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All is Vanity
See other All is Vanity Articles

Title: America deserves national health care
Source: me, myself, I
URL Source: [None]
Published: Aug 6, 2008
Author: One very angry janitor.
Post Date: 2008-08-06 19:47:12 by Pissed Off Janitor
Keywords: FEDGOV, healthcare, utopia
Views: 234
Comments: 6

I, for one, now welcome a national health care plan for America. I've come out against it before, but over the last 7 years of my medical troubles I've finally seen the truth. America needs it. No, deserves it.

We deserve it. We deserve it the same way a spoiled child deserves a good spanking or how an idiot who spends he free time throwing rocks at a bee hive deserves to be stung +50 times by a swarm of angry bees.

You may ask, "Gee POJ, what finally convinced you that all loving and all knowing FEDGOV can give us better health care?"

I'd be tempted to say that it was when the VA wanted to rip the breathing assisting machine away from my grandfather, because of a paperwork snafu, as his lungs were filling with his own bodily fluids.

But no, that wasn't it. What finally convinced me that the government that gave us Katrina and the Iraq war can also give top quality health care for all came early this morning.

The last 5 years dealing with state level programs were not very helpful. One was enough of a tease to get my hopes up before the resounding and ever constant "fuck you, go die."

So, for the last two and a half years I've battled my way though FEDGOV's mountain of forms and rules, which are all for my benefit I'm sure, with hopes of having better luck. And luck I did have! Yes, it's 6 to 8 months between each disability hearing. Yes, a Judge and not a doctor determines just how ill you are. Yes, the Judge I had never read the medical files I sent him and somehow made this my fault...twice. Sure, I only ever talked to him though a CCTV and never met him in person. But things are bound to change for the better. They have to be gracious and give me my own tax dollars back sooner or later. Right? Third time's a charm!

I moved to a new state and began the process anew. New state, new judge. And why a judge and not a doctor to determine how ill someone is? Because you obviously don't understand the genius of government run health care

The big day came today after another 8 month wait. Good thing I'm not ill or anything otherwise all these delays might be a problem. I showed up half an hour early just like the forms said I should. I brought all of my medical records (the entire 6 inch stack) just like the forms said I should. I go to the building and room number listed on the half dozen forms they sent me.

I get there and...the door is locked. No problem, in this crazy post 9/11 world I've been treated like a potential terrorist in such facilities more than once. So, I wait. And wait. And wait some more. Until finally a helpful janitor, maybe out of kinship due to my previous profession, informs me that said office is no longer located there.

Gee, the now empty office is the exact same location that the half a dozen confirmation letters they sent me told me to go to. There isn't even a sign on the front door telling me they are closed. There is no indication of where the new office is. Now that I'm at the wrong location and have no idea where the current hearing is I have not a clue as to how the judge rule. If he ruled at all. Who knows? The mystery is half the fun.

The bitter cynic in me says they did this on purpose, but I'm sure that's not true. I mean, when has FEDGOV ever promised something and then backed out on the deal after they got what they wanted?

Truly this is the best health care system ever!

This is the kind of health care service America deserves. I can't wait until such simplicity and genius is the standard across the nation.

I look forward to the day when people will need 3 doctors visits and a background check to buy Flintstones chewable vitamins for their kids. I look forward to the day when a panel of lawyers, after a week's deliberation, will tell gunshot and stabbing victims that they could find no need for them to receive medical care at the ER. I look forward to having to buy antibiotics and heart medication out of the back of a rusty van in some back alley if I want to get them in a timely fashion. I look forward to some bureaucrat running into an OR in the middle of an operation and cutting the anesthesia off because the 3 dozen forms it requires were not filled out properly.

But you know what I look forward to the most? The fact that such a simple and effective system will be financed at gunpoint. Silly prole, you don't buy into that voluntary line do you? It'll be about as voluntary as stop-lossed soldiers staying in Iraq or those roving checkpoints where you are under no legal obligation to stop but running them is a felony. It's for our own good.

I think a health care plan were any attempt to "opt out" by not financing it via taxation will result in confiscation of all property and prison time is very good reflection on modern America today. And those that physically resist will be gunned down without mercy or hesitation, because only a dangerous and deranged lunatic wouldn't want to take part in this wondrous deal.

America deserves this, every bit.

P.S. I looked what Judge means on the paperwork. My medical well being is in the hands of an "Administrative Law Judge." Because they know all about medicine. Just like how a doctor knows when you need to change the oil in your car.

P.S.S The only thing that would make this more bizarre is if the judge did rule in my favor. I honestly don't rule it out because that is how screwy this whole mess is.

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Begin Trace Mode for Comment # 3.

#3. To: Pissed Off Janitor (#0)

POJ, isn't what you're describing here a dose of local government interjecting itself into a medical decision? I catch the well placed sarcasm, but perhaps an attorney who specializes in job related disabilities was the way to go? And there must be appeals, no? Anyway, as one who has been thru medical interpretation by other than doctors, I empathize with you.

Jethro Tull  posted on  2008-08-06   20:16:01 ET  Reply   Untrace   Trace   Private Reply  


Replies to Comment # 3.

#4. To: Jethro Tull (#3)

I catch the well placed sarcasm, but perhaps an attorney who specializes in job related disabilities was the way to go?

Already tried that the first two times around. Remember how I said the judge not reading my medical files was my fault? He spread some blame to a disability lawyer I brought in too.

I love that one needs a lawyer to even have a chance at getting all that "free" help.

And there must be appeals, no?

This last screwup was round three. The first two times the judge would not even make a ruling. Now they just lock the door and turn out the lights till I go away.

My temper will not allow me a 4th try.

Pissed Off Janitor  posted on  2008-08-06 22:45:07 ET  Reply   Untrace   Trace   Private Reply  


End Trace Mode for Comment # 3.

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