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Religion
See other Religion Articles

Title: The False God of Christmas
Source: The Ignorant Fishermen (no kidding)
URL Source: http://www.theignorantfishermen.com ... 12/false-god-of-christmas.html
Published: Dec 5, 2008
Author: some nutjob
Post Date: 2008-12-05 11:02:32 by Rupert_Pupkin
Keywords: Santa, Christmas
Views: 159
Comments: 9

Parents, often without even realizing it, have been teaching their children the following things about Santa Claus:

SANTA IS OMNISCIENT He knows how children behave throughout the year. The familiar song says, "He knows if we've been good or bad." Also he knows exactly what children want for Christmas even if the child does not have an opportunity to tell him personally.

SANTA IS OMNIPOTENT No storm is too great to hinder Santa from performing his annual miracle of delivering gifts throughout the world. He also defies the laws of nature by flying and by coming down the narrowest (and hottest!) of chimneys! Nor should we forget his amazing ability to produce millions of gifts throughout the year. Is anything too hard for Santa? With Santa all things are possible!

SANTA IS OMNIPRESENT To visit every home in the world in one evening requires nothing less than omnipresence! Every child in the world can wake up in the morning and say, "Santa has been here! Santa was present in my home!" Prior to Christmas Santa also appears at hundreds of street corners and shopping centers throughout the country at the same time!

SANTA IS FAITHFUL You can always count on Santa! Santa never fails and he never breaks his word. When Santa makes a promise he keeps it! When he promises a child a gift, that child will never be disappointed. Children are fully persuaded that what Santa has promised he is able also to perform. The child that believes in Santa will not be put to shame! Santa is totally dependable and trustworthy!

SANTA IS ETERNAL Santa with his white beard and weather-beaten face is the very essence of eternity. Year after year goes by and Santa grows no older. Generations have come and gone but Santa is still here. His life is endless and Santa cannot die. To Santa belongs an unending life.

SANTA IS IMMUTABLE Yesterday, today, forever Santa is the same! He never seems to change. He is always happy! He is always jolly. He is always kind to children. In a changing world you can always count on Santa being Santa!

SANTA IS LOVE Santa loves all the boys and girls in the world. Santa is no respecter of persons. He loves them all--red and yellow, black and white, they are precious in his sight.

SANTA IS RIGHTEOUS All that Santa does is right! He makes no mistakes. He does all things well. Every child's stocking contains exactly the right thing.

SANTA IS GOOD Santa showers his blessings upon all. Every good and perfect gift comes from Santa. He is the supreme GIVER of Christmas. It is Santa who brings the best gift of all!

SANTA IS SOVEREIGN On Christmas Eve Santa is in complete control of the situation. Circumstances do not phase him (such as storms, sizes of chimneys, red-hot fire places, etc.). He is the King of Christmas!

SANTA IS COMING Santa is coming to town. You better be ready! You better watch out! You better be good! He's coming! Are you prepared when Santa comes to reward every boy or girl according to his work? Millions of boys and girls each year wait with eager expectancy for the glorious appearing of the great Santa god. What a blessed hope for countless numbers of children! His reward is with him! What a comforting hope the boys and girls have as they prepare for his coming! And during the night he may come at any time. Even so, come, Santa Claus!

SANTA IS WORSHIPPED Santa is worshipped and loved by thousands of children the world around. Children love him so much that all through the year they seek to please him in such a way that when they see him they will not be ashamed. O come let us adore HIM! [Parents, is this the god you want your children to know and love? Is it important to tell our children the truth even when they are very young? What have you taught your children about the TRUE GOD, and His beloved Son, the Lord Jesus Christ? Have you taught them who the Great GIVER of Christmas is (John 3:16)? Do they know about the gift of God which is eternal life (Rom. 6:23)?]

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Poster Comment:

I thought that this was a joke when I first saw it, but then I realized that there really are a lot of humorless, killjoy fanatics in the world. And not all of them have turbans, beards, and unpronounceable names.

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Begin Trace Mode for Comment # 4.

#4. To: Rupert_Pupkin (#0) (Edited)

"Puritanism, n.: The haunting fear that someone, somewhere, might be happy."
~ H.L. Mencken

Original_Intent  posted on  2008-12-05   14:29:48 ET  Reply   Untrace   Trace   Private Reply  


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