make nice

Hmmmmm  posted on  2006-06-10   18:55:30 ET  Reply   Trace   Private Reply  


#9. To: ... (#5)

Damn, AOTR, that is FUNNY! If you hadn't have said this, no one else would have.

Everyone else thinks it is idiotic and shrill.

But you know that or you wouldn't have jumped in to blow your own pathetic horn.

A true humorist realizes perfection is beyong man.

AOTR's juvenile brand of humor is oafish disruption, designed to get even with folks who can think and know right from wrong. I bet he's a big fan of Pig-boy Rush Limbaugh.

Life is a tragedy to those who feel, and a comedy to those who think.

Zoroaster  posted on  2006-06-10   19:36:42 ET  Reply   Trace   Private Reply  


#10. To: Zoroaster (#9)

I think he's ALS and likes to suck the cock.

Quit bogarting that peace, Herbert!

Dakmar  posted on  2006-06-10   19:37:55 ET  Reply   Trace   Private Reply  


#11. To: Hmmmmm (#8)

Forgetting how to spell it is far less important than forgetting how to do it.

Jethro Tull  posted on  2006-06-10   19:47:45 ET  Reply   Trace   Private Reply  


#12. To: Zoroaster (#9)

Everyone else thinks it is idiotic and shrill.

That is what makes it so DAMN funny! Idiots like you take it seriously and leave those of us who are level-headed rolling with laughter at your stupid replies!

LOL!

alwaysontheright  posted on  2006-06-10   19:49:06 ET  Reply   Trace   Private Reply  


#13. To: Jethro Tull (#11)

Forgetting how to spell it is far less important than forgetting how to do it.

Forgetting how to do it? LOL

Reminds me of one of Clinton's surgeon general folks. Jocquelen Elder---remember he rants and raves about the health benefits of self-gratification? LOL

This little old black lady telling all those lily-white Christian boys to 'get it on' with theyselves! God, was that funny!

alwaysontheright  posted on  2006-06-10   19:53:01 ET  Reply   Trace   Private Reply  


#14. To: Hmmmmm (#7)

16 million more to go.

And don't forget the three suicides at Gitmo! They also count as notches on GW's holster!

alwaysontheright  posted on  2006-06-10   19:54:44 ET  Reply   Trace   Private Reply  


#15. To: Dakmar (#10)

He's like ALS in that he's sort of fact challenged and can't debate or defend his ideas. And because of this, like ALS, he devotes a lot of time to simply disrupting discussion he disagrees with.

I also notice that he posts a picture whenever things get hot for him - like ALS did when he was fishing for IPs on LP.

But I don't think he is ALS. Neither ALS or AOTR are bright enough to put on a really covert front. I think if it were ALS, you would hear ALS speak from him all the time. I don't hear this.

I hear someone with the same problems as ALS, i.e, a person with passionately held opinions on a subject, but no real understanding of the subject - and no people skills to help him get his ideas across.

.

...  posted on  2006-06-10   20:02:16 ET  Reply   Trace   Private Reply  


#16. To: alwaysontheright, ALL (#13)

CLICK IT, THEN STROKE IT. THANK YOU.

Jethro Tull  posted on  2006-06-10   20:04:18 ET  (1 image) Reply   Trace   Private Reply  


#17. To: alwaysontheright (#12)

Your lack of humanity is exceeded only by your stupid arrogance. You're an object of horror, really, a human form with reason fled, while wretched life remains.

Life is a tragedy to those who feel, and a comedy to those who think.

Zoroaster  posted on  2006-06-10   20:05:41 ET  Reply   Trace   Private Reply  


#18. To: alwaysontheright (#12)

Idiots like you take it seriously and leave those of us who are level-headed rolling with laughter at your stupid replies!

I've watched you on several foruns. In each case people simply ridicule you. I've never seen a single person take you seriously or do anything except roll their eyes and laugh at you. And here you are calling another person an Idiot. Are you some type of sociopath who is incapable of seeing himself? I've met a lot of jewish guys who are exactly that. Is this the case with you?

.

...  posted on  2006-06-10   20:06:01 ET  Reply   Trace   Private Reply  


#19. To: alwaysontheright (#13)

Reminds me of one of Clinton's surgeon general folks. Jocquelen Elder---remember he rants and raves about the health benefits of self-gratification? LOL

Does this drive your flair for mental masturbation on this forum?

.

...  posted on  2006-06-10   20:07:24 ET  Reply   Trace   Private Reply  


#20. To: Zoroaster (#17)

Your lack of humanity is exceeded only by your stupid arrogance.

You are just a goy. He has you placed in the social order.

.

...  posted on  2006-06-10   20:09:27 ET  Reply   Trace   Private Reply  


#21. To: ... (#20)

You are just a goy. He has you placed in the social order.

You're probably right.

Carl Jung once remarked to Freud that the Jewish mind tends to obsess over scatology, phallic images, and incest; his twisted pervversion fits the pattern.

Life is a tragedy to those who feel, and a comedy to those who think.

Zoroaster  posted on  2006-06-10   20:23:57 ET  Reply   Trace   Private Reply  


#22. To: ... (#20)

You are just a goy.

So am I.

Quit bogarting that peace, Herbert!

Dakmar  posted on  2006-06-10   20:30:29 ET  Reply   Trace   Private Reply  


#23. To: Jethro Tull (#16)

neocon creeps like her are my enemy, can I hold a dollar?

Quit bogarting that peace, Herbert!

Dakmar  posted on  2006-06-10   20:35:37 ET  (1 image) Reply   Trace   Private Reply  


#24. To: Dakmar (#23)

Did you click her on in #16? She talks. A dollar? You want to hold a dollar?

Jethro Tull  posted on  2006-06-10   20:39:17 ET  Reply   Trace   Private Reply  


#25. To: Jethro Tull (#16)

I think I'm in love, man!!! [typed while spewing Dr Pepper all over my keyboard] LOL.


Law Enforcement Against Prohibition

"I tell you, freedom and human rights in America are doomed. The U.S. government will lead the American people in -- and the West in general -- into an unbearable hell and a choking life."
--Osama bin Laden

IndieTX  posted on  2006-06-10   23:48:57 ET  (1 image) Reply   Trace   Private Reply  


#26. To: Zoroaster (#17)

Your lack of humanity is exceeded only by your stupid arrogance

Does that mean you disapprove of the post? Or is there a point to your post????

alwaysontheright  posted on  2006-06-11   2:06:56 ET  Reply   Trace   Private Reply  


#27. To: Jethro Tull (#16)

THEN STROKE IT.

That was her counsel! What a hero to eye doctors all over the world.

LOL Thanks JT!

alwaysontheright  posted on  2006-06-11   2:08:54 ET  Reply   Trace   Private Reply  


#28. To: alwaysontheright (#26)

Your lack of humanity is exceeded only by your stupid arrogance

Does that mean you disapprove of the post? Or is there a point to your post????

ROTFLOL!!

Why don't you think it over for a minute moron. I'm sure the answer will come to you. Everyone else understands what he said - you probably just need twice the time as a normal person.

.

...  posted on  2006-06-11   2:48:27 ET  Reply   Trace   Private Reply  


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