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Editorial
See other Editorial Articles

Title: General Butt Naked
Source: [None]
URL Source: http://www.e-z-smith.com/butt.html
Published: Jul 4, 2007
Author: http://www.e-z-smith.com/butt.html
Post Date: 2007-07-04 11:21:48 by tom007
Keywords: None
Views: 143
Comments: 7

General Butt Naked

On October 11, Liberia will hold elections. The country is mired in poverty, the electorate is largely illiterate, but despite a few problems, elections look set to happen without too much chaos next week. Liberia sure has come a long way since the days of General Butt Naked.

Who the hell is that? Ahha, you haven’t heard of General Butt Naked! Liberia produced the most outrageously wild characters in its decade of war: General No-Mother-No-Father, General Peanut Butter, General Fuck-Me-Quick, General Dragon Master, General Housebreaker, and perhaps the most famous, General Butt Naked. This guy was particularly… erm… “visible.” He fought stripped to the buff save a pair of tennis shoes and a kalishnikov. Read a PG-13 rated version account of his drugged youth army here. I’ll give you a more brutal narrative of his work below.

Most of the aforementioned generals met a sticky end, but not General Butt Naked. Today, he’s found a more reputable line of work as a preacher. Yes, preaching the word of God on Broad Street in Monrovia is the Reverend Joshua Milton Blahyi.

The reverend is pretty honest about his former line of work. Just listen to this article recounting the general’s past:

He admitted to killing and ordering the killings of over 10,000 people and eating the hearts of some of his victims to solidify his charms and to fulfill the rules of his rituals… He said parts extracted from his victims were then sold on demand to traditional voodoo and witch doctors, who would in turn produce the necessary charms that were sold out to people who were seeking higher and public offices in Liberia.

Speaking of his reason to change careers, here’s what the now retired general had to say:

So, before leading my troops into battle, we would get drunk and drugged up, sacrifice a local teenager, drink their blood, then strip down to our shoes and go into battle wearing colourful wigs and carrying dainty purses we’d looted from civilians. We’d slaughter anyone we saw, chop their heads off and use them as soccer balls. We were nude, fearless, drunk and homicidal. We killed hundreds of people – so many I lost count. But in June last year God telephoned me and told me that I was not the hero I considered myself to be, so I stopped and became a preacher.

Maybe there’s hope for Africa after all. (1 image)

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#1. To: All, indrid cold (#0)

Way too weird ping

"The penalty good men pay for indifference to public affairs is to be ruled by evil men" Plato

tom007  posted on  2007-07-04   11:26:12 ET  Reply   Trace   Private Reply  


#2. To: tom007 (#0)

He admitted to killing and ordering the killings of over 10,000 people and eating the hearts of some of his victims to solidify his charms and to fulfill the rules of his rituals

So, before leading my troops into battle, we would get drunk and drugged up, sacrifice a local teenager, drink their blood, then strip down to our shoes and go into battle wearing colourful wigs and carrying dainty purses we’d looted from civilians. We’d slaughter anyone we saw, chop their heads off and use them as soccer balls. We were nude, fearless, drunk and homicidal. We killed hundreds of people – so many I lost count. But in June last year God telephoned me and told me that I was not the hero I considered myself to be, so I stopped and became a preacher.

dear lord.. he went from one hideous lifestyle to another..

Zipporah  posted on  2007-07-04   11:29:11 ET  Reply   Trace   Private Reply  


#3. To: Zipporah (#2)

de ja vue

Liberia was populated by compensated and freed slaves under Monroe !

They preferred even then the lap of succor spoon fed.

Look at your future....IMNSHO....at the hands of the same people.

JCHarris  posted on  2007-07-04   11:31:29 ET  Reply   Trace   Private Reply  


#4. To: Zipporah (#2)

dear lord.. he went from one hideous lifestyle to another..

I wonder if there is anything like this in Hagee's biography...

Remember...G-d saved more animals than people on the ark. www.siameserescue.org

who knows what evil  posted on  2007-07-04   11:31:51 ET  Reply   Trace   Private Reply  


#5. To: tom007 (#0)

sacrifice a local teenager,

I sacrificed several teenage girls to what I used to call "the sashweight of love."

I guess lots of people don't know what a sashweight is anymore. ;-)

Freeper motto: I read, but do not understand, I write, but make no sense, I think, but nothing happens.

YertleTurtle  posted on  2007-07-04   11:39:34 ET  Reply   Trace   Private Reply  


#6. To: tom007 (#0) (Edited)

I found this story over a year ago and I've been looking for it again ever since!

Thank you!

Dayum!

Try Googling or even a wiki search for "General Buck Naked" and you'll see that it can't be located without his birth name!

HOUNDDAWG  posted on  2007-07-04   11:39:44 ET  Reply   Trace   Private Reply  


#7. To: tom007 (#0)

But in June last year God telephoned me and told me that I was not the hero I considered myself to be,

Can someone give him the WH directory?

"The main purpose of the Council on Foreign Relations is promoting the disarmament of U.S. sovereignty and national independence and submergence into an all powerful, one world government." -- Rear Admiral Chester Ward Rear Admiral US Navy (retired), CFR member for 16 years, Judge Advocate General of the Navy 1956-60

Calamity  posted on  2007-07-04   11:50:09 ET  Reply   Trace   Private Reply  


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