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Religion
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Title: Belief-O-Matic
Source: Belief-O-Matic
URL Source: http://www.beliefnet.com/story/76/story_7665_1.html
Published: Apr 20, 2005
Author: Unknonw
Post Date: 2005-04-20 10:36:46 by crack monkey
Keywords: Belief-O-Matic
Views: 2432
Comments: 87

Here's an interesting site that was up on El Pee. It tells you if you belong to the proper religion or not. It doesn't tell you if you are going to hell, but it still seems useful. Here is the link:

Belief-O-Matic

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Begin Trace Mode for Comment # 68.

#7. To: crack monkey (#0)

I was amazed to learn that I'm a Jehovah's Witness.

Lod  posted on  2005-04-20   11:32:56 ET  Reply   Untrace   Trace   Private Reply  

I was amazed to learn that I'm a Jehovah's Witness.

I'm an Orthodox Jew/Islam.

I guess I should just shoot myself and see if I can collect the virgins.

Flintlock  posted on  2005-04-20   11:37:40 ET  Reply   Untrace   Trace   Private Reply  

holy sh!t, like flint, i'm 100% orthodox judaism! and islamic 97%!

christine  posted on  2005-04-20   11:40:57 ET  Reply   Untrace   Trace   Private Reply  

holy sh!t, like flint, i'm 100% orthodox judaism! and islamic 97%!

Shalom, Salaam, looks like I'm in the same club.
I am pondering which to join, I think I look more dashing as a sheik than a Lubavitch.

1776  posted on  2005-04-20   13:50:00 ET  Reply   Untrace   Trace   Private Reply  

me thinks something strange is going on here. it's some sort of mind control conspiracy.

christine  posted on  2005-04-20   14:13:50 ET  Reply   Untrace   Trace   Private Reply  

Check this out. I have no idea what it means.

1. Unitarian Universalism (100%)
2. Nontheist (97%)
3. Secular Humanism (97%)
4. Mainline to Liberal Christian Protestants (85%)
5. Theravada Buddhism (83%)
6. Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-Day Saints (Mormons) (80%)
7. Liberal Quakers (79%)
8. Christian Science (Church of Christ, Scientist) (75%)
9. Mainline to Conservative Christian/Protestant (72%)
10. Bahá'í Faith (71%)
11. Jehovah's Witness (62%)
12. Neo-Pagan (57%)
13. New Thought (48%)
14. Eastern Orthodox (45%)
15. Islam (45%)
16. Orthodox Judaism (45%)
17. Roman Catholic (45%)
18. Sikhism (45%)
19. Mahayana Buddhism (40%)
20. Hinduism (36%)
21. Jainism (36%)
22. Orthodox Quaker (36%)
23. Reform Judaism (36%)
24. Scientology (36%)
25. Taoism (34%)
26. New Age(29%)
27. Seventh Day Adventist (22%)

Esso  posted on  2005-04-20   14:30:56 ET  Reply   Untrace   Trace   Private Reply  

Oh, thank Bog! Another non-theist to keep me company.

Mr Nuke Buzzcut  posted on  2005-04-20   14:47:58 ET  Reply   Untrace   Trace   Private Reply  

Another non-theist to keep me company.

Can we at least add some squiggly things to the name?

Esso  posted on  2005-04-20   14:51:42 ET  Reply   Untrace   Trace   Private Reply  

Can we at least add some squiggly things to the name?

Well, Esso has two squigglies already. But, if you must be a glutton, we could add two of the other squigglies and call ourselves "Essoñiañs".

Mr Nuke Buzzcut  posted on  2005-04-20   15:01:57 ET  Reply   Untrace   Trace   Private Reply  

"Essoñiañs"

How about "Eßøñiåçs"? Lotsa squiggleys there, and as everyone knows; good sqiuggleys make for good religion.

Esso  posted on  2005-04-20   19:29:40 ET  Reply   Untrace   Trace   Private Reply  

Essoñiañs"

Can Dakmar be the Pope of the Essoñiañs?

crack monkey  posted on  2005-04-20   19:37:39 ET  Reply   Untrace   Trace   Private Reply  

Pope? Ahhhhhhh!!! Too much responsibility!

ps, stay away from the souse loaf

That's a 3 year old story, but for some reason I remembered seeing "souse loaf" in the deli, and remembered it sounded disgusting.

....

I just looked it up, I guess souse is same thing as head cheese, which I really wasn't sure what that was either.

Dakmar  posted on  2005-04-20   19:49:39 ET  Reply   Untrace   Trace   Private Reply  

In Scotland, they serve up the tasty??? Haggis which, apparently, is all those parts of a sheep no sane (or sober) human would ordinarily consume. They grind all that up, mix it with oatmeal and spices, stuff it all into a sheep's stomach and bake it up to a yummy goodness then parading it into the dining room accompanied with bagpipes and champagne (and much more scotch whisky). After the scotch, I went to Burger King.

wbales  posted on  2005-04-20   20:10:33 ET  Reply   Untrace   Trace   Private Reply  

They grind all that up, mix it with oatmeal and spices, stuff it all into a sheep's stomach

Blech.. sounds something like goetta.. it's oats, ground beef and ground pork..

Zipporah  posted on  2005-04-20   20:12:06 ET  Reply   Untrace   Trace   Private Reply  

There is a french dish that is a cooked section of pig intestine from the part half way between pig food and pig shit. It smells like pig shit. I can't remember the name. I'm not making this up. I really saw a guy eat it once.

crack monkey  posted on  2005-04-20   20:22:38 ET  Reply   Untrace   Trace   Private Reply  

There is a french dish that is a cooked section of pig intestine from the part half way between pig food and pig shit. It smells like pig shit. I can't remember the name. I'm not making this up. I really saw a guy eat it once.

I think they call that Paris (where also a lot a wierd stuff is eaten) delicacy Le Pig Shit.

The best food in Europe is in Italy (excepting squiggly sea critters).

wbales  posted on  2005-04-20   20:27:11 ET  Reply   Untrace   Trace   Private Reply  

If you read the Stephen King book "The Stand" the old black woman eats something called pig squeezings. I think this is the same thing. It's an old peasant dish that some really fancy restuarants in paris feature sometimes. When people go out they eat it sort of on a dare.

crack monkey  posted on  2005-04-20   20:30:37 ET  Reply   Untrace   Trace   Private Reply  

        There are no replies to Comment # 68.

End Trace Mode for Comment # 68.

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