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Pious Perverts
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Title: Family Circle [fiction by TBF]
Source: [None]
URL Source: [None]
Published: Jun 1, 2005
Author: TBF
Post Date: 2005-06-01 23:12:21 by toddbrendanfahey
Keywords: [fiction, Family, Circle
Views: 267
Comments: 18

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Begin Trace Mode for Comment # 13.

#1. To: Zipporah, Jethro Tull, 1776, wbales, RidinShotgun, Burkeman1, Zoroaster, h-a-l-f-w-i-t-t, mugwort, Diana, Eoghan, gengis gandhi, griper, D_Joyce, lightmind, orangedog, TommyTheMadArtist, rattler, Don, BrianS, NOLAJBS (#0)

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toddbrendanfahey  posted on  2005-06-01   23:18:03 ET  Reply   Untrace   Trace   Private Reply  

So, who won the tennis match?

Fred Mertz  posted on  2005-06-01   23:39:28 ET  Reply   Untrace   Trace   Private Reply  

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toddbrendanfahey  posted on  2005-06-01   23:43:32 ET  Reply   Untrace   Trace   Private Reply  

you've got to write me a happy ending!

christine  posted on  2005-06-02   0:11:18 ET  Reply   Untrace   Trace   Private Reply  

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toddbrendanfahey  posted on  2005-06-02   0:21:42 ET  Reply   Untrace   Trace   Private Reply  

A lot can happen over 800 pages...

Eight hundred pages? Dude, you need to switch substances. Lay off the speedy stuff and move into the slower things, like trading in the caffeine for a nice amber ale. Take a breath, slow down a notch or two, try using fewer words to say more. Practice haiku, that'll get you in the right mood. Use rich words and paint with a wide brush, instead of the staccato pontillism of profanity and a profusion of verbs. Just my humble opinion.

Elliott Jackalope  posted on  2005-06-02   0:34:18 ET  Reply   Untrace   Trace   Private Reply  

#14. To: Elliott Jackalope (#13)

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toddbrendanfahey  posted on  2005-06-02 00:38:05 ET  Reply   Untrace   Trace   Private Reply  

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