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Title: Obama releases list of approved Obama Jokes
Source:
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URL Source: http://borowitzreport.com/
Published: Jul 16, 2008
Author: Andy Borowitz
Post Date: 2008-07-16 16:55:30 by Jethro Tull
Keywords: None
Views: 493
Comments: 11
The five jokes, which Sen. Obama said he is making available to all comedians free of charge, are as follows: 1) Barack Obama and a kangaroo pull up to a gas station. The gas station attendant takes one look at the kangaroo and says, "You know, we don't get many kangaroos here." Barack Obama replies, "At these prices, I'm not surprised. That's why we need to reduce our dependence on foreign oil." 2) A traveling salesman knocks on the door of a farmhouse, and much to his surprise, Barack Obama answers the door. The salesman says, "I was expecting the farmer's daughter." Barack Obama replies, "She's not here. The farm was foreclosed on because of subprime loans that are making a mockery of the American Dream." 3) A horse walks into a bar. The bartender says, "Why the long face?" Barack Obama replies, "His jockey just lost his health insurance, which should be the right of all Americans." 4) Q: What's black and white and red all over? 5) A Christian, a Jew and Barack Obama are in a rowboat in the middle of the ocean. Barack Obama says, "This joke isn't going to work because there's no Muslim in this boat."
Barack Obama: The New Yorker magazine, which should be embarrassed after publishing such a tasteless and offensive cover, which I reject and denounce.
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#1. To: Jethro Tull (#0)
Barack Obama replies, "The Kenyan guy already got her and I'm the result."
LOL! Enlist today!
i like that one ;)
Another lame joke approved and paid for by Obama for President: Barack Obama drives through an Arkansas toll booth. The guy working the toll recognizes Obama and asks him where he's going. "HOPE!" He then asks Obama how he wishes to pay for the toll. "With CHANGE!" Then the guy at the toll realizes that Obama is going in the wrong direction, and tells him that he can't get to Hope using that tollway. "YES WE CAN!"
Yeah, me too, just for the fact that only about one in a thousand Uhhmerkins would understand it.
Barack Obama drives through an Arkansas toll booth. The guy working the toll recognizes Obama and asks him where he's going. "HOPE!" He then asks Obama how he wishes to pay for the toll. "With CHANGE!" Then the guy at the toll realizes that Obama is going in the wrong direction, and tells him that he can't get to Hope using that tollway. "YES WE CAN!" Si, se puede vero opossumus!
"If you love wealth more than liberty, the tranquility of servitude better than the animating contest of freedom, depart from us in peace. We ask not your counsel nor your arms. Crouch down and lick the hand that feeds you. May your chains rest lightly upon you and may posterity forget that you were our countrymen.”—Samuel Adams
"I know! It's hilarious. Bill thought he was the President, too.”
hahaha That's a good one, TT!
You may be the president, but you know that you're not 'in charge' of squat.
How many Obamas does it take to get a 40' RV past the Kneivel family and across Snake River Canyon?
The ultimate effect of shielding men from the effects of folly is to fill the world with fools. - Herbert Spencer
The salesman says, "I was expecting the farmer's daughter."
I've already said too much.
#2. To: Jethro Tull (#0)
1) Barack Obama and a kangaroo pull up to a gas station. The gas station attendant takes one look at the kangaroo and says, "You know, we don't get many kangaroos here." Barack Obama replies, "At these prices, I'm not surprised. That's why we need to reduce our dependence on foreign oil."
#3. To: Jethro Tull (#0)
5) A Christian, a Jew and Barack Obama are in a rowboat in the middle of the ocean. Barack Obama says, "This joke isn't going to work because there's no Muslim in this boat."
#4. To: Jethro Tull (#0)
(Edited)
#5. To: Jethro Tull (#0)
#6. To: christine (#3)
i like that one
#7. To: Rupert_Pupkin (#4)
Another lame joke approved and paid for by Obama for President:
#8. To: Jethro Tull, Rotara, Litus, Original_Intent (#0)
#9. To: TwentyTwelve, Jethro Tull, Rotara, Original_Intent (#8)
"I know! It's hilarious. Bill thought he was the President, too.”
~ Robert the Brus - "The Declaration of Arbroath"
#10. To: TwentyTwelve, all (#8)
#11. To: TwentyTwelve (#8)
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