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Title: Thanksgiving Horror Stories
Source: various
URL Source: [None]
Published: Nov 22, 2007
Author: unknown
Post Date: 2007-11-22 17:23:54 by Zipporah
Keywords: None
Views: 192
Comments: 15

I heard the following Thanksgiving horror storyon the radio and thought it were hilarious..

At a family gathering a woman said that her mother-in-law was recently divorced after 27 years and this was the first Thanksgiving after the divorce.

The mother-in-law decided to share a poem with her family and they began making fun of her poem.. and she got furious.. and angrily said:

'You dont know what I've been through all these years with your father. He kept wanting to f*** me up the a** and I have the hemorrhoids to prove it!!"

Uh I bet that ended their laughter.. well ..hmm probably not :P


Poster Comment:

Any Thanksgiving horror stories to share??

Post Comment   Private Reply   Ignore Thread  


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#1. To: Zipporah (#0)

Any Thanksgiving horror stories to share??

Other than when I was 9 or 10 and both boxes of Stovetop Stuffing my mother bought came home with bugs in them? That was an interesting discovery to make after everyone had started eating. The old girl has never lived that one down.

"I'd like to live just long enough to be there when they cut off your head and stick it on a pike as a warning to the next ten generations that some favors come with too high a price." Vir Cotto, Babylon 5

orangedog  posted on  2007-11-22   17:54:41 ET  Reply   Trace   Private Reply  


#2. To: orangedog (#1)

Gack! I was at my ex- mother-in-law's having dinner.. she served beef barley soup.. I asked what was in the soup.. she said..oh those are spices.. I asked ..'with legs?' Well that was the end of the dinner..

Zipporah  posted on  2007-11-22   18:22:56 ET  Reply   Trace   Private Reply  


#3. To: Zipporah (#2)

I asked what was in the soup.. she said..oh those are spices.. I asked ..'with legs?' Well that was the end of the dinner..

And people wonder why I do all the cooking and only like eating at home.

My hands are always dirty, but my conscience is always clean.

Esso  posted on  2007-11-22   18:35:29 ET  Reply   Trace   Private Reply  


#4. To: Zipporah (#0)

one t-day, i tried baking a turkey breast which was taking many more hours to get done than the instructions read..actually, i don't think the damn thing was ever going to cook. anyway, we weren't having company so i could allow myself a temper tantrum. guess where the turkey breast ended up? i took it outside and from my upper deck dumped it into the backyard.

christine  posted on  2007-11-22   18:49:02 ET  Reply   Trace   Private Reply  


#5. To: christine (#4)

one t-day, i tried baking a turkey breast which was taking many more hours to get done than the instructions read.

Did you thaw it first? :P

Guess the critters had a happy Thanksgiving :P

Zipporah  posted on  2007-11-22   18:50:05 ET  Reply   Trace   Private Reply  


#6. To: Zipporah (#5)

Did you thaw it first?

that may be what i did wrong :P

christine  posted on  2007-11-22   18:53:51 ET  Reply   Trace   Private Reply  


#7. To: christine (#6)

LOL~

Zipporah  posted on  2007-11-22   18:55:15 ET  Reply   Trace   Private Reply  


#8. To: Zipporah (#0)

Bob and Tom.

I've heard that story on their program, too.

Couldn't believe the woman said that to the entire family!

Fortune favors the prepared mind. A zombie, however, prefers it raw.

YertleTurtle  posted on  2007-11-22   19:00:33 ET  Reply   Trace   Private Reply  


#9. To: Zipporah (#0)

lolol

What North American Union?

Don't wait - send Ron Paul 2008 some FRNs right NOW!

Tea Party '07

Have you seen THIS yet? Pass it around...

FOH  posted on  2007-11-22   19:03:51 ET  Reply   Trace   Private Reply  


#10. To: YertleTurtle (#8)

Yep it was..~ the other story I thought was so funny.. was the story about the man who decided to deep fry a turkey.. the oil overflowed and spilled on the ground of course catching on fire.. his brother-in-law freaked knocking over a propane tank dislodging the valve .. it caught on fire and flew like a rocket hitting his brother-in-law's car .. which in turn caught the garage on fire~ he said his brother-in-law isnt speaking to him now :P

Zipporah  posted on  2007-11-22   19:12:00 ET  Reply   Trace   Private Reply  


#11. To: FOH (#9)

I thought that was hilarious..

Zipporah  posted on  2007-11-22   19:12:19 ET  Reply   Trace   Private Reply  


#12. To: Zipporah (#10)

Yep it was..~ the other story I thought was so funny.. was the story about the man who decided to deep fry a turkey.. the oil overflowed and spilled on the ground of course catching on fire.. his brother-in-law freaked knocking over a propane tank dislodging the valve .. it caught on fire and flew like a rocket hitting his brother-in-law's car .. which in turn caught the garage on fire~ he said his brother-in-law isnt speaking to him now :P

I missed that one, but I vaguely remember one about a guy who was trying to kill ants and kept pouring gasoline down their hole, and when he lit it there was a firefall and I think he lost his eyebrows.

Fortune favors the prepared mind. A zombie, however, prefers it raw.

YertleTurtle  posted on  2007-11-22   19:40:54 ET  Reply   Trace   Private Reply  


#13. To: Zipporah (#0)

First time I ever cooked a turkey was down in Phoenix. Future hubby and I had apartment and we invited the landlady over to share in all the goodies.

Did I say goodies? Well...........

Oh, I remembered well that a person is to remove the 'parts' from the turkeys butt before stuffing and baking it. I must not have ever seen my Momma remove anything from the neck cavity. As the day went along, we'd get a whiff of 'paper' cooking. And it got stronger and stronger and stronger. When I took the turkey out to remove the foil to start basting, WHEW!

Landlady was a jewel; we laughed and all went out to eat.

I've made sure both my girls know there are two cavities in the T-bird to check.

rowdee  posted on  2007-11-22   20:47:43 ET  Reply   Trace   Private Reply  


#14. To: rowdee (#13)

OH I made that mistake many years ago.. only I didnt remove anything from EITHER cavity.. yuk! Only we didnt go out to eat.. I just served it .. only I didnt have any :P

Zipporah  posted on  2007-11-22   20:53:25 ET  Reply   Trace   Private Reply  


#15. To: Zipporah (#14)

The humiliation was awful. Our landlady was a grandmotherly type woman, who was just as sweet as she looked. I just knew I could cook a good complete meal! What a rude awakening......

Well, at least it wasn't my inlaws. :)

rowdee  posted on  2007-11-22   21:58:00 ET  Reply   Trace   Private Reply  


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