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Title: I Want To Be Number Two: Jim Webb (amusing)
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URL Source: http://www.236.com/news/2008/06/30/ ... _be_number_two_jim_we_7439.php
Published: Jul 1, 2008
Author: 23/6
Post Date: 2008-07-01 20:44:47 by christine
Keywords: None
Views: 140
Comments: 5
According to the Washington Times (a phrase we try to use sparingly), the vice presidential prospects of Virginia Senator Jim Webb have increased because of the passage of a new GI bill sponsored by Webb. Even aside from the bill, Webb has been the leading choice of many Democrats, mosty because of his combat veteran, tough guy image. Interestingly, the community that most seems to want to want Webb is the highly educated, internet using segment of the Obama coalition. If you know of a skinny, male, clunky glasses-wearing Obama fan who graduated from Oberlin, he's probably rooting for Webb to get the nod. There's nothing like the love nerds have for the one a-hole jock that's nice to them (it's the same reason the press loves McCain). So what does Webb bring to the ticket, besides his thrilling, frightening masculinity? The goods below. JIM WEBB Age: 61 Astrological sign: Aquarius Quick bio: Goes to Vietnam Gets lots of combat medals. Secretary of the Navy under Reagan. Runs for Senate against George Allen. George Allen calls a guy "macaca." Webb wins. A-hole factor (1-10): 5 Vibe: Manly RGI (Regular Guyness Index): +7 Veteran: +2 Combat veteran: +3 Has killed people: +7 Won an Emmy for a PBS show: -2 Novelist: -3 Pro: Having a guy on the ticket who has killed people and shoots guns and stuff makes the ticket look manly. Con: Would remind you that Obama needs to be around a guy who has killed people and shoots guns and stuff to feel manly. Pro: Has steamy sex scenes in novels. Con: Has steamy sex scenes in novels. Pro: Has been called a "boor" by George Will Con: There is no con to that one. Pro: Super manly. Con: Which means he's obviously gay. How Bangable by Opposite Sex (1-10): 7. How Bangable by Same Sex (1-10): 9. Most likely scandal: During a flashback at a State of the Union speech, Webb wipes out most of the cabinet with his bare hands. Odds of being chosen: 3 - 1. Notable quote: "She stood back up, her face smiling proudly and her round breasts glistening from a spotlight in the dim bar, and left the banana on the bar, cut in four equal sections by the muscles of her vagina." Taken from Webb's announcement of campaign for U.S. Senate. (Not really. It's from one of his novels, but this is the sort of thing that might make vice presidential speeches a lot more fun if he gets the nod.)
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#1. To: christine (#0)
Oh yeah? Bring it on! George Will humps ottomans, I'm sure there's a clip of that around here somewhere...
And they write innumerable books; being too vain and distracted for silence: seeking every one after his own elevation, and dodging his emptiness. - T. S. Eliot
Did Webb really write that?
Antiparty - find out why, think about 'how'
You're asking the wrong person... :)
And they write innumerable books; being too vain and distracted for silence: seeking every one after his own elevation, and dodging his emptiness. - T. S. Eliot
Allen Blasts Webb Novels For Sex Scenes Veteran Says Works Reflect Trauma of War
Why? LOL. "Conspiracy of Silence", a documentary listed for viewing in TV Guide Magazine was to be aired on the Discovery Channel, on May 3, 1994. This documentary exposed a network of religious leaders and Washington politicians who flew children to Washington D.C. for sex orgies. At the last minute before airing, unknown congressmen threatened the TV Cable industry with restrictive legislation if this documentary was aired. Almost immediately, the rights to the documentary were purchased by unknown persons who had ordered all copies destroyed. A copy of this videotape was furnished anonymously to former Nebraska state senator and attorney John De Camp who made it available to retired F.B.I. chief, Ted L. Gunderson. While the video quality is not top grade, this tape is a blockbuster in what is revealed by the participants involved.
Notable quote: "She stood back up, her face smiling proudly and her round breasts glistening from a spotlight in the dim bar, and left the banana on the bar, cut in four equal sections by the muscles of her vagina."
#2. To: Dakmar (#1)
#3. To: a vast rightwing conspirator (#2)
#4. To: a vast rightwing conspirator (#2)
#5. To: christine (#0)
a phrase we try to use sparingly
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