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Title: You wonder why the Government is in trouble?
Source: [None]
URL Source: [None]
Published: Feb 8, 2009
Author: .
Post Date: 2009-02-08 20:21:42 by farmfriend
Ping List: *Humor-Weird News*     Subscribe to *Humor-Weird News*
Keywords: None
Views: 215
Comments: 7

You wonder why the Government is in trouble?

This is kind of scary

A Washington DC airport ticket agent offers some examples of why our country is in trouble!

1. I had a New Hampshire Congresswoman ask for an aisle seat so that her hair wouldn't get messed up by being near the window. (On an airplane!)

2. I got a call from a candidate's staffer, who wanted to go to Capetown. I started to explain the length of the flight and the passport information, then she interrupted me with, "I'm not trying to make you look stupid, but Capetown is in Massachusetts." Without trying to make her look stupid, I calmly explained, "Cape Cod is in Massachusetts, Capetown is in Africa." Her response - click.

3. A senior Vermont Congressman called, furious about a Florida package we did. I asked what was wrong with the vacation in Orlando. He said he was expecting an ocean-view room. I tried to explain that's not possible, since Orlando is in the middle of the state. He replied, "Don't lie to me, I looked on the map and Florida is a very thin state!"

4. I got a call from a lawmaker's wife who asked, "Is it possible to see England from Canada?" I said, "No." She said, "But they look so close on the map."

5. An aide for a cabinet member once called and asked if he could rent a car in Dallas. When I pulled up the reservation, I noticed he had only a one-hour layover in Dallas. When I asked him why he wanted to rent a car, he said, "I heard Dallas was a big airport, and we will need a car to drive between gates to save time."

6. An Illinois Congresswoman called last week. She needed to know how it was possible that her flight from Detroit left at 8:30 AM got to Chicago at 8:33 AM. I explained that Michigan was an hour ahead of Illinois , but she couldn't understand the concept of time zones. Finally, I told her the plane went fast, and she bought that.

7. A New York lawmaker called and asked, "Do airlines put your physical description on your bag so they know whose luggage belongs to whom?" I said, "No, why do you ask?" She replied, "Well, when I checked in with the airline, they put a tag on my luggage that said (FAT), and I'm overweight. I think that's very rude!" After putting her on hold for a minute while I looked into it, I came back and explained the city code for Fresno, CA is (FAT - Fresno Air Terminal), and the airline was just putting a destination tag on her luggage.

8. A Senator's aide called to inquire about a trip package to Hawaii. After going over all the cost info, she asked, "Would it be cheaper to fly to California and then take the train to Hawaii?"

9. I just got off the phone with a freshman Congressman who asked, "How do I know which plane to get on?" I asked him what exactly he meant, to which he replied, "I was told my flight number is 823, but none of these planes have numbers on them."

10. A lady Senator called and said, "I need to fly to Pepsi-Cola, Florida. Do I have to get on one of those little computer planes?" I asked if she meant fly to Pensacola, Fl on a commuter plane. She said, "Yeah, whatever, smarty!"

11. A senior Senator called and had a question about the documents he needed in order to fly to China. After a lengthy discussion about passports, I reminded him that he needed a visa'. "Oh, no I don't. I've been to China many times and never had to have one of those." I double checked and sure enough, his stay required a visa. When I told him this he said, "Look, I've been to China four times and every time they have accepted my American Express!"

12. A New Mexico Congress woman called to make reservations, "I want to go from Chicago to Rhino, New York." I was at a loss for words. Finally, I said, "Are you sure that's the name of the town?" "Yes, what flights do you have?" replied the lady. After some searching, I came back with, "I'm sorry, ma'am, I've looked up every airport code in the country and can't find a Rhino anywhere." The lady retorted, "Oh, don't be silly! Everyone knows where it is. Check your map!" So I scoured a map of the state of New York and finally offered, "You don't mean Buffalo , do you?" The reply? "Whatever! I knew it was a big animal."

Now you know why the Government is in the shape it's in! Subscribe to *Humor-Weird News*

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#1. To: farmfriend (#0) (Edited)

Dear God.

I hope that you made all this up - but who could imagine this stupidity?

Thanks for the info.

Lordy....

Iran Truth Now!

Lod  posted on  2009-02-08   20:37:58 ET  Reply   Trace   Private Reply  


#2. To: farmfriend (#0)

Remember, these folks are elected on their looks and their smile, not on what's inside their heads. I once commented to a neighbor: I see you're bringing up your toddler to be a politician. Looking at me indignantly, she asked why do you say that? Well, I said, he has a winning smile, he keeps waving his arms while talking and everything he says is gibberish.

Tatarewicz  posted on  2009-02-08   21:18:19 ET  Reply   Trace   Private Reply  


#3. To: Tatarewicz (#2)

snickering. Stay tuned for more.


Meet the new boss, same as the old boss — The Who

farmfriend  posted on  2009-02-08   21:23:20 ET  Reply   Trace   Private Reply  


#4. To: Tatarewicz, lodwick (#3)

THESE PEOPLE VOTE !!!

Some guy bought a new fridge for his house. To get rid of his old fridge, he put it in his front yard and hung a sign on it saying: "Free to good home. You want it, you take it".

For three days the fridge sat there without even one person looking twice at it. He eventually decided that people were too un-trusting of this deal. It looked too good to be true, so he changed the sign to read: "Fridge for sale $50". The next day someone stole it.

Caution! . . . These people Vote

===========

While looking at a house, my brother asked the real estate agent which direction was North because, he explained, he didn't want the sun waking him up every morning. She asked, "Does the sun rise in the North?"

When my brother explained that the sun rises in the East, (and has for some time), she shook her head and said, "Oh, I don't keep up with that stuff". . .

She ALSO votes!

===========

I used to work in technical support for a 24/7 call center. One day I got a call from an individual who asked what hours the call center was open. I told him, "The number you dialed is open 24 hours a day, 7 days a week." He responded, "Is that Eastern or Pacific time?"

Wanting to end the call quickly, I said, "Uh, Pacific" . . .

He ALSO votes!

===========

My colleague and I were eating our lunch in our cafeteria, when we overheard one of the administrative assistants talking about the sunburn she got on her weekend drive to the shore. She drove down in a> convertible, but "didn't think she'd get sunburned because the car was moving". . .

She ALSO votes!

===========

My friend has a lifesaving tool in her car. It's designed to cut through a seat belt if she gets trapped. She keeps it in the trunk...

My friend ALSO votes!

===========

My friends and I were on a beer run and noticed that the cases were discounted 10%. Since it was a big party, we bought 2 cases. The cashier multiplied 2 times 10% and gave us a 20% discount . . .

He ALSO votes!

===========

I was hanging out with a friend when we saw a woman with a nose ring attached to an earring by a chain. My friend said, "Wouldn't the chain rip out every time she turned her head?" I explained that a person's nose and ear remain the same distance apart no matter which way the head is turned.

My friend ALSO votes!

===========

I couldn't find my luggage at the Atlanta airport baggage area. So I went to the Delta Lost Luggage Office and told the woman there that my bags never showed up. She smiled and told me not to worry because she was a trained professional and I was in good hands. "Now," she asked me, "has your plane arrived yet? ". . .

SHE ALSO votes!

===========

While working at a Pizza Parlor I observed a man ordering a small pizza to go. He appeared to be alone and the cook asked him if he would like it cut into 4 pieces or 6. He though about it for some time before responding. "Just cut it into 4 pieces; I don't think I'm hungry enough to eat 6!"

Yep, he votes too.

===========

NOW YOU KNOW WHO ELECTS THE POLITICIANS


Meet the new boss, same as the old boss — The Who

farmfriend  posted on  2009-02-08   21:25:45 ET  Reply   Trace   Private Reply  


#5. To: farmfriend (#4)

Yes - there are geniuses amongst us.

Iran Truth Now!

Lod  posted on  2009-02-08   22:12:16 ET  Reply   Trace   Private Reply  


#6. To: farmfriend (#0) (Edited)

I can go one better..

My Insurance agent was born in Montana and now lives in Pa. His wife decided to surprise him, with a trip overseas for Christmas. So she called PennDOT for his Driving Records, as her Travel Agent told her that they were needed, for some countries, to be able to drive there.

After being on hold for over 1/2 hour, a young lady comes on. After explaining her need, the PennDOT worker asks why she was calling PennDot and not Montana? And more importantly, why would she call a DOT center in the US, when Montana was a Foreign Country.

After trying to explain that this young lady was incorrect, she ask to speak to someone higher in the CoC. And lo and behold, she got the same rely. At this point she was getting very upset and let the higher up know it.

Two days later she gets a letter from PennDOT informing her, that her Drivers License was revoked. As she clearly was a mental case and that she would need to see a doctor, to have it issued again..

Refinersfire  posted on  2009-02-08   23:20:04 ET  Reply   Trace   Private Reply  


#7. To: Refinersfire (#6)

LOL that's rich.


Meet the new boss, same as the old boss — The Who

farmfriend  posted on  2009-02-08   23:23:56 ET  Reply   Trace   Private Reply  


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