See other Religion Articles
Title: QUIZ: Should you worship God at the Kingdom Hall with Jehovah's Witnesses?
Source:
The Bentinel
URL Source: http://www.thebentinel.com/jw-quiz.php
Published: Apr 5, 2005
Author: unlisted
Post Date: 2005-04-05 08:24:40 by 2Trievers
Keywords: Witnesses?, Jehovahs, worship
Views: 274
Comments: 41
Post Comment Private Reply Ignore Thread
Top • Page Up • Full Thread • Page Down • Bottom/Latest
#1. To: 2Trievers (#0)
So...
You have some serious changes to make before you can be baptized as a Jehovah's Witness. Your attitude will likely get you labeled as a rebel. Parents will not encourage their children to hang around you or your children, unless there is reason to believe they can help you become a better Jehovah's Witness. It is unlikely that you will ever really fit in at the Kingdom Hall. LOL, I'm surprised I got a score that high. Probably that business about not giving a crap what others think of me.
20%!! I was hoping for something lower. The JH church is very nearly a cult. Definitely suited to weak minded followers.
You have what Jehovah's Witnesses call a "rebellious spirit" and a "bad attitude". Even if you became a Witness, you would be a bad one. You'd probably talk to disfellowshipped people instead of shunning them like you're supposed to. You wouldn't blindly agree to every new teaching of the Watchtower. The only friends you would have at the Kingdom Hall would be the teenagers that think you're cool, and the other "rebels". The Kingdom Hall is not in the cards for you. Oh *DARN* ME? A "rebellious spirit" and a "bad attitude" ??? Maybe there is some truth to this quiz after all .... :)
Ouch!
No, not by choice.
my score.
lol. i like that "bad attitude."
i shoulda scored like mirage did. i don't know where i effed up on that quiz. :P
I have the highest score so far....and I'm an atheist. :)
You are 17% Jehovah's Witness! You have what Jehovah's Witnesses call a "rebellious spirit" and a "bad attitude". Even if you became a Witness, you would be a bad one. You'd probably talk to disfellowshipped people instead of shunning them like you're supposed to. You wouldn't blindly agree to every new teaching of the Watchtower. The only friends you would have at the Kingdom Hall would be the teenagers that think you're cool, and the other "rebels". The Kingdom Hall is not in the cards for you.
Well, I would talk to disfellowshipped people. I'm willing to bet they're more fun :P
*ahem* I am a "Cafeteria Catholic" and should have scored higher. Bad attitude indeed.
I saw that word and immediately thought of Lorena Bobbitt.
"Compound in Guyana" wasn't a choice so I stopped taking the quiz.
Several of the questions didn't have answers I thought appropriate. When selecting religious leaders I always try to find the one with the coolest car. There's nothing quite so special as trawling for tramps with someone well versed in mind control.
You'll make a great Catholic. BTW Now is the time to get in, they're looking for a new boss and everybody is moving up fast.
You think they'd mind my incredibly foul language?
Hell no. Just buy an Indulgence. They're *buy one get one free* this week.
laughing...
i wonder if it's possible to score less than 17% baaaaad attitude on it.
I messed up when I said I keep my lawn mowed. Who knew?
You are 30% Jehovah's Witness! You have some serious changes to make before you can be baptized as a Jehovah's Witness. Your attitude will likely get you labeled as a rebel. Parents will not encourage their children to hang around you or your children, unless there is reason to believe they can help you become a better Jehovah's Witness. It is unlikely that you will ever really fit in at the Kingdom Hall.
You are 10% Jehovah's Witness! You have what Jehovah's Witnesses call a "rebellious spirit" and a "bad attitude". Even if you became a Witness, you would be a bad one. You'd probably talk to disfellowshipped people instead of shunning them like you're supposed to. You wouldn't blindly agree to every new teaching of the Watchtower. The only friends you would have at the Kingdom Hall would be the teenagers that think you're cool, and the other "rebels". The Kingdom Hall is not in the cards for you. LOL!
Breaking ... George W. Bush Bought Popemobile on eBay WASHINGTON - The White House revealed this morning that President George W. Bush had purchased the Popemobile during a late night Web browsing session with his twin daughters, Jenna and Barbara, the weekend before Pope John Paul II died. According to the White House statement, the president was intrigued with the following item: “Late model, mother-of-pearl M-430 Mercedes-Benz. Automatic, AC, PW, PS, PB, power bed pan, tinted windows, 10-disc CD player, and bullet-proof solarium. Low mileage, garaged, owned by elderly gentleman who only used it to go to church on Sunday.” “Dad was looking for something to surprise Mom with when she got back from her fruitcake mission to Afghanistan,” said daughter Jenna, the blond, bouncy one who wants to be a school teacher. “We didn’t know it was the Popemobile, though, until we e-mailed the seller to ask what a solarium was.” After receiving an automated reply in sixteen languages from jp2@thevatican.it, Bush phoned Secretary of State Condoleezza Rice, who had just emerged from her nightly session in her hyperbaric chamber. “Connie told Dad, ‘It’s the pope, you moron,’” said daughter Barbara, the dark-haired one who wants to be Rosalynn Carter. “There was only half an hour left until the auction closed,” said Jenna, “so we knew there wasn’t enough time to teach Dad how the bidding worked. We just mashed the ‘Buy Now’ button, and as Dad would say, mission accomplished.” Sources close to eBay revealed that high bidders at the time the president made his winning bid were swiftjfk@heinz57.com, kidsrideforfree@neverland.org, and dick@secretbunker.gov. An official from the White House motor pool said he expects the Popemobile to arrive at Andrews Air Force Base on Tuesday. Former Secretary of State Colin Powell, who is now an in-demand political consultant, will be there to greet the vehicle. After Powell has washed and waxed the Popemobile, he will drive it to the White House. “Dad can’t wait to see the car,” said Barbara. “I bet he keeps it for himself. He told us he was going to change its name to the Bushmobile because that’s what he called his first car in high school.” In related news, the Vatican has announced that Time-Warner Records would release the Most Beloved Encyclicals of John Paul II, read by Mel Gibson with musical arrangements by Zamfir.
I see Colin has been promoted .
Any of youse guys who took the test should get a free memebership in the JWPP ... dedicated to protecting the doorbells of the innocent.
Haven't seen any of the pests lately. Last time one knocked on my door I told him I had a phone call and would be right back. He waited on my porch for 20 min. before realizing I wasn't coming back.
Maybe he'll start drinking again?
I didn't take no stinkin' test. Jest answer'd the question.
HAHAHA! Are you sure you're not Pope Hilarious III?
I think Dak should start a church. We could call it "Dakmar's Witnesses Incorporated" or DWI for short. We'll spend our time chasing Jehovah's Witnesses around on our motorcycles, until we're either raptured or paid off.
The Watchtower Bible and Teract Society (Jehovah's Witnesses) is just another CULT created by THE NEW WORLD ORDER for neutralizing Christain Patriots (through the no politics doctrine), Terri Schiavo type human sacrifice (through the no blood transfusion doctrine) and divirting people from the genuine truths of the Bible. Thet are just like the Rapture Monkeys, Neo Armstrongites and Scientologists.
Will you let me pass out the candy canes, huh? Huh? ABOVE: Kimberly Flemmel Mourns Her Excommunication From The Jehovah's Witness Congregation After Eating A Candy Cane
I think you've officially gone off your rocker Snake..
Sure, can you do it while riding a motorcycle? I hope she went out in style by washing it down with a cup of coffee.
You are 3% Jehovah's Witness! You have what Jehovah's Witnesses call a "rebellious spirit" and a "bad attitude". Even if you became a Witness, you would be a bad one. You'd probably talk to disfellowshipped people instead of shunning them like you're supposed to. You wouldn't blindly agree to every new teaching of the Watchtower. The only friends you would have at the Kingdom Hall would be the teenagers that think you're cool, and the other "rebels". The Kingdom Hall is not in the cards for you.
I kind of lied about the motorcycle. I don't own one at the moment, but I am planning to buy a new sportster when I get paid this month. As I don't own a car, I put down the bike.
I think it would be easier to let them eat their own ... Kimberly's former church pastor, Owen Smith, was relentless in holding Kimberley responsible for her terrible sin. “It is very well known that Jehovah's Witnesses do not celebrate any holidays or birthdays especially Christmas! If I were to believe Kimberly's claim that she tasted the gluttonous candy of Satan by accident, which I don't, there is no number of new Witnesses that she could recruit to save her,” said Smith. “Events like this one cause wildness and unruly behavior, especially among our younger Witnesses,” said Dr. Kevin Wright, author of the revered Jehovian philosophy book, The Jehovah's Witness. “Events like this one in Seattle could lead to other irrational behavior such as the viewing of a primetime sitcom or the refusal to wear black socks with dress pants."
A boy asks his father to use the motorcycle and the father replies "No, not until you cut your hair!". The boy replies "But father...Jesus had long hair!" to which his father says, "Yeah, but Jesus walked everywhere."
#2. To: 2Trievers (#0)
You are 30% Jehovah's Witness!
#3. To: 2Trievers (#0)
You are 20% Jehovah's Witness! You have some serious changes to make before you can be baptized as a Jehovah's Witness. Your attitude will likely get you labeled as a rebel. Parents will not encourage their children to hang around you or your children, unless there is reason to believe they can help you become a better Jehovah's Witness. It is unlikely that you will ever really fit in at the Kingdom Hall.
#4. To: duckhunter (#3)
You are 17% Jehovah's Witness!
#5. To: mirage (#4)
disfellowshipped
#6. To: 2Trievers (#0)
Should you worship God at the Kingdom Hall with Jehovah's Witnesses?
#7. To: duckhunter (#3)
Definitely suited to weak minded followers.
#8. To: 2Trievers (#0)
You are 20% Jehovah's Witness! You have some serious changes to make before you can be baptized as a Jehovah's Witness. Your attitude will likely get you labeled as a rebel. Parents will not encourage their children to hang around you or your children, unless there is reason to believe they can help you become a better Jehovah's Witness. It is unlikely that you will ever really fit in at the Kingdom Hall.
#9. To: mirage (#4)
#10. To: duckhunter, mirage, Dakmar (#3)
#11. To: christine (#10)
#12. To: 2Trievers (#0)
My results:
#13. To: Dakmar (#5)
#14. To: christine (#10)
i shoulda scored like mirage did
#15. To: mirage (#13)
#16. To: Dakmar (#11)
What is the most important quality you look for in a church leader?
o Honesty, Integrity
o Charisma
o Bible knowledge
o Non-polygamist
#17. To: Flintlock (#16)
#18. To: Dakmar (#17)
I always try to find the one with the coolest car.
#19. To: Flintlock (#18)
#20. To: Dakmar (#19)
You think they'd mind my incredibly foul language?
#21. To: Flintlock (#16)
#22. To: Dakmar (#11)
#23. To: christine (#10)
i shoulda scored like mirage did. i don't know where i effed up on that quiz. :P
#24. To: 2Trievers (#0)
#25. To: 2Trievers (#0)
#26. To: Flintlock (#18)
By Chip Hilton
#27. To: 2Trievers (#26)
After Powell has washed and waxed the Popemobile, he will drive it to the White House.
#28. To: duckhunter, wakeup, Dakmar, mirage, CWRWinger, christine, Flintlock, Mr Nuke Buzzcut (#27)
#29. To: 2Trievers (#28)
dedicated to protecting the doorbells of the innocent.
#30. To: 2Trievers (#26)
He told us he was going to change its name to the Bushmobile because that’s what he called his first car in high school.”
#31. To: 2Trievers (#28)
youse guys who took the test
#32. To: Flintlock (#30)
#33. To: 2Trievers, Dakmar, Christine (#28)
#34. To: 2Trievers (#0)
#35. To: Flintlock (#33)
#36. To: Coral Snake (#34)
Terri Schiavo type human sacrifice
#37. To: 2Trievers (#35)
Will you let me pass out the candy canes, huh? Huh?
Kimberly Flemmel Mourns Her Excommunication From The Jehovah's Witness Congregation After Eating A Candy Cane
#38. To: 2Trievers (#0)
#39. To: All (#38)
You are 3% Jehovah's Witness!
#40. To: Flintlock (#37)
#41. To: crack monkey (#39)
Top • Page Up • Full Thread • Page Down • Bottom/Latest