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Title: What Would Jesus Drive?
Source: [None]
URL Source: [None]
Published: Oct 28, 2008
Author: Email
Post Date: 2008-10-28 17:28:31 by Turtle
Keywords: None
Views: 407
Comments: 17

* One theory is that Jesus would tool around in an old Plymouth because "the Bible says God drove Adam and Eve out of the Garden of Eden in a Fury."

* But in Psalm 83, the Almighty clearly owns a Pontiac and a Geo. The passage urges the Lord to "pursue your enemies with your Tempest and terrify them with your Storm."

* Perhaps God favors Dodge pickup trucks because Moses' followers are warned not to go up a mountain "until the Ram's horn sounds a long blast."

* Some scholars insist that Jesus drove a Honda but didn't like to talk about it. As proof, they cite a verse in St. John's gospel where Christ tells the crowd, "For I did not speak of my own Accord . . . "

* Meanwhile, Moses rode an old British motorcycle, as evidenced by a Bible passage declaring that "the roar of Moses' Triumph is heard in the hills."

* Joshua drove a Triumph sports car with a hole in its muffler: "Joshua's Triumph was heard throughout the land."

* And, following the Master's lead, the Apostles carpooled in a Honda: "The Apostles were in one Accord"!

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#11. To: Turtle (#0)

Jesus would drive a Mercedes-Benz, prompting Abe Foxman to call for a boycott of Christianity due to the Nazi symbolism of "a leader in an M-B"....

X-15  posted on  2008-10-28   17:50:45 ET  Reply   Untrace   Trace   Private Reply  


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