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All is Vanity
See other All is Vanity Articles

Title: Humor, Jokes, anyone? anyone?
Source: [None]
URL Source: http://EarlSource
Published: Dec 24, 2007
Author: all
Post Date: 2007-12-24 15:37:10 by Peppa
Keywords: Humor, Christmas, Music
Views: 2677
Comments: 79

I expect you all to try this cookie recipe and let me know how the cookies turned out. Merry Christmas.

Christmas Cookie Recipe

1 cup of water 1 tsp baking soda 1 cup of sugar 1 tsp salt 1 cup of brown sugar lemon juice 4 large eggs 1 cup nuts 2 cups of dried fruit 1 bottle Crown Royal

- Sample the Crown Royal to check quality.

- Take a large bowl, check the Crown Royal again, to be sure it is of the highest quality, pour one level cup and drink.

- Turn on the electric mixer...Beat one cup of butter in a large fluffy bowl.

- Add one teaspoon of sugar...Beat again.

- At this point it's best to make sure the Crown Royal is still OK, try another cup.. just in case.

- Turn off the mixer thingy.

- Break 2 leggs and add to the bowl and chuck in the cup of dried fruit.

- Pick the frigging fruit off floor...

- Mix on the turner.

- If the fried druit gets stuck in the beaterers just pry it loose with a dewscriver.

- Sample the Crown Royal to check for tonsisticity.

- Next, sift two cups of salt, or something.... who giveshz a sheet.

- Check the Crown Royal.

- Now shift the lemon juice and strain your nuts.

- Add one table.

- Add a spoon of ar, or somefink.... whatever you can find.

- Greash the oven.

- Turn the cake tin 360 degrees and try not to fall over.

- Don't forget to beat off the turner.

- Finally, throw the bowl through the window.

- Finish the bottle of Crown Royal.

- Make sure to put the stove in the dishwasher.

Cherry Mistmas


Poster Comment:

Remember, if Christmas isn't found in your heart, you won't find it under a tree." ~ Charlotte Carpenter.


Post Comment   Private Reply   Ignore Thread  


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Begin Trace Mode for Comment # 42.

#1. To: Peppa (#0)

Remember, if Christmas isn't found in your heart, you won't find it under a tree." ~ Charlotte Carpenter.

It's not in my heart, and I don't have a tree. Pfffft...bah, humbug!

who knows what evil  posted on  2007-12-24   15:46:50 ET  Reply   Untrace   Trace   Private Reply  


#3. To: who knows what evil (#1)

What did christianity ever do better than enslaving everyone to the politics of zionism. That's what I want to know.

nobody  posted on  2007-12-24   15:51:05 ET  Reply   Untrace   Trace   Private Reply  


#6. To: nobody (#3)

Catholics, Greek and Russian Orthodox, Lutherans and Presbyterians do not worship Zionism. The Presbyterians boycott certain products due to Israeli treatment of Palestinians.

robin  posted on  2007-12-24   15:57:30 ET  Reply   Untrace   Trace   Private Reply  


#11. To: robin (#6)

Apparently the humor thread has a wicked fork in the road.

Peppa  posted on  2007-12-24   16:02:38 ET  Reply   Untrace   Trace   Private Reply  


#12. To: Peppa (#11)

I noticed that but it's an interesting path.

robin  posted on  2007-12-24   16:04:19 ET  Reply   Untrace   Trace   Private Reply  


#24. To: robin (#12)

Someone says "fork" on a thread and I immediately assume I now can only be read by agents of chaos.

nobody  posted on  2007-12-24   16:29:12 ET  Reply   Untrace   Trace   Private Reply  


#28. To: nobody (#24)

I immediately assume I now can only be read by agents of chaos.

You mean the bad guys from the TV show 'The Man From U N C L E'?

Peppa  posted on  2007-12-24   16:34:41 ET  Reply   Untrace   Trace   Private Reply  


#30. To: Peppa (#28)

Damn, I missed that. I forgot all about them!

robin  posted on  2007-12-24   16:37:14 ET  Reply   Untrace   Trace   Private Reply  


#32. To: robin (#30)

Damn, I missed that. I forgot all about them!

Check for your instructions.

There will be a man in the mailbox at the Main St. Post Office.

Knock on the side of the box, one time. Open the flapper once, turn around 3 times, and humm 'Play that Funky Music White Boy'.

Okaaaaaaaay. Go!

Peppa  posted on  2007-12-24   16:41:24 ET  Reply   Untrace   Trace   Private Reply  


#35. To: Peppa (#32)

Burn all reindeer tapes immediately.

nobody  posted on  2007-12-24   16:58:31 ET  Reply   Untrace   Trace   Private Reply  


#41. To: nobody, Peppa (#35) (Edited)

www.truveo.com/The-Iowa-Scuba-Affair/id/3758138918

50 minutes

The Iowa Scuba Affair

Solo is in Iowa when he is attacked by a soldier from a nearby secret airbase. The soldier is killed, and when Solo examines the man's motorcycle, he finds that it contains a scuba suit. He goes to... Solo is in Iowa when he is attacked by a soldier from a nearby secret airbase. The soldier is killed, and when Solo examines the man's motorcycle, he finds that it contains a scuba suit. He goes to the airbase to investigate, but he and a pretty young girl he befriends are nearly killed several times. Still being pursued by unknown murderers, Solo finds out that political extremists are planning to steal a nuclear-armed aircraft from the base to use it as extortion against a Latin American country. Cast: David McCallum, Leo G. Carroll

All the girls at my school had a crush on David McCallum. We thought Solo really old and well, old. ;p

(Does this count as yet another fork in the road?)

robin  posted on  2007-12-24   17:07:30 ET  Reply   Untrace   Trace   Private Reply  


#42. To: robin (#41)

Age discrimination right there.

Cynicom  posted on  2007-12-24   17:08:43 ET  Reply   Untrace   Trace   Private Reply  


Replies to Comment # 42.

#44. To: Cynicom (#42)

Well, we thought 8th graders were old too!

robin  posted on  2007-12-24 17:10:14 ET  Reply   Untrace   Trace   Private Reply  


End Trace Mode for Comment # 42.

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