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Title: Rednecks Save the Space Program
Source:
Seagulls Calling (blog)
URL Source: http://seagullscalling.com/?p=81
Published: Jun 16, 2007
Author: unknown
Post Date: 2007-06-16 11:08:52 by Calamity
Keywords: NASA, rednecks, ductape
Views: 30
Rednecks Save the Space Program I recently received an email with the subject of “Redneck Time Out”. Attached was this photo. At first I thought it looked like an obvious case of child abuse. Then I saw that the baby was pretty relaxed. [The condition of the stuffed duck was questionable. He looked miserable. He probably had spinal cord damage as a result of being hung by the neck.] Little did I know that the parents of this child were possibly NASA employees practicing standard agency procedural policy. Yep, today I learned the truth. Confused? That’s OK. Stick with me. The link was on tonight’s news: NASA’s in-flight emergency plans cover astronaut going berserk. Question - What happens if an astronaut goes nuts in space? Answer – The other crewmembers will bind his or her wrists and ankles with DUCT TAPE, tie him or her down with a bungee cord and inject him or her with tranquilizers. No kidding. It is in the official flight manual. We pay billions for the space program and the security of the mission can depend on duct tape and bungee cords! But there is another step. “Talk with the patient (crazy fellow traveler) while you are restraining him,” the instructions say. “Explain what you are doing, and that you are using a restraint to ensure that he or she is safe.” For the kid/duck example above, it would go like this. Listen here kid. One more move and you and the duck will be dropped off a bridge with only a springy bungee to save you from hitting the rocks below. And you better be real relaxed while bouncing around or your uncle Joe will shoot you with a tranquilizer gun. I thought I heard it wrong, so I searched through the internet to confirm these silly rules. Not only did I find the Associated Press story, which confirmed the news story, but I also found a NASA Does Duct Tape web site. http://www.octanecreative.com/ducttape/NASA/ Apparently NASA has a long history of using duct tape. You just have to go to this site. [There is pictorial evidence.] Otherwise you will think I made this all up. They fixed jet packs, the outside of the shuttle, air filters, and the lunar rover with duct tape. They even made a dining room table with trash and duct tape. Sorry guys, but that is just pitiful.
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