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Title: The Great and Wonderful Turtle Fixes Pugs and Gurls
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Published: Feb 18, 2009
Author: Turtle
Post Date: 2009-02-18 07:40:04 by Turtle
Keywords: None
Views: 907
Comments: 37
Since my first pug went to Pug Heave, I got Mickey, an abused, blind in one eye, seven year old rescue pug. His ribs were showing, his tail hung down, and he would not play. After a month, his ribs are no longer showing, his tail is curled, and he licks Turtle and now plays. Turtle fixe him but good. But them, Turtle is amazing. Turtle has also tamed several shews, as Shakespeare knew so well. Turtle his two Major Organs, his favorite one, and his Brain. His Minor Ones exists to support the Major Ones. Turtle has noticed most women just need a prper flogging with the appropriate Organ, and the shrewishness disappears. Turtle is amazing!
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#1. To: James Deffenbach, Cynicom, tom007 (#0)
Your Dirty Little Mind might find this funny.
Turtle better shape up on his typing or we may run him off the forum. In fact James, tom and I will probably get together a posse from the local saloon and show up at your hidey hole. The boys in the Long Branch are always available for a dustup with an errant turtle.
Turtle has not had his morning coffee since he is tired of pounding the beans with a hammer, and Obama will not send me a $20 coffee grinder, the selfish little jerk. Turtle can take all three of you with one paw tied behind his shell. He'll use the other to slap all three of you even sillier than you already are.
I am encouraging all my friends with puters to email Obongo asking for a handout. hehehehehehehe Ha...We already have a plan. While I, being the oldest, distract you from the front, James will be using a drill on your puny shell to vent those horrible vapors and Tom will use an air hammer on your tail, where your brain resides. hehehehehehehe
You forget Turtle is highly evolved and not a normal Turtle. He is closer to Hulk and is invincible to puny humans like you.
Turtle's Brain dangles where his two Major Organs should be.
Join 2x4 Tuesdays & protect your RKBA. Good heavens.......
One might suspect that those "organs" might be intertwined, interlocked,interknit,interlinked, and hopefully internecine. hehehehehehehehe
Indeed. It's one of the great physiological puzzles of modern zoology.
Join 2x4 Tuesdays & protect your RKBA. Are you accusing Turtle of being a ...Zooist...??? Horrible. Lets see him deny it.
That you, TLBSHOW? LOL! I don't know if you know who I am talking about but one guy who posted under that name was always putting BUT GOOD on the end of his sentences. And your post reminded me of him.
Liberty is not a means to a higher political end. It is itself the highest political end. Yep, just let me know when you and the boys are ready to ride and we will fix that galoot. YEEHAW!!!
Liberty is not a means to a higher political end. It is itself the highest political end. LOL!!! Good one. You do realize that I will have to have a gas mask if I am going to be venting fumes like that, don't you?
Liberty is not a means to a higher political end. It is itself the highest political end. You forget Turtle is not normal. There. Fixed it for you. You might be closer to normal if you wouldn't forget to take your meds. ahaha.
Liberty is not a means to a higher political end. It is itself the highest political end. Good heavens... I totally overlooked that aspect of this operation. Perhaps we will have to advise the local hazmat authorities. There is NO law that says we cannot pound on Turtles, we just cant eradicate 'em.
I totally overlooked that aspect of this operation. Perhaps we will have to advise the local hazmat authorities. Yes, I think they would want to be informed and it would be our duty to do that if we were venting hazardous fumes in or around any place people could be overcome and keel over.
Liberty is not a means to a higher political end. It is itself the highest political end. When can I expect my flogging?
I've done that. Went camping with the Scouts and the guy whose turn it was the buy the food had to have fresh ground beans. Sadly he forgot the grind the beans at home. Sigh. So there's Maggie, hammer in hand, smashing beans in a cast iron skillet. By God I'm going to have my coffee.
Turtle can vaporize your entire heads with the greatest of ease, not that you would miss them, since they're essentially empty anyway. You won't have any place to hang your hats, which I'm sure all of you wear with the bill backwards.. Turtle can zap all of you but good!
Turtle is just a gigolo and expects a check first. Turtle did finally have his morning coffee, dark French roast.
Dat you, TLBSHOW??? LOL! And if coffee fixes the typos you best get to drinking another gallon, ahaha. We won't have any to hang our hats? I'm all of you wear with the bill backwards? I don't know if you are Jabba the Hutt, Yoda, or Jar Jar Binks (or the aforementioned TLBSHOW).
Liberty is not a means to a higher political end. It is itself the highest political end. Turtle was drinking his coffee while typing and it had not totally taken effect yet. Turtle is Turtle, not OBGYN or whatever his name is.
LOL! I don't reckon he ever claimed to be a groinecologist (that is what Archie Bunker called gynecologists).
Liberty is not a means to a higher political end. It is itself the highest political end. Just had to laff.
"Satan / Cheney in "08" Laffing at Turtle will lead to your tiny, rudimentary head being vaporized!
Turtle laffs at your attempts to hit Him with your purses.
O thy majesty, the veritable shadow of God on earth, the Keeper of the Cosmic Clock, please forgive my transgressions and I will report to work at 6:00 tomorrow morning with my red hat on. (I need to talk to you about cynicom and the girl wait staff - you may not be getting what you want out of him, but, evidently, they are). On the other hand they are all very mellow in the morning instead of the will fulled shrews before he hired on.
"Satan / Cheney in "08" They must be easily satisfied gurls if they are made happy being flogged by Cyni "the Tiny" Com.
If you saw my stable of gurls, you would shoot yourself in shame. hewhehehehehe
Turtle has to wear patches over both eyes to make sure he DOESN'T see any of your gurls!
Here's my pack: "Satan / Cheney in "08" I decided to repost this again to rub your collective noses in Turtle's greatness. So there.
Wahhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh. I am so olde that I forget what it was that I use to chase the gurls for. Damn
Don't mention "gurls" and "stable(s)" to Turtle, at least not in the same sentence. You HAVE seen his #1 "gurl" on that you tube video, haven't you?
Liberty is not a means to a higher political end. It is itself the highest political end. Yes, simply horrible.
Must not be any laws against "dating" outside your own species where he lives. ahaha.
Liberty is not a means to a higher political end. It is itself the highest political end.Turtle can still feel your envy, but still laffs.
No place is better than Turtle Island.
#2. To: farmfriend (#0)
No place is better than Turtle Island.
#3. To: Turtle, James deffenbach, tom007 (#0)
#4. To: Cynicom (#3)
Turtle better shape up on his typing or we may run him off the forum.
No place is better than Turtle Island.
#5. To: Turtle, tom007, James Deffenbach (#4)
and Obama will not send me a $20 coffee grinder, the selfish little jerk.
#6. To: Cynicom, James Deffenbach, tom007 (#5)
While I, being the oldest, distract you from the front, James will be using a drill on your puny shell to vent those horrible vapors and Tom will use an air hammer on your tail, where your brain resides. hehehehehehehe
No place is better than Turtle Island.
#7. To: Turtle (#0)
Turtle his two Major Organs, his favorite one, and his Brain.
www.righttokeepandbeararms.com
#8. To: randge, Turtle (#7)
Turtle's Brain dangles where his two Major Organs should be.
#9. To: randge (#7)
Turtle's Brain dangles where his two Major Organs should be.
#10. To: Cynicom (#9)
www.righttokeepandbeararms.com
#11. To: randge, turtle (#10)
It's one of the great physiological puzzles of modern zoology.
#12. To: Turtle (#0)
Turtle fixe him but good.
Lord Acton
#13. To: Cynicom (#3)
In fact James, tom and I will probably get together a posse from the local saloon and show up at your hidey hole. The boys in the Long Branch are always available for a dustup with an errant turtle.
Lord Acton
#14. To: Cynicom (#5)
While I, being the oldest, distract you from the front, James will be using a drill on your puny shell to vent those horrible vapors and Tom will use an air hammer on your tail, where your brain resides.
Lord Acton
#15. To: Turtle, Cynicom, tom007 (#6)
You forget Turtle is highly evolved and not a normal Turtle.
Lord Acton
#16. To: James Deffenbach (#14)
You do realize that I will have to have a gas mask if I am going to be venting fumes like that, don't you?
#17. To: Cynicom (#16)
Good heavens...
Lord Acton
#18. To: Turtle (#2)
Meet the new boss, same as the old boss — The Who
#19. To: Turtle (#4)
Turtle has not had his morning coffee since he is tired of pounding the beans with a hammer,
Meet the new boss, same as the old boss — The Who
#20. To: James Deffenbach, Cynicom, tom007 (#17)
(Edited)
No place is better than Turtle Island.
#21. To: farmfriend (#18)
my flogging.
No place is better than Turtle Island.
#22. To: Turtle (#20)
Turtle can zap all of you but good!
Lord Acton
#23. To: James Deffenbach (#22)
No place is better than Turtle Island.
#24. To: Turtle (#23)
Turtle is Turtle, not OBGYN or whatever his name is.
Lord Acton
#25. To: Turtle (#20)
Turtle can vaporize your entire heads with the greatest of ease, not that you would miss them, since they're essentially empty anyway. You won't have any place to hang your hats, which I'm sure all of you wear with the bill backwards..
#26. To: tom007 (#25)
(Edited)
Just had to laff.
No place is better than Turtle Island.
#27. To: randge, Cynicom, tom007, James Deffenbach (#7)
No place is better than Turtle Island.
#28. To: Turtle (#27)
#29. To: tom007 (#28)
(Edited)
No place is better than Turtle Island.
#30. To: Turtle (#29)
#31. To: Cynicom (#30)
If you saw my stable of gurls, you would shoot yourself in shame. hewhehehehehe
No place is better than Turtle Island.
#32. To: Turtle (#31)
#33. To: tom007, Cynicom, James Deffenbach (#32)
There's no place better thanTurtle Island.
#34. To: Turtle, tom007 (#33)
#35. To: Cynicom, Turtle (#30)
If you saw my stable of gurls, you would shoot yourself in shame. hewhehehehehe
Lord Acton
#36. To: James Deffenbach (#35)
You HAVE seen his #1 "gurl" on that you tube video, haven't you?
#37. To: Cynicom (#36)
Lord Acton
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