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All is Vanity
See other All is Vanity Articles

Title: Conservatives defend Bush’s Memorial Day actions
Source: moi
URL Source: http://moi.com
Published: May 29, 2007
Author: Moi
Post Date: 2007-05-29 00:34:13 by Mekons4
Keywords: None
Views: 196
Comments: 3

Conservatives defend Bush’s Memorial Day actions

Conservative pundits reacted angrily to an AP report that President Bush relieved himself on the grave of a Staff Sergeant who had died in Iraq shortly before delivering his Memorial Day speech at the nation’s foremost military graveyard. The report admitted that four Secret Service personnel shielded Bush from view of most of the nearly 10,000 attendees, but several reporters who followed Bush to the nearby grave saw a distinct yellow stream, accompanied by sounds of satisfaction and followed by a loud, smelly passing of wind.

“It’s typical of the drive-by media to distort every presidential word and action,” said Rush Limbaugh, perhaps the country’s top talk show host. “What man among us has never taken a leak in the wild? Liberals are too unmanly, saving it up until they can urinate unobserved, since they have such tiny members they would never wave their pathetic wands in public.”

Sean Hannity, another leading radio commentator, added that “manly men like Mr. Bush are constantly under attack by liberals of questionable sexuality. These “men” probably squat to pee.”

Melanie Morgan, another radio personality, agreed. “Liberals come into the ladies’ room all the time, I see them, and squat to pee. I stand up, like any good Republican would. Oh, you meant male liberals?”

Ann Coulter, nationally syndicated columnist, noted that “true patriots like Mr. Bush water the graves of the fallen, unlike the commie, limp-wristed, fag slimebags in the Democratic party who wouldn’t spend a dime to water the graves of our fallen heros.”

A Democratic senator, who asked to be un-named, said, “I’ve seen it all. The guy pisses on the grave of a kid he killed, and these shitbuckets want to blame it on liberals. Hitler had nothing on these creeps.”

Coulter, who is in hiding after defrauding Florida’s voting laws, said that she would get some of her friends on the case of finding the “traitor” who claimed that President Bush pissed on the grave of a “hero", who would have happily killed any Democrat I named, if he wasn’t already dead.”

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#1. To: Mekons4 (#0)

Baron Munchausen rides again. Great yarn, thanks.

karelian  posted on  2007-05-29   0:53:04 ET  Reply   Trace   Private Reply  


#2. To: Mekons4 (#0)

the scary part is it actually sounded plausible

kiki  posted on  2007-05-29   0:59:37 ET  Reply   Trace   Private Reply  


#3. To: kiki (#2)

the scary part is it actually sounded plausible

You are so right! I can not tell a lie; when I first started on the story I admit I was taken aback, as in, WTF has that damn fool done again!

karelian  posted on  2007-05-29   1:30:30 ET  Reply   Trace   Private Reply  


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