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Title: Women In The Future May Produce Sperm
Source:
www.americanchronicle.com
URL Source: http://www.americanchronicle.com/ar ... iewArticle.asp?articleID=11394
Published: Jul 11, 2006
Author: Robert Paul Reyes
Post Date: 2006-07-11 20:10:23 by Mind_Virus
Keywords: None
Views: 278
Comments: 15
Women In The Future May Produce Sperm Robert Paul Reyes July 11, 2006 Some extreme elements of the women's movement argue that men are superfluous. Men always smugly answered, "Right, and who's going to mow your lawn, check your oil, and not to mention impregnate you?" A new scientific breakthrough may indeed make guys as obsolete as a Betamax, females in the future may be able to produce sperm. Evil scientists in England have turned stem cells from an embryo into sperm which are capable of producing offspring. The satanic experiment used embryo cells to produce seven baby mice, six of whom lived into adulthood, although the survivors suffered adverse events. Contrary to popular belief, this feat has never been accomplished by Bulgarian women weightlifters. The only good news for men is that this advance can help men with certain types of infertility to become fertile . This revolting development has me feeling more like a mouse than a man, if my girlfriend figures out how to program the DVR, I will become totally irrelevant. Not even a mega-dose of Viagra can restore my confidence and vigor, it looks like the male appendage will soon be totally useless. Men in the future may become nothing more than a sex toy that doesn't require a battery.
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#1. To: Mind_Virus (#0)
Without men, civilization would last until the oil needed changing.
"Benjamin Franklin was shown the new American constitution, and he said, 'I don't like it, but I will vote for it because we need something right now. But this constitution in time will fail, as all such efforts do. And it will fail because of the corruption of the people, in a general sense.' And that is what it has come to now, exactly as Franklin predicted." -- Gore Vidal
Or until something heavy needed to be lifted, or a jar of something needed to be opened. Don't even get me started on spiders, snakes, and icky things. I'm telling you, a world without men for a lot of women would be a scary, and lonely place.
#2. To: YertleTurtle (#1)
 | What's that Mr. Nipples? You want me to ask the nice lady about her rack?. |
#3. To: TommyTheMadArtist (#2)
You damned right, TTMA......just as God didn't make Adam and Andy, he didn't make Eve and Evelyn to be soulmates either. What a sick, sick world. Just envision a world where there is nothing by dikes and dike lovers.....and they want so badly to have a 'family'.......they produce these mice and when they aren't perfect, they merely kill them and 'move on'....maybe using the carcasses for medical experiments to move up the food chain to something a bit more reliable than mice offspring!
I'm telling you, a world without men for a lot of women would be a scary, and lonely place.
#4. To: rowdee (#3)
I almost welcome the future. Here's why. When I was a kid growing up, I was shy, awkward, and of course, a nerd. Even after puberty hit, I was still a dork. It wasn't until I was in my late 20's to early 30's that I became cool, and good looking. With that said... I could be cloned in the future by the disgruntled straight underground of women, and passed around like the village bicycle. I'm telling you, the future is looking brighter for one of my clones.
| What's that Mr. Nipples? You want me to ask the nice lady about her rack?. |
#5. To: Mind_Virus (#0)
OK, but who has to pay the 'child support' payments to the State?
'Whatsoever a man soweth, that shall he also reap.'
#6. To: Mind_Virus (#0)
Not even a mega-dose of Viagra can restore my confidence and vigor, it looks like the male appendage will soon be totally useless. Men in the future may become nothing more than a sex toy that doesn't require a battery. Oh, really? Let them make their own pearl necklace then. :p
Women In The Future May Produce Sperm
"To be nobody-but-yourself - in a world which is doing its best, night and day, to make you everybody else - means to fight the hardest battle which any human being can ever fight; and never stop fighting." E.E. Cummings
#7. To: TommyTheMadArtist (#2)
I'm telling you, a world without men for a lot of women would be a scary, and lonely place. I second that, Tommy. My boyfriend is He-Whom-Spiders-Fear. Whenever I see one I usually start squealing before I throw the nearest book or pan at the wall. It's amazing how high I can jump in the presence of large insects.
Or until something heavy needed to be lifted, or a jar of something needed to be opened. Don't even get me started on spiders, snakes, and icky things.
"I woke up in the CRAZY HOUSE."
#8. To: YertleTurtle (#1)
A world without men; not good. I've worked in an all female office before and I'd hate to have a world full of women leaders with their fingers on the big red button. "Flat chested am I!? Well Mrs. Prime Minister, lets see how those fake implants of yours look after I make them glow in the dark!" Yes, give the nuclear launch codes to the person that has massive mood swings every 4 weeks.
"The more I see of life, the less I fear death" - Me.
#9. To: rowdee (#3)
Mmmmm....sexy.
Just envision a world where there is nothing by dikes and dike lovers.....
"There is no poo here," Sofika said. "There is no smell."
#10. To: mehitable (#7)
My girlfriend puts glasses upside down on spiders and doesn't take them off for a week. Cicadas? She pulls a hood over her head and waves a flyswatter in front of her face while running to the house while screaming in her cellphone which is attached to my ear. "Of God! There's one!! There's another!!!"
My boyfriend is He-Whom-Spiders-Fear. Whenever I see one I usually start squealing before I throw the nearest book or pan at the wall. It's amazing how high I can jump in the presence of large insects.
"Benjamin Franklin was shown the new American constitution, and he said, 'I don't like it, but I will vote for it because we need something right now. But this constitution in time will fail, as all such efforts do. And it will fail because of the corruption of the people, in a general sense.' And that is what it has come to now, exactly as Franklin predicted." -- Gore Vidal
#11. To: YertleTurtle (#10)
Does that work? I may try that when he's not around. I tell ya - spiders absolutely terrify me. Other bugs are creepy or gross, but there's just something horrible about spiders.
My girlfriend puts glasses upside down on spiders and doesn't take them off for a week.
"I woke up in the CRAZY HOUSE."
#12. To: mehitable (#11)
Yes, it works. All that's left is a shriveled-up dead spider. If I was cruel and sadistic I'll tell you to go to Google Images and type in "Brown Recluse" because pictures of some of the wounds would come up. Since I'm not cruel and sadistic I won't do that.
Does that work? I may try that when he's not around.
"Benjamin Franklin was shown the new American constitution, and he said, 'I don't like it, but I will vote for it because we need something right now. But this constitution in time will fail, as all such efforts do. And it will fail because of the corruption of the people, in a general sense.' And that is what it has come to now, exactly as Franklin predicted." -- Gore Vidal
#13. To: YertleTurtle (#12)
I've already seen those, Turtle...it's part of my nightmare. I had a boss whose wife nearly lost an arm to one of those bites. Yech.
"I woke up in the CRAZY HOUSE."
#14. To: YertleTurtle (#12)
actually...i don't think I could do that. I'd hate the little thing to starve to death even though I hate them. They can't help that. I'd rather see it killed quickly than suffer.
Yes, it works. All that's left is a shriveled-up dead spider.
"I woke up in the CRAZY HOUSE."
#15. To: mehitable (#14)
Spray it with bugkiller and then suck it up in the vacuum. Do I have to do EVERYTHING for you?!?!?!?
I'd rather see it killed quickly than suffer.
"Benjamin Franklin was shown the new American constitution, and he said, 'I don't like it, but I will vote for it because we need something right now. But this constitution in time will fail, as all such efforts do. And it will fail because of the corruption of the people, in a general sense.' And that is what it has come to now, exactly as Franklin predicted." -- Gore Vidal
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