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Title: Books That Will Never Be Written
Source: My Own Widdle Brain
URL Source: http://Nope
Published: Jul 1, 2005
Author: Bob Wallace
Post Date: 2005-07-01 21:12:14 by YertleTurtle
Keywords: Written, Books, Never
Views: 257
Comments: 45

Bringing Jesus Back by Killing Palestinians, by Hal Lindsey and Jerry Falwell.

Smoke, Booze, Gamble, Stuff Your Fat Face and Stick Your Nose in Other's Business!, by William Bennett.

As Short and Ugly as Simon Bar Sinister, by William Kristol.

The Autobiography of a Little Pissant, by Douglas Feith.

How a Pimple on My Butt Saved My Ass, by Rush Limbaugh.

Souffle' Restaurants for Ex-Cons, by Richard Perle.

Living with a Hopelessly Bad Haircut, by David Frum.

Incurious George and the Drones of Death, by George Bush.

Your Monkey Wife, but Not Mine, by Pete Singer.

How Many Americans Were Killed in What War?, by Paul Wolfowitz.

Living Without Testicles, by Max Boot.

New and Improved Mass Murder, by Henry Kissinger.

1,001 Uses for a Leash, by Lynndie England.

My Mom Got Me My Job, by Jonah Goldberg.

I wrote these for my own amusement. Everyone is invited to contribute. --YertleTurtle.

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Begin Trace Mode for Comment # 15.

#7. To: YertleTurtle (#0)

There are thing we know that we know. There are known unknowns. That is to say there are things that we now know we don't know. But there are also unknown unknowns. There are things we don't know we don't know. So when we do the best we can and we pull all this information together, and we then say well that's basically what we see as the situation, that is really only the known knowns and the known unknowns. And each year, we discover a few more of those unknown unknowns." Donald Rumsfeld, February 12, 2002 Press Conference at NATO Headquarters, Brussels, Belgium

tom007  posted on  2005-07-01   22:23:11 ET  Reply   Untrace   Trace   Private Reply  

There are thing we know that we know. There are known unknowns. That is to say there are things that we now know we don't know. But there are also unknown unknowns. There are things we don't know we don't know. So when we do the best we can and we pull all this information together, and we then say well that's basically what we see as the situation, that is really only the known knowns and the known unknowns. And each year, we discover a few more of those unknown unknowns." Donald Rumsfeld, February 12, 2002 Press Conference at NATO Headquarters, Brussels, Belgium

Does he write that gargabe out beforehand and remember it in order to confuse people?

He's really good at that sort of thing. Maybe he's been taking lessons from GW.

Diana  posted on  2005-07-01   22:35:45 ET  Reply   Untrace   Trace   Private Reply  

There are thing we know that we know. There are known unknowns. That is to say there are things that we now know we don't know. But there are also unknown unknowns. There are things we don't know we don't know. So when we do the best we can and we pull all this information together, and we then say well that's basically what we see as the situation, that is really only the known knowns and the known unknowns. And each year, we discover a few more of those unknown unknowns." Donald Rumsfeld, February 12, 2002 Press Conference at NATO Headquarters, Brussels, Belgium

Does he write that gargabe out beforehand and remember it in order to confuse people?

He's really good at that sort of thing. Maybe he's been taking lessons from GW.

He's got an earpiece hooked up to the latest technology (don't worry about the price, our children can pay for it). It whispers "know" and "un" randomly into his ear. He just repeats. Allow me to demonstrate with a translation.

There are thing we know that we know. There are know-un un-know-uns. That is to say there are things that we now know we don't know. But there are also un-know-un un-know-uns. There are things we don't know we don't know. So when we do the best we can and we pull all this information together, and we then say well that's basically what we see as the situation, that is really only the know-un know-uns and the know-un un-know-uns. And each year, we discover a few more of those un-know-un un-know-uns.

You will see that "know" was picked 16 times.
You will see that "un" was picked 16 times.

What more proof do you need? The random number generator is working perfectly!

GW's earpiece is much more complicated, mainly because it keeps falling out. That explains why some of his words can't be found in the dictionary. Sometimes he has to wing it.

markm0722  posted on  2005-07-01   23:24:37 ET  Reply   Untrace   Trace   Private Reply  

#19. To: markm0722 (#15)

It whispers "know" and "un" randomly into his ear. He just repeats. Allow me to demonstrate with a translation.

Funny!

I used to like to read the Bushisms and try to figure out what he was trying to say. Trying to decipher this stuff makes a good English excercise.

Diana  posted on  2005-07-02 06:43:07 ET  Reply   Untrace   Trace   Private Reply  

GW's earpiece is much more complicated, mainly because it keeps falling out. That explains why some of his words can't be found in the dictionary. Sometimes he has to wing it.

lol

christine  posted on  2005-07-02 10:21:55 ET  Reply   Untrace   Trace   Private Reply  

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