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Religion
See other Religion Articles

Title: Belief-O-Matic
Source: Belief-O-Matic
URL Source: http://www.beliefnet.com/story/76/story_7665_1.html
Published: Apr 20, 2005
Author: Unknonw
Post Date: 2005-04-20 10:36:46 by crack monkey
Keywords: Belief-O-Matic
Views: 1759
Comments: 87

Here's an interesting site that was up on El Pee. It tells you if you belong to the proper religion or not. It doesn't tell you if you are going to hell, but it still seems useful. Here is the link:

Belief-O-Matic

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Begin Trace Mode for Comment # 61.

#7. To: crack monkey (#0)

I was amazed to learn that I'm a Jehovah's Witness.

Lod  posted on  2005-04-20   11:32:56 ET  Reply   Untrace   Trace   Private Reply  

I was amazed to learn that I'm a Jehovah's Witness.

I'm an Orthodox Jew/Islam.

I guess I should just shoot myself and see if I can collect the virgins.

Flintlock  posted on  2005-04-20   11:37:40 ET  Reply   Untrace   Trace   Private Reply  

holy sh!t, like flint, i'm 100% orthodox judaism! and islamic 97%!

christine  posted on  2005-04-20   11:40:57 ET  Reply   Untrace   Trace   Private Reply  

holy sh!t, like flint, i'm 100% orthodox judaism! and islamic 97%!

Shalom, Salaam, looks like I'm in the same club.
I am pondering which to join, I think I look more dashing as a sheik than a Lubavitch.

1776  posted on  2005-04-20   13:50:00 ET  Reply   Untrace   Trace   Private Reply  

me thinks something strange is going on here. it's some sort of mind control conspiracy.

christine  posted on  2005-04-20   14:13:50 ET  Reply   Untrace   Trace   Private Reply  

Check this out. I have no idea what it means.

1. Unitarian Universalism (100%)
2. Nontheist (97%)
3. Secular Humanism (97%)
4. Mainline to Liberal Christian Protestants (85%)
5. Theravada Buddhism (83%)
6. Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-Day Saints (Mormons) (80%)
7. Liberal Quakers (79%)
8. Christian Science (Church of Christ, Scientist) (75%)
9. Mainline to Conservative Christian/Protestant (72%)
10. Bahá'í Faith (71%)
11. Jehovah's Witness (62%)
12. Neo-Pagan (57%)
13. New Thought (48%)
14. Eastern Orthodox (45%)
15. Islam (45%)
16. Orthodox Judaism (45%)
17. Roman Catholic (45%)
18. Sikhism (45%)
19. Mahayana Buddhism (40%)
20. Hinduism (36%)
21. Jainism (36%)
22. Orthodox Quaker (36%)
23. Reform Judaism (36%)
24. Scientology (36%)
25. Taoism (34%)
26. New Age(29%)
27. Seventh Day Adventist (22%)

Esso  posted on  2005-04-20   14:30:56 ET  Reply   Untrace   Trace   Private Reply  

Oh, thank Bog! Another non-theist to keep me company.

Mr Nuke Buzzcut  posted on  2005-04-20   14:47:58 ET  Reply   Untrace   Trace   Private Reply  

Another non-theist to keep me company.

Can we at least add some squiggly things to the name?

Esso  posted on  2005-04-20   14:51:42 ET  Reply   Untrace   Trace   Private Reply  

Can we at least add some squiggly things to the name?

Well, Esso has two squigglies already. But, if you must be a glutton, we could add two of the other squigglies and call ourselves "Essoñiañs".

Mr Nuke Buzzcut  posted on  2005-04-20   15:01:57 ET  Reply   Untrace   Trace   Private Reply  

"Essoñiañs"

How about "Eßøñiåçs"? Lotsa squiggleys there, and as everyone knows; good sqiuggleys make for good religion.

Esso  posted on  2005-04-20   19:29:40 ET  Reply   Untrace   Trace   Private Reply  

"Eßøñiåçs"

Two questions.

How do you pronounce it?

Will the church services be nice and short?

crack monkey  posted on  2005-04-20   19:36:02 ET  Reply   Untrace   Trace   Private Reply  

"Eßøñiåçs"

Two questions. How do you pronounce it?

Essoniacs.

Will the church services be nice and short?

Only as long as the booze holds out.

Can Dakmar be the Pope of the Eßøñiåçs?

Yes, his participation is mandatory.

Pope? Ahhhhhhh!!! Too much responsibility!

Time for you to step up to the plate Dak, ol' buddy.

ps, stay away from the souse loaf

It is strictly forbidden.

All you've got to do is drive around in the Pope-mobile, mumble and throw water on people.

Looks like we got us a religion, go ahead and send me the money and I'll get started on the bar...uh, church. See y'all Sunday.

Esso  posted on  2005-04-20   20:16:56 ET  Reply   Untrace   Trace   Private Reply  

        There are no replies to Comment # 61.

End Trace Mode for Comment # 61.

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